ok ... i have seen enough of it recently and it's just getting sad

[Guest062114-5]

Originally Posted by funster

Deciding whether or not to engage in an intimate and personal activity, such as sex, with a particular race is NOT racism, it is an issue of personal attraction. Providers should be able to make that personal choice, and that choice not limited to race, but other personal attractions or repulsions as well.

I hesitate to comment because I don't want to insult hobbyists in general. However, if providers only saw hobbyists they were genuinely attracted to (in the real world), there would be a lot of bored and starving providers and a bunch of frustrated hobbyists.

My personal opinion... providers have the right to choose whomever they wish for whatever reason they wish...and one of those valid reasons is being prejudiced against an entire race of men. We are all prejudiced in some way.

[funster]

Originally Posted by LilMynx69

I hesitate to comment because I don't want to insult hobbyists in general. However, if providers only saw hobbyists they were genuinely attracted to (in the real world), there would be a lot of bored and starving providers and a bunch of frustrated hobbyists.

My personal opinion... providers have the right to choose whomever they wish for whatever reason they wish...and one of those valid reasons is being prejudiced against an entire race of men. We are all prejudiced in some way.

I agree with everything you just said. And to your first paragraph, surely the business side of the exchange warrants capitulation to some personal dislikes. That just makes good sense.

All in all, any provider should have the right to set her own boundaries for the men she sees, based on her own preferences, however limited or expansive.

[Mavs fan]

Str8, I am a veteran too. 300 million Africans What? Are you saying that America Killed 300 million Africans? Or enslaved 300 million Africans? If that were true there would be more blacks than whites in America right now. There are only a little over 300 million people of all races in America in 2014. The Native Americans got their asses kicked in a war of conquest. A war that was over a long time ago, just like slavery was over a long time ago. And just so you are clear on the whole slavery thing, Hundreds of thousands of white soldiers died in the Civil War to end slavery. I think all of us agree that slavery was wrong. Can we move forward please.

[!VI!]

Originally Posted by funster

I was addressing your OP, which basically railed against providers publicly stating their personal policy of not seeing black men. My whole point was, why not? Just like KHC's refusal to see obese men, why impose a "see anyone" policy on any individual with personal preferences?

It seems to me, again following the thought line if your OP, that providers are basically pussy machines and as such should not discriminate, that personal preference should somehow be out the window in this business.

Deciding whether or not to engage in an intimate and personal activity, such as sex, with a particular race is NOT racism, it is an issue of personal attraction. Providers should be able to make that personal choice, and that choice not limited to race, but other personal attractions or repulsions as well.

so do you mean to say, if I as a provider decided not to see anyone who was black or anyone who has seen a black provider? because i'm not attracted to that thought, that doesn't make me racist it makes me just a picky provider?

[Guest062114-5]

I forgot to address CJ's point about providers who refuse to see a hobbyist who has seen a black provider. I haven't seen this, but if it's true...

My thoughts on that one: Ignorant. Racist. Trash.

That's all I've got for that one, lol.

[Jewish Lawyer]

Originally Posted by Wulf_Princess

During the last 30 days, i have actually been looking and researching many different providers, and studying many hobbiest from different sites.

The thing i don't understand is .... are the people in this country still so ignorant that we base a humans values on how much sun their skin is designed to take? But on the other side of the fence, MOST of the AA males or Females that have contacted me in past 30 days, excluding people from P411 and TER (so eccie is on the list) have been RATCHET AS HELL!

To be honest i have meet more ASSHOLE and scheming White males from ECCIE then any other race on ANY OTHER SITE! .... stupidity is not only immortal.... it's blind.... (speaking of categorizing based upon skin color...)

I agree with you. If we didn't notice race all the time, then maybe we could get rid of affirmative action, diversity initiatives, quotas, the obnoxious phrase "white male privilege" and guys like Al Sharpton making everything about race!!!
I would love a color blind society.
Why would someone come from Ireland to join the US Army, BTW? What is the attraction for a young, pretty girl like yourself to do that?

[Alyssa Marie]

I'm suprised no one has brought up the medias role in this yet, because it's huge.

[benssin]

Originally Posted by funster

I agree with everything you just said. And to your first paragraph, surely the business side of the exchange warrants capitulation to some personal dislikes. That just makes good sense.

All in all, any provider should have the right to set her own boundaries for the men she sees, based on her own preferences, however limited or expansive.

Funster, 100% correct man. Providers have the freedom to do this. Just like racist and homo-phobos have their freedom to express their views or beliefs. And I'm a big believe in the connection principle, where a provider/client click on more than just a sexual/monetary business but for physical, mental, and personality one. I suppose I don't see this posting as a forum to change anyone's right or belief, just one to discuss things thoroughly. And truth be told, the "spirit" beyond a policy like NBA or no AA friendly, sorta like 'the spirit of the law' phrase.

And despite the fact a provider should have the right to enforce the policy, I believe, I also believe that policy produces strong reactions due to its connotations. For example: a provider to deny service to a single individual client is nothing new. Happens all the time. Notice there when you read it, individual stands out. You haven't painted the canvas so to speak so no grouping or generalization has been made OR broadcasted (key word there). It is done on a case by case level. However when one see's that she denies service based one particular detail, i.e. skin pigmentation, then the canvas becomes colored. Automatically.

But then it doesn't just stay on the picture, does it. It colors others. It influences. It spreads. It begins to take a life of its own. Other providers naturally place the terms in their ads before they really think about the ramifications of it. Then it becomes something that most see if the real fight against modern examples of racism/bigotry. It becomes institutionalized. It becomes a standard. A practice. Providers do it, just because it's done. It's easy. It's just a small group. Not my fight or problem. After all, separate but equal right? Etc.

That's not to say the provider is racist. And I believe most aren't. I do believe some have legitimate reasons, bad experiences that literally COLOR their opinion, while others have other influential markers like how they were raised, etc. But I believe a major point of contention for the originator of this thread was how many of these threads existed, even researched (perhaps in a sorta 'guess-a-mation' way with that 80% line) a sample, and whether this is a good thing based on the idea of social and racial progress.

Because, many (particular in the white community) want the black community to just to move on, forget about race and let's all sing kumbaya, treating prejudice and the institutionalization of it as something in America's dark past. But then black community is confronted by these institutional limits, that seemingly no other group has that pure eliminates them from contention or fairness. So, it's hard to more on when the institutional practices of limitation (ie, what most scream as racism immediately with thinking of if it truly is) are slapped back in a group's face. Not only by whites tho, but by all provider groups.

Again, just that 'preference' to eliminate any entire demographic broadcasted as a legitimate reason and not discussed/confronted lends itself to abuse and institutionalized practices, without a single thought if it's really what that provider wants to do. And that's the "spirit of the rule" bit coming for circle. I suppose, besides how it affects me choices of providers or how naturally interested I'm in about all such social affairs that make us who we are as a nation, that's the main reason to debate/discuss with anyone this pattern of limiting preference policies. To educate and perhaps see an openness. Perhaps not to change. But maybe.

I'm almost positive that in the end, Green is the most value color around these parts. And I'm not responding to your statements as a rebuttal, because you are right that a provider should have the right to see who they want, and preferences, comfort levels, and other factors should apply in her decision to see someone, especially in the context of sexual connections. However, so to, is the right for someone to consider, discuss, and bring up a pattern (such as Wulf_Princess/others have done) to raise awareness and to have those providers consider their actions carefully, of whether to have a totally exclusionary policy or not. But whether they do or don't, it is the equal right of the provider to choose this policy and for us as a community of hobbyists and providers to discuss it as a practice.

[fletch]

has it been 30 days already????????

time sure does fly

[benssin]

Originally Posted by EasyLover214

Very sincerely thank you for sharing. As your stereotypical middle-aged white guy this statement really said something to me. I'm adamant that we're all just people and my upbringing had blacks, gays, and drunks (my uncles covered it all) and my mother really brought us up to not see color.

Reading what you've endured helps people like me understand the emotion in a thread like this and why it keeps coming up.

Thank you again.

When I read the quote you were replying to, man, I feel you. I appreciate the sentiments of your words truly I do. And also am so grateful that we are living in a generation and time where so many of us (black, white, yellow, red, green lol...I wish their where green ppl) can get along, and not only "tolerate" but generally appreciate one another in our differences, flaws, and similarities.

That story about the little girl and eyes made me cringe. To be fair, and I'm very pleased by this, I haven't had a large amount bigotry in my life. It hasn't played a role in making me anger or bitter or suspicious of other groups like so many other have. But that tail, if it is true, is the reason why I know it might never really go away in our or our grandkids generations. Just because if a lil girl can be taught how to hate so intensely (and I'm making a huge ASSumption on that), then what I believe about the Human Condition, that it carries great joy, pain, good and evil within it, will always be with us and always be a constant battle to fight/suppress.

But thank you for your words. In the most gentlest of ways, sir, your light of understanding touches many of us, and reminds me the reason why I choose love over hate in my heart.

[benssin]

Originally Posted by Alyssa Marie

I'm suprised no one has brought up the medias role in this yet, because it's huge.

Totally Agree Alyssa. Very valid point. My past I completely neglected this, though I think the spirit of my post would have covered it. The media is a huge problem AND solution. And it's tough to just categorize it as a major problem fairly...but should reflect why we are still wrestling with the issue. Race, just like sex in the public forum, is so sensationalized. Everyone has an opinion and passion runs deep. So, can you blame them for covering it so much. Heck yea! lol. But at the same time, if they didn't, could/would we move forward? Hmm. Curious thought. Like this posting. Very many opinions and it's been...mostly civil, which is a good reflection on all of us. But yea, the media is in it for the $$$, and like sex, social topics like race & orientation get the most eyeballs and clicks...and the data sadly proves that the American society LOVES to nit pick these topics.

[Guest060214]

Interesting replies. I can see why it will be a big challenge to defeat racism.

I have a friend who has a retail store. He has noticed that an overwhelming percentage of customers from one ethnic group believes that prices are negotiable on everything. He's getting tired of dealing with that culture. My suggestion is for him to ban that entire group. He can call it his business prerogative if anyone objects and he's free to do whatever he wants. It's his business.

[Guest062114-5]

Another option is to simply point at the sign posted that says:


Prices are Non-negotiable. Thank you for you patronage."

[Alyssa Marie]

Originally Posted by LilMynx69

Another option is to simply point at the sign posted that says:


Prices are Non-negotiable. Thank you for you patronage."

And the irony? That culture loves American tourists because we don't barter. If we go to Mexico and ask, "how much?" We either buy or we don't.

Well, the most of us.

A lot of hostility has to do with the stubbornness of, "my way is right." It's a shame. We only have one life, we should enjoy it.

I was raised in Maryland. My mom in the county, my dad in Baltimore. I didn't grow up in fear of people with a different skin color. I smile at people. If someone smiles back it says a lot about them. It doesn't matter what color you are. The people that smile back are the people that I deal with. The rest don't matter. A speck on the earth.

[Guest060214]

Originally Posted by LilMynx69

Another option is to simply point at the sign posted that says:


Prices are Non-negotiable. Thank you for you patronage."

The sign exists. A lot of them can't read English.

I still think the better solution is to not allow them to shop there. Easiest way to solve the problem. We're all too busy to worry about being tolerant....