Respect a simple yet lost concept

[London Rayne]

Originally Posted by ninasastri

you rock girl, and what i love about you is how you manage to be even in the most intricate situations calm and i like how you get your point across without being rude or writing superficial hogwash without meaning. I will try to learn from you . You are a good teacher to broaden my skills.

I have - so far - encountered two types of rudes on this board: The ones are the ones who act like me - using strong words and being unpolite . The others are like the one`s who i argue against :-) (lol) they are the ones who write superficial hogwash without meaning and judgemental stuff without explanation. Both is rude.

London has the unique skill to say something meaningful , bring the point across and maintain within the area of civilty. I adore that in a person. You have great communicative skills

All you need to learn is to say "Kiss my azz" in fewer words girl. You are just fine the way you are. Some people are so afraid to misspell a word for impression's sake, they can't even muster more than 3 sentences and still make sense lol.

I find it comical and downright hilarious how certain people "think" they are above others just because of where they post or how many they see. Right, keep telling yourself that.

[Valerie]

Originally Posted by Valerie

First off, I think too many people mistake difference in opinions as being disrespectful.
It really seems like if a person is not used to being challenged/debated, or is very narrow-minded, then they usually don't respond well to anyone who thinks differently than they do....

I'm a very open-minded woman, and I will be the first to admit that I have a smoking hot temper, and to quote WTF," a sharp tongue", and sometimes if I'm feeling very passionate about an issue I can come across as being disrespectful, I admit that, but the more someone gets to know me, they understand 9 out of 10 times, I'm not meaning to be, I'm just quite straight forward...

I'm not going to lie, I honestly don't think everyone is automatically entitled to respect. When I first meet someone,( or on here- read another member's thoughts), I try and get to know what they are all about, then once I've had a feel for them, they may have my respect, or they may not...

To clarify, just because I may not personally respect someone, doesn't mean I don't respect what they have to say. There are several people on eccie whom I care not for, however, If I feel they have a valid point on a topic, I will respectfully agree with them, regardless of my feelings of them as a whole....

Just wanted to ad also, that if I don't respect someone, they will most definitely know it. Not because I'm a "disrespectful" person, but because there are no false pretenses with me, and I don't think there is anything wrong with that

[Naomi4u]

[Ansley]

Originally Posted by London Rayne

Those who don't like it, can take a hike.

Originally Posted by Ansley

That's what's so frustrating, they already have.

Originally Posted by London Rayne

Could you not speak in riddles please? I have no clue what you are talking about. I am not pimping anyone out, so I can't control what anyone does. I don't run away from people who piss me off....I just don't respond to them. Simple. It is the internet by God...we are not all going to agree.

You are right we all don't agree with everything. But because of the lack of civility and consideration of others, people have stopped posting.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by Natalie

That's true, yet I don't think politeness and honesty should be at odds with one another. The best communicators are both at the same time. I believe an honest, perhaps even brutally so, message is most poignant when delivered with civility and respect.

You are certainly right with that one, Natalie, i could not agree more.

[Naomi4u]

Originally Posted by Valerie

Just wanted to ad also, that if I don't respect someone, they will most definitely know it. Not because I'm a "disrespectful" person, but because there are no false pretenses with me, and I don't think there is anything wrong with that

I am the exact same way. I looooove you for that Val!

[London Rayne]

Originally Posted by Valerie

Just wanted to ad also, that if I don't respect someone, they will most definitely know it. Not because I'm a "disrespectful" person, but because there are no false pretenses with me, and I don't think there is anything wrong with that

Ok,,,what she said, since I always come off bi3chy.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by Ansley

You are right we all don't agree with everything. But because of the lack of civility and consideration of others, people have stopped posting.

you forgot to mention the ones who might have stopped posting long ago because there might be people on this board who think they are so much smarter and post chasticing, yet polite hogwash without meaning or references all the time, because they might think they own the board and have to take a pee in every direction even if they don`t really have something to say(scuse my french). Its hypothetically possible these people do exist? I have heard of them when they PM me :-)

So my point is that, Ansley, there are always some who won`t post for whatever reason. I feel there are a lot of people on here who really do have something to say and feel they don`t post anymore because people are rude enough to not even engage in a honest discussion but rather just making superficial statements to just heighten their presence on the board (look at my polygamy and polyamory thread where someone posted without even reading the article, wouldn`t you say that IS rude?? Why would people do such a thing except because of carelessness and mobbing? Polite words aside. It does not matter to me if someone posts hogwash in polite if its just to mob me. If i have nothing to say, wouldn`t you agree its probably better to not say anything? And given that behaviour more often than once, wouldn`t you agree that this might keep people who seriously engage in discussion from posting? I might think so, what do you think, Ansley?

what you say makes me remind of the fact when they forbid smoking in some countries and everybody was saying "oh gosh when people cant smoke anymore the business will be ruined" That wasn`t the case ,because MAYBE the people that stayed home because they could not endure all that smoke get out now and have fun? Statistics showed that the business of nightclubs was not ruined. Now they practice the same scneario in europe and the business has also not suffered. maybe its because people change, maybe its because people are more considerate, maybe its because some people get out who stayed at home first. No one knows. I do think that every person has a style that is unique and forbidding one quality does not make the other styles "better". So i`d stop short of agreeing with you on that one, Ansley, sorry. There are too many reasons and too many people out there posting or not posting for whatever reasons and maybe some have stopped posting that have not been noticed by you because of things YOU did? You never know that...;-) because maybe some of them are not Drama Queens but rather silent and just dissappear unnoticed? That is not meant as a rude post it was a hypothetical suggestion. I just made an example .

[London Rayne]

Originally Posted by Ansley

You are right we all don't agree with everything. But because of the lack of civility and consideration of others, people have stopped posting.

Thank you! Thing is, I can't control what someone else does...wow do I wish I could. I can't count the times people have been utterly rude and downright horrid with the things said to and about me, but I didn't run off like a 3 yr. old with a skinned knee because of it. I don't suggest anyone else do that either, but I certainly can't drag the posters back by the neck.

Some people simply don't have what it takes to be on the internet, much less a hooker board. I have said I was sorry on many occasions, and rarely have I ever gotten that in return. Some say what's on their mind while others hit the Report button.

[shorty]

Well a hooker board is not for a thin skinned person. However, you must respect the people that are on it.

[NinaBrooke]

dp

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by shorty

Well a hooker board is not for a thin skinned person. However, you must respect the people that are on it.

I`d say life generally is not for thin skinned people. But in real life are no mods to correct the vision either. So its best to practice in cyberspace for the real world, don`t you think? it might surprise you when you broaden your horizon on what wonderful surprises and gifts you get when you don`t have someone adjusting reality for you . Being a grown up is a tough thing.

[wildwooly1]

it all goes back to the old adage that u can catch more flies with honey than with flypaper...it only takes a little effort to be nice and a whole lot to be rude and arrogant.
just treat me the way you want to be treated and i would be happy so if someone wants to act an ass then they deserve to be treated like one and if you want respect treat others with respect..its that simple!!
and as far as earning respect thats bull you deserve it until you prove that you dont deserve it ..thats just like being innocent until proven guilty...lol

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by Bebe Le Strange

It has been my experience (in general) that the people who come across rude/mean or bullying on an internet chat board generally lack self esteem, and in real life avoid confrontation of any kind.

Oh i might challenge that experience of yours. I am certainly a person who is also rude in real life same like here (oh yes no need to bring me roses, i know, autographs later..... ) and i am in no way ever avoiding a confrontation. Ever.

I think i told you i am a political activist and i am not really hiding the fact i am an escort either. Then i am polyamorous and also active political on these things. So you are wrong in assuming because i am rude i lack self esteem and crawl in a hole when confrontations arise. Being authentic comes with confrontation. Everyone that knows me would say i am rather too confrontative than the other way round. My family knows i am an escort and so do my friends. And believe me i heard a lot of rude things about me and i had a lot of people who don`t want to be involved with me because of that. So being open and honest is not so easy. I think people who lead a double life are much rather the ones who avoid and sort of confrontation. I don`t do that. Maybe that is one of the reasons why i am a rude. I have learned to defend myself that way. I try to improve. Its good for me to improve and learn to be softer again.

But i have met people like the ones you mean too. But mostly its women pretending to be something they are not in reality. Like feminists when they have abusive relationships and stuff.

[shorty]

I actually find that cyberspace is more crude than real life. Most people that I associate with may voice there opinions but they won't force it. In the South, most people are nice and courteous. They tend to keep there opinions to themselves.

In cyberspace, people tend to get the courage to speak what's on their mind. They think the person on the other side of the computer doesn't have feelings or they just don't care. People seem to disrespect a person on a forum alot quicker than in real life. Only reason that I can figure is people aren't held accountable in cyberspace like they are in real life. Some of the things said in cyberspace would be cause for a good bitch slap or ass whopping in real life.