Sorry, multi-quoting isn't working worth a damn for me right now. Please excuse the clunkiness of my post.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trill Jackson
Given your line of work, why would you care if he cheated?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bambigirl
From the way I view it, if I was in a relationship and I was still providing...I would not feel like I was cheating on my partner. This is my job. This is no different, to me, than going to work for Corporate America. If you handle yourself as a provider professionally and look at this as a career, etc...then I don't find it the same as cheating. This would also mean that your partner would have to respect what you do and know that it is your line of work. With that being said, she is very right and entitled to care that her ex-partner cheated. Just my two cents, any way...  |
As an active provider who has had relationships while providing, I have to agree with what Bambi said; this is work and (to be honest) it doesn't feel like cheating because it's transactional in nature...if the hobbyists I see stopped putting money in they'd stop getting BCD attention out, crass though that may seem.
If I were to have uncompensated relations with anyone, then I could see the fellow feeling justified in seeing others. If I'm faithful outside of work, though, then I would expect monogamy from my partner in return.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trill Jackson
So an active provider would be upset if her BF cheated on her? What if the provider knows about it? I think anybody who dates a girl who "provides" should be able to see other people too, If not what's the benefit of dating a woman who bangs 3 different guys a day? How is that appealing?
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So, Trill, to me what your post says is that you don't
really see what we do as work...and you've also got some hints of slut-shaming going on in that bolded bit. (And not all of us see that many guys a day, though there isn't anything wrong with those who do.)
As the guys who've been fortunate enough to have a civvy relationship with me would attest, there are many benefits to being with a sex worker - we're independent, we know our bodies and our likes/dislikes, we damn sure know how to make a fellow happy and we take great pride in our appearance. We're also often well-read, interesting and pretty cool ladies, on the whole...hence why we're good at what we do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by anita
I would. Although, if this is how we meet, is he capable of being faithful?
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In my experience, no. I've tried relationships with both hobby and civvy guys and the bit I always kept coming back to with the hobbyists was...if he hid me from his SO, then what's to keep him from hiding someone from me? Add that to the craving for variety that most hobbyists have and it was a recipe for relationship paranoia. *shrugs*
Now, as to the OP.
There's no way in hell that I'd marry or (gods forbid) carry a fetus for a hobbyist.
I'm also uninterested in the marrying/childbirth aspect with civvies, though, so at least it's not based on what community they're part of.
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