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Old 02-17-2011, 05:38 PM   #46
FishGuy13
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LOL Love this thread!I sometimes carry a Kroger, Wal-mart or what ever just to look slick with a condom fresh dry socks and underware but it seems too many of the ladies I seen for a FBSM freak out over it. My thought is a guy with a purse diaper bad or luggage, just looks odd to say the least.
OH and the little white TP flecks too funny and have seen it, not on a provider but a WTF moment on an ex to say the least I was not sure what it was!
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Old 02-17-2011, 06:30 PM   #47
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Originally Posted by FishGuy13 View Post
LOL Love this thread!I sometimes carry a Kroger, Wal-mart or what ever just to look slick with a condom fresh dry socks and underware but it seems too many of the ladies I seen for a FBSM freak out over it. My thought is a guy with a purse diaper bad or luggage, just looks odd to say the least.
OH and the little white TP flecks too funny and have seen it, not on a provider but a WTF moment on an ex to say the least I was not sure what it was!
Maybe a briefcase would be a less conspicuous idea? Just a thought.
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Old 02-18-2011, 12:40 AM   #48
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Originally Posted by tracibrooks View Post
Maybe a briefcase would be a less conspicuous idea? Just a thought.
Depending upon where I go, a softside briefcase is typically part of my accessorizing. It allows me to carry those standard items you might need: lube, covers, etc. It will also accommodate a bottle of whatever and looks far less suspicious in a hotel lobby than a paper bag shaped like a bottle.




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Old 02-18-2011, 08:31 AM   #49
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I know there may be a nervous factor before coming to a first time appointment, but could ya remain somewhere within the legal limits before driving over to my place and stumbling up my stairs. While I may get a little silly having a glass or two of wine during our visit, I get to stay as long as I want and sober up a bit before getting behind the wheel again. Only had this happen once and called the guy a cab, but he left in his own vehicle anyway...worried the heck outta me.

If you have not been feeling well and are experiencing symptoms of illness the day of or the day before an appointment, for instance "shooting diarrhea", please do not bring it over to my place to share. I truly enjoy sharing, but that's a bit much! If you're gonna bring me something, I prefer a nice bottle of red wine or even better, let's share a naughty girl friend. xoxo
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Old 02-18-2011, 09:13 AM   #50
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10 girlie demerits to MAX for not being able to turn drunken projectile pooping into something funny......
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Old 02-18-2011, 09:21 AM   #51
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10 girlie demerits to MAX for not being able to turn drunken projectile pooping into something funny......
The drunken thing was too serious...I was very scared he might kill himself or someone else. He apologized when he got back with me the next day.

Are you shi**ing me? Having "Shooting Diarrhea" just ain't funny. At least not while it's going on...right? I suppose there are those who truly enjoy and get a giggle outta "shooting the poop".....LOL

Girlie Demerits? Yikes...are ya gonna deliver them personally?
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Old 02-18-2011, 09:21 AM   #52
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Originally Posted by M A X View Post
I know there may be a nervous factor before coming to a first time appointment, but could ya remain somewhere within the legal limits before driving over to my place and stumbling up my stairs. While I may get a little silly having a glass or two of wine during our visit, I get to stay as long as I want and sober up a bit before getting behind the wheel again. Only had this happen once and called the guy a cab, but he left in his own vehicle anyway...worried the heck outta me.

If you have not been feeling well and are experiencing symptoms of illness the day of or the day before an appointment, for instance "shooting diarrhea", please do not bring it over to my place to share. I truly enjoy sharing, but that's a bit much! If you're gonna bring me something, I prefer a nice bottle of red wine or even better, let's share a naughty girl friend. xoxo
LOL, I just love you, Max. I've never had the showing up drunk problem, but I have had the showing up sick problem! I got sick THREE times between December and January. Pretty certain it was due to clients showing up with the sniffles and giving me whatever was ailing them. Thanks guys!
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Old 02-18-2011, 09:43 AM   #53
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Well, the other side of the coin though is that three times between December and January, you may have passed on those same sniffles to other clients...

Kinda sucks to pass on those colds to our SO's though. If they only knew...
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Old 02-18-2011, 09:50 AM   #54
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Girlie Demerits? Yikes...are ya gonna deliver them personally?
The punishment is 2 demerits = 1 spanking. Unfortunately the ensuing fist fight over who would be the official girle disciplinarian left us short on volunteers.

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Old 02-18-2011, 09:56 AM   #55
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10 girlie demerits to MAX for not being able to turn drunken projectile pooping into something funny......
OK...here's a funny shooting poop link for ya, hon....sorry I couldn't come up with something better earlier, but remembered these and had to share:

Shooting Diarrhea

Sexy! NOT! LOL
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Old 02-18-2011, 10:08 AM   #56
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The punishment is 2 demerits = 1 spanking. Unfortunately the ensuing fist fight over who would be the official girle disciplinarian left us short on volunteers.

...awwww, I was gonna get my pink paddle all warmed up for ya.
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Old 02-18-2011, 06:24 PM   #57
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Traci - AMEN sista' preach on!!

Why make things complicated, for real.... Thats what Im sayin!!

Just because I'm single doesn't mean I am LOOKING for a boyfriend right now.
No offense, I just prefer not to date anyone whom I meet in the hobby. Yeah yeah yeah, pot calling the kettle black - I know.

[.....from another one of your posts..... pmd]
going on tampon runs to the store for me

XOXO
ItalianaPrincess
damn!!!!! i guess that i'll have to take that engagement ring back to Kay Jewelers :^( :^( :^(

btw, i never minded making tampon or midol runs for you :^)

seriously, i understand exactly what you are saying Italiana!!
there is a BIG WHITE LINE between any client and consultant, whether you want to believe it or not. and sometimes, one person can cross it innocently. and sometimes one person can cross it under false ideas. but it is there and should NOT be wiped away unilaterally.


here are some tips from me.

* pls dont schedule someone right after our appt. i know i need to skeedaddle after our consulting session is over, but i dont like being booted out the door cos your next client is walking up the sidewalk or down the hall. if i wanted to, i would have schedule a MFM w/ him and you. fortunately, this has only happened with less experienced consultants.

* if you appreciate little gifts, beverages, flowerss, etc., pls keep your showcase or p411 info up-to-date. one woman decided to swear off chocolates, but hadnt updated her prefs. she politely declined my gift of dark chocolate and almonds. i learned her new prefs and was rewarded on a future visit.

* during our consulting session, let's stick to the consulting topic. i've heard more hard luck stories, gripes, rants, errands that were or have to be run, family stories, stories of asshole boyfriends or exes, etc. than i definitely needed to hear or wanted to hear. they ARE NOT the kind of stimulation that my mind and body came to the session for.

great advice and lots of fun in this thread.

traci, a BIG hug, kiss and thank you from me to you for starting it!!!


[note to self: learn and memorize these when visiting consultants]
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Old 02-18-2011, 06:46 PM   #58
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Don't forget to get whip cream, strawberries and/or melted chocolate, so we can spread them on...things when I get there
Second, let me put it this way: If you were a woman, would you suck your wewe? If the answer is no then wash it more carefully so it is truly clean, smells fresh and makes you even more desirable
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Old 02-18-2011, 07:09 PM   #59
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Turn off the damned phones.
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