Sorry for your loss - been there unfortunately many times over the years - you are never ever "ready for it" and it just takes time There is a book out there that I found/find to be of great comfort in these times:
Goodbye, Friend: Healing Wisdom for Anyone Who Has Ever Lost a Pet Paperback – March 13, 2012, by Gary Kowalski (Author)
4.6 out of 5 stars - 228 customer reviews
my take is that regardless of how big/tough/strong one may be, the pain that one experiences when losing a loved one, is, for some time, all encompassing.
I wish you comfort from your memories and wellness and patience as you heal
RTHD
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