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whattaguy · 07-22-2011, 09:57 AM

Interesting conversation. I had a relationship with a provider for over a year and I knew what she did. Problem is we became very close and I'd be lying if I said it didn't start to bother me. Eventually, I completely supported her as a tradeoff for her to be exclusive with me. Bad idea in the long run.

Fortunately, we are good friends today. She's married with two kids and seems to have what she wants.

ax1971 · 07-22-2011, 10:44 AM

Call me daddy for 1 hour and I promise not to ask what you do for a living!

Anonymiss · 07-22-2011, 11:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by whattaguy

Interesting conversation. I had a relationship with a provider for over a year and I knew what she did. Problem is we became very close and I'd be lying if I said it didn't start to bother me. Eventually, I completely supported her as a tradeoff for her to be exclusive with me. Bad idea in the long run.

Fortunately, we are good friends today. She's married with two kids and seems to have what she wants.

I've actually heard this story many times over.

causewaycommuter · 07-22-2011, 12:21 PM

Tanner, keep in mind the audience you are proposing your question to. While we can argue the similarities & differences between providing in the hobby and sb/sd relationships, all of here don't have a problem with the hobby in general.

We are a small percent of the population. While many more people may not object to the hobby in philosophical terms, that objection may waver when faced with the realities of it (like when a potential sb tells him that she is a provider). I think the majority of men are still strongly connected to their inner neanderthal...meaning that they don't like the idea of their woman fooling around with other guys.

Yes that would be completely hypocritical for a guy to not like the idea of his sb banging a bunch of different guys. Especially when he is either married, has a SO, or is banging other girls. But I bet that is the mind set of a lot of the guys looking for a sb. Guys joke about never being able to understand what goes on between a girl's ears, but we're pretty scrambled up there too

So, back to your original question...Be honest. Just understand that some (maybe many) guys will have a problem, and some won't. My limited understanding of the entire sb/sd scene is that in order to have a successful relationship, there must be a certain level of honesty and trust to make it work. You come across as a very intelligent and genuine girl, I'm sure you would be able to find a guy who accepts your lifestyle and is a good match for you.

I usually say this to guys, but in your case it applies...

Happy hunting!

Taaka · 07-22-2011, 01:49 PM

Tanner, if you're ever slow, you don't have to be sad because of it....call me and I will do my best to fill that slow time for you!

Guest020312-2 · 07-22-2011, 03:40 PM

Thank you cc!! That is a point I didn't consider. I personally even when I date I really don't care who they bang (as long as I can join/watch). However, I know most men want to be all a lady needs and whatnot, which can be cute but being territorial to me shows you are unaware that you are awesome.

The only issue I have had when my sd knew I was a provider was him asking how much I made and comparing that to my "allowance". A client and an sd/sb relationship are much different to me. I don't text my clients regularly or really talk to them about things other than the appointments. I think a sd/sb relationship is much more intimate and can become emotional after time. I think once the emotions are there that is when one becomes jealous or has an issue with the other one having other partners.

Anonymiss · 07-22-2011, 03:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TabooTanner

The only issue I have had when my sd knew I was a provider was him asking how much I made and comparing that to my "allowance". A client and an sd/sb relationship are much different to me. I don't text my clients regularly or really talk to them about things other than the appointments.

Very true. This is a question where it's appropriate to express your discomfort in answering. Do you ask him how much he makes as "x" to weigh how much he should be giving you? Unless he feels as if he can double what you make for your exclusivity, this question is irrelevant imho. ... and some daddies can.

Guest020312-2 · 07-22-2011, 03:57 PM

I do well for myself and even if he could/did I would still be a provider. I love pleasing others and being "promiscuous". Being with only one person is no fun to me. I have never been in an exclusive relationship and don't plan on starting anytime soon.

causewaycommuter · 07-22-2011, 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TabooTanner

The only issue I have had when my sd knew I was a provider was him asking how much I made and comparing that to my "allowance". A client and an sd/sb relationship are much different to me. I don't text my clients regularly or really talk to them about things other than the appointments. I think a sd/sb relationship is much more intimate and can become emotional after time. I think once the emotions are there that is when one becomes jealous or has an issue with the other one having other partners.

From my perspective, if I had a sb and learned she is a provider I would definitely be interested in finding out what her regular rate is. I would hate to find out I've been played and paying more than the going rate. I hear what you are saying regarding how much more goes into a sb/sd relationship, and that no doubt has value. At the same time, providing some security and consistency to your cash flow also has value and should warrant some sort of "discount" for lack of a better word.

Again, this all depends on the sd. If I was filthy rich and the money didn't matter much to me (other than in principle) I wouldn't care what your going rate is nearly as much than if your allowance was a significant hit on my finances. But then again, if your allowance is a significant hit on my finances, then I probably shouldn't have a baby in the first place...or maybe a less expensive one.

Guest020312-2 · 07-22-2011, 05:27 PM

I honestly do not think I ask for much. Considering spending the night with someone (I would have sex with) on here is usually 1200 and upwards. And my SD expects that several nights a month. For less than 3000 a month. I don't only have a sd for the money reason but it more-so is a turn on to have someone giving me an allowance for being their dirty little girl.

If I told my SD that he could see me for 200 an hour but then had to leave and I couldn't send him pics/videos and talk to him everyday I don't think he would go for it. Sometimes I think he is a bit more "needy" than I am when it comes to the emotional parts.

whattaguy · 07-22-2011, 07:33 PM

TT, trust me when I tell you to be careful. As others have said, honesty is key. And, make sure you both have the same expectations. You seem exceptionally well grounded. Just use your good sense.

armydude · 07-22-2011, 07:56 PM

I'm confused. What is the problem here? if a client saw you on a sugar daddy site, just say "yes, I'm there looking for a sugar daddy." Whats the big deal? It's none of their business anyway. I know it's too rude to tell them to mind their own business, so just admit it and move on to doing your job they paid you for. I don't see why any client would make any issue of it. You escort to make money but I'm sure plenty of girls would love to meet a sugar daddy also. They're pretty much the same thing anyway.

armydude · 07-22-2011, 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TabooTanner

I honestly do not think I ask for much. Considering spending the night with someone (I would have sex with) on here is usually 1200 and upwards. And my SD expects that several nights a month. For less than 3000 a month. I don't only have a sd for the money reason but it more-so is a turn on to have someone giving me an allowance for being their dirty little girl.

If I told my SD that he could see me for 200 an hour but then had to leave and I couldn't send him pics/videos and talk to him everyday I don't think he would go for it. Sometimes I think he is a bit more "needy" than I am when it comes to the emotional parts.

Just make sure your sugar daddy doesn't start to take advantage of you. It sounds like alot of work. He gives you 3k and you spend several nights a month with him AND chat with him on the phone, texing, emails, video chat. Thats sounds so draining to me. My ATF was started off as a SB. We have become friendly in terms of her telling me what it was like. It sounds to me like all sugar dadies are the same. Give a lady 3k and get tons of time off them. Eventually my ATF gave it up and became an escort. More money for less work she says. Good luck :-)

dilbert firestorm · 07-22-2011, 08:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by armydude

I'm confused. What is the problem here? if a client saw you on a sugar daddy site, just say "yes, I'm there looking for a sugar daddy." Whats the big deal? It's none of their business anyway. I know it's too rude to tell them to mind their own business, so just admit it and move on to doing your job they paid you for. I don't see why any client would make any issue of it. You escort to make money but I'm sure plenty of girls would love to meet a sugar daddy also. They're pretty much the same thing anyway.

it shouldn't be confusing for you. its the other way round. the sugar daddy finding out that sugar baby's escorting on the side.

armydude · 07-23-2011, 02:12 AM

I guess I was confused because the title of this thread is:

"What to say when a client sees you on a sd/sb site"

I assumed she was talking about her clients she sees as an escort, who happened to see her on a SD/SB site. But for all I know she have several sugar daddies who she calls "clients." The word "client" is something escorts use for their johns. A sugar baby uses the term "sugar daddy" when referring to her sugar daddy. So thats why I was confused.