Welcome to ECCIE - Sign up today!

Ed Highlight · 03-25-2011, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brooke Wild

I love the thank you and I had a great time e-mails and text messages. They make me feel all warm and fuzzy.... Love it!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Naomi4u

Me too.

I am watching for more responses.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chica Chaser

Sounds like you handled that one perfectly to me. Message delivered, but in a respectful manner.

I'm not sure I would automatically jump to the wierdo conclusion however. The business we are in here is THE most personal and intimate activity two people can do together. Its also one that both parties willingly enter into. I think its a natural occurrance that feelings somewhat deeper than a typical business relationship can and will develop. Theres nothing wrong with allowing friendship to develop assuming there was a click between two people. Where your personal line is, is going to be in a different place for everyone. Hell, I have strong lasting friendships with many ladies I have seen.

Look, as CC said, you have just treated me to a wonderful and very intimate experience and I'm sorry, I'm gonna get a little mushy...that's the kind of guy I am...you are going to get the "Thank You" note and the "I'm thinking of you note" because I had a wonderful time and in between visits, I'm thinking of you!! AND I want you to know that I'm looking forward to next time....If you like me, you'll appreciate the thoughfulness and you'll return the sentiment of looking forward to next time (that is unless you're not - then that's a different story)....Anyway, wouldn't you prefer the "Thank You" note instead of a slap on the backside and me saying "nice job"!?!?

I guess I'll just apologize in advance, but you're getting a "Thank You" note......

Guest101811-4 · 03-25-2011, 03:19 PM

Anyone know how to recall an email in Outlook?

j/k

Naomi4u · 03-25-2011, 03:20 PM

I must say I am a bit old fashioned when it comes to this stuff. A thank you email does absolutely nothing for me. I will most likely delete it or send it to my spam folder. Now a thank you handwritten letter mailed to my hobby p.o.box says A LOT. There is something about a guy taking time out to write a thank you letter that really turns me on.

Ed Highlight · 03-25-2011, 03:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Naomi4u

I must say I am a bit old fashioned when it comes to this stuff. ... Now a thank you handwritten letter mailed to my hobby p.o.box says A LOT. There is something about a guy taking time out to write a thank you letter that really turns me on...

I'm going to the Post Office to buy stamps....right friggin' NOW!!

rrabbit6926 · 03-25-2011, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by incognito isis

Brooke Wild, I love the "thank you" emails also! My favorites are the ones who say: "thank you for an amazing time last night. You are beautiful, sexy and smart too. I will definitely be making more appointments with you in the future!"

NOT......

I miss you, where are you? helloooo, hellooooo, are you there? What are you doing? Whats up? I miss you, helloooo.....are you ignoring me? Why aren't you emailing me back? Are you mad at me? I miss you....helloo....where are you? What, this was just a job to you?? Don't you like me?

Sounds like some stalker issues. The guys need to realize that this is a business and if she made you feel special she did her job we'll, and leave it at that. Hopefully he'll book again and want to expericance another good time.

incognito isis · 03-25-2011, 03:26 PM

Ed, I don't know how to answer that. Except to say, there is a happy medium. No, I don't want to be slapped on the backside with a "thanks now get out" type of thank you. But I also don't want the "I miss you, where are you" b.s. either. A nice thank you, a few compliments, and a reference to our next "appointment" is what I think most women prefer. Again, find the happy medium. Be nice, be sentimental, give compliments, but remember this is our job and you met us on a escort site not match dot com.......

Speaking of match dot com....I usually tell the clingy ones who are shocked this is just a job to me, I say: Sir, you met me on an escort site, not match dot com, remember?

Ed Highlight · 03-25-2011, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by incognito isis

Ed, I don't know how to answer that. Except to say, there is a happy medium. ... A nice thank you, a few compliments, and a reference to our next "appointment" is what I think most women prefer. Again, find the happy medium. Be nice, be sentimental, give compliments.......

It's called keeping things in perspective.....that's one of those things us older guys have going for us....manners, sentiment and perspective.

(I can't believe I just called myself an older guy....geez)

Guest031213-03 · 03-25-2011, 03:41 PM

Some guys will even get upset when they see a review written from another man also. It's like they expect to be the only man in your life after a visit and get offended when you don't want to carry on with an unprofessional relationship. They may start to insist on seeing you with no donation to your time, too. Early signs of this behavior could be emails, phone calls or texts such as the one she mentioned. It's best to nip it in the bud asap and keep the air clear. I still think you handled the situation nicely. It's a compliment that he had such a great time but there is a line that shouldn't be crossed by the guy.

Guest101811-4 · 03-25-2011, 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ed Highlight

It's called keeping things in perspective.....that's one of those things us older guys have going for us....manners, sentiment and perspective.

(I can't believe I just called myself an older guy....geez)

Completely agree, Ed.

I entered into this knowing full well what these encounters truly meant. I'm quite happy, to be honest, to have struck a good balance with the wonderful Oklahoma ladies I've had the distinct pleasure of meeting.

Additionally, I entered this for some variation in my sex life. Why would I want to tie myself down to one provider? Hell, I got that at home. LOL

incognito isis · 03-25-2011, 03:54 PM

Ed, the older fellas tend to have their perspective in order. It's the younger guys who tend to be out of touch....I have no idea why that is. Except to make a reference to the fact that age is wisdom.

I want to explain the story behind starting this thread. I met a fella back in October. He was 34 and a newby. We met and we did get along quite well. The next day he emailed me like crazy, I responded etc. ect. this is my job etc. etc.

To make a long story short, it was obvious he wanted to date me. I told him that he had only 2 choice:

1. He could continued seeing me for intimacy but only with appointment$$$

or....

2. We could be platonic friends only. No sex, no flirting, no NSA sex, no friends with benefits. Nothing JUST FRIENDS!

He took offer #2. So we agreed to be friends. BIG MISTAKE. I'm not a dummy. And in time he was tying to use our "friendship" to enter a relationship with me,which is WHAT I TOLD HIM WE COULD NEVER DO!!! I told him over and over, we can't date. He ended up hurt. This was a big mistake on my part. I should have never agreed to any friendship with this man. Never. It's never good to lead anyone on. Especially when they are already mislead to begin with. True, I made it clear no relationship would ever transpire from the beginning. But did I really need the hassle of being friends with a crushy client?? Um, no. This brings up another issue, to be friends or not?

Not to get off topic, but those thank you letters can really indicate the state of mind of these clients. You live and learn. Sometimes the hard way. I admit, I'm too nice and I hate hurting anyones feelings. To the clingy crushers, yes I admit this is my job, but to lessen the blow I've also half heatedly offered platonic friendships. Thats a bad idea also. When do you say....THIS. IS. MY. JOB.

Guest101811-4 · 03-25-2011, 03:56 PM

Sometimes the truth hurts, but it hurts a lot less if it comes out early rather than later.

burkalini · 03-25-2011, 04:19 PM

If you think your going to start a relationship then you might want to try another hobby.

pickupkid · 03-25-2011, 04:45 PM

It starts off with questions like this: http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?...ith+a+provider and the fantasy begins..and thus a situation like yours

Chevalier · 03-25-2011, 04:49 PM

As often as this complaint is aired, I'm surprised it continues to happen frequently. Most of us figured out a long time ago that even if she values and appreciates us as a client, and even if there's some degree of connection (it's still a job, but not just a job), we don't intrude further without a clear invitation. I really like some of the ladies I've seen, and some may even really like me, but nothing happens outside the appointment (maybe an infrequent email to say hi but even that's rare) unless she initiates it. Anyone who doesn't understand all this probably : (a) has emotional problems; or (b) is a manipulator, interested in free sex more than he's interested in you. If he doesn't take a hint, go ahead and be brutal; you may lose a client, but do you really want those guys as clients??

For that matter, in the civilian dating arena, how did you handle guys you went out with who called or emailed too frequently afterward, if you really weren't interested in them? Both sides of the aisle learn coping techniques for that problem. (Well, I never had to deal with it . . . .) Same principles should apply, I would think.

Quote:

Originally Posted by incognito isis

the fact that age is wisdom

"Wisdom comes with old age, but sometimes old age comes alone."

Chevalier · 03-25-2011, 05:04 PM

By the way, do you notice a difference in the likelihood of this occurring depending on whether the client is, or is not, a member (and more than an infrequent lurker) of a board like this? I suspect that reading boards like this helps clients keep his emotions on an even keel and not read more into the BCD than was really there. But that's just a suspicion/theory.