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Old 02-11-2014, 10:16 AM   #16
Lea Madisson
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Two points:

When I actually use employment verification, I do it in a number of ways. If there is a concern of discretion, I explain that discretion is important to both of us. My reputation is such that I MUST keep things to myself... such as personal info. I also tell the guy to check around about my reliability. Sometimes it is good enough for the guy, sometimes not... but I have to stick to my policy.

As for calling the place of business, I simply ask for the gentleman by name. IF they ask who I am, I just tell them its Lea from "Such and Such company... usually a company I pick that would be doing business with whoever I am calling. I also have a made up company name. I never ever tell them what the call is about and I never say its employment verification!!!

Then, when they transfer me, I just simply hang up.

Smooch!

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Old 02-11-2014, 02:02 PM   #17
GypsyHeart
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The problem with gimme's post is that not all newbie friendly girls are considered to be a good reference by some of the others. And a dinner meet is not any indication to how someone is BCD. Even with the references of newbie friendly ladies you still might need to jump through hoops for that one lady you really want to see.
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Old 02-11-2014, 06:57 PM   #18
Arverni
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gimme_that View Post
Employment verification is just a clever way to blackmail you later in case her money or business gets slow.

Choose wisely. You might get lucky and find one who wont.......
Blackmail you with what?

"Hey your guy paid me for sex!"

What's your boss gonna do? Fire you over a call from a crazy woman? What proof does she have? "Hey boss - I thought I had a stalker and there's proof of it!"

Problem solved.

If I were a provider and wanted to blackmale a guy - I'd just get his real name and phone number - and research the internet for the rest - then go to his WIFE.

I mean seriously Gimme ... why do you even hobby if you're this jaded about the women in this business?

EDIT: I just have to ad that I WAS a "boss" for an organization - well, like #3 in the organization when the "big boss" called me into her office one day. One of my guys had an ex-girlfriend who wrote a letter to her (my boss was a "she") and dayam ... you should have seen all the shit she alleged in that letter. She said the guy got his jollies from taking her out in the swamp and chaining her to his jeep and urinating on her. She admitted this conduct was consensual.

It didn't impact him AT ALL. What were we gonna do? Call his wife and tell her? Immediate lawsuit even if we had wanted to. Fire him? On what evidence and grounds? Immediate lawsuit had we tried.

Hell - the only thing I said to the guy was ... "FYI your old girlfriend wrote a letter to the big boss - it's none of our business and it won't impact you at all".

Even if she had alleged rape - we couildn't have done anything about it without risking litigation from him. Our action would have been to write the woman back and tell her to report the details to the police.

Businesses don't like to get involved in these things - they don't like to be policemen. Those that do quickly find themselves in court.
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Old 02-11-2014, 07:23 PM   #19
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I agree with Gimmie to some extent.You open yourself up giving up that information to ladies.I did a few times and I regret it.Being a lady on this board or around for awhile does not mean she will be a professional and no problems will occur.I have had a bad experience myself,it was not blackmail but it made me uncomfortable.It was not a backpage or craglist lady but lady on the board.
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Old 02-12-2014, 07:33 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by browntiger View Post
I agree with Gimmie to some extent.You open yourself up giving up that information to ladies.I did a few times and I regret it.Being a lady on this board or around for awhile does not mean she will be a professional and no problems will occur.I have had a bad experience myself,it was not blackmail but it made me uncomfortable.It was not a backpage or craglist lady but lady on the board.
What happened?
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Old 02-13-2014, 02:00 PM   #21
Annie Calhoun
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gimme_that View Post
Employment verification is just a clever way to blackmail you later in case her money or business gets slow.

Choose wisely. You might get lucky and find one who wont.......

Thanks for spreading misinformation that makes it all the more difficult for us to keep ourselves safe.

In the hobbying world, we are significantly more vulnerable than you are. Employment verification is a simple request for proof that you are who you say you are. Once we know your real name, we can do a little internet sleuthing to see if you're, say, a convicted rapist.

But God forbid we're allowed to know a damn thing about the stranger we're about to meet with alone. I mean, if we dare to bring a friend to wait in the car *just in case*, you cry pimp. If we ask to screen you, we're doing it so that we can blackmail you later (Really? For fuck's sake, we're real people--we have better things to do than meticulously file away your employer's contact info with the intent to commit felony extortion/blackmail in the far-flung future.). I gather we're just supposed to blindly trust you....because that has NEVER resulted in a provider being robbed, raped, assaulted, or murdered, right?

As someone who is very newbie-friendly, most of my screening is done by employment verification. And I've had very, very few potential clients object to it.

Why? Because my clients respect my need for safety and discretion as much as I respect theirs.

And, like anyone with an ounce of sense, they understand that a provider so unconcerned with her own safety that she's willing to risk it for a buck is probably NOT prioritizing her clients' safety, either.


PS: I've posted this all over, but I feel like a lot of clients probably need a little clarification on WHY we do employment verification: My Screening Practices Explained, Part 1 (Employment Verification)
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Old 02-13-2014, 03:37 PM   #22
gimme_that
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie Calhoun View Post
In the hobbying world, we are significantly more vulnerable than you are.
Ill give you that but so are we.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie Calhoun View Post
As someone who is very newbie-friendly, most of my screening is done by employment verification. And I've had very, very few potential clients object to it........

Why? Because my NEW (no reference) clients respect my need for safety and discretion as much as I respect theirs. But I'll be damned if I give this client my real name in a show of mutual respect and discretion to check for recent arrest and such just as I do him.......but that's where the supposed mutual respect I speak of so eloquently stops lol
Fixed that for ya.

Yes I agree.......... your new clients who don't have refrences will respect your policy because they have to or they won't get any potential safe interactions without a start reference which is the general purpose you are serving. They have no choice so they will expose their poker hand and fold accordingly. Begging, hoping, and catering to your every requests for your consideration. They have no choice thay must submit or tapout to your mixed martial arts screening.

But for guys who do have references, but they don't opt to provide their name or work info.........is this really necessary? Or do you just do that for newbies. Let's clarify here.....this is what I mean specifically. If I have refs and since I'm not new.....you will not get my name or work info.....just my refs.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie Calhoun View Post
Employment verification is a simple request for proof that you are who you say you are. Once we know your real name, we can do a little internet sleuthing to see if you're, say, a convicted rapist.
Can we do the same on you to check for recent arrest?

No you say. God forbid if we know your truely safe.......

Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie Calhoun View Post
I mean, if we dare to bring a friend to wait in the car *just in case*, you cry pimp.
Your damn skippy. Or his bottom bitch is dropping the girls off for their calls.

On the same token though......if your client was dropped off in a car......and the guy parked in your hotel parking lot as your client walked up to your hotel incall......would you consider this a risk or a safety advantae for your client? You would probably think he would have a session then run out with your money....or work as a team with the guy in car and they both rob ou when he opens the door for him right.

Maybe you the provider.....not you speciafically....but provider who has a driver.....coordinates with her driver to have the client drop his drawers and turn off a light when its safe for the driver to come in hotel and rob him. Scenarios.......


Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie Calhoun View Post
If we ask to screen you, we're doing it so that we can blackmail you later (Really? For fuck's sake, we're real people--we have better things to do than meticulously file away your employer's contact info with the intent to commit felony extortion/blackmail in the far-flung future.). I gather we're just supposed to blindly trust you....because that has NEVER resulted in a provider being robbed, raped, assaulted, or murdered, right?
I don't think that most ladies would try to screw guys over......but some ladies will use this tactic. You don't know what you are capable of if the right scenarios are affected because you won't divulge what you know. For all I know your custody of your kids could be affected if you don't reveal my name or where I work.........

And I'm sure guys have never been robbed, assualted, threatened or maimed by providers and their pimps......



Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie Calhoun View Post
And, like anyone with an ounce of sense, they understand that a provider so unconcerned with her own safety that she's willing to risk it for a buck is probably NOT prioritizing her clients' safety, either.

So your saying that providers who screen client by only using references and confirming them are not screening for safety right. So if the client won't get you his name or work info.....and only many references......do you reject those provider references if they don't know his real name and work info.....or are you just doing this for newbies? If your doing this for newbies I agree....but I definitely would tell a newbie explore all options before exposing your livelihood.

My beef is mosly if the guys has refs.....and they are legit....I see no reason for you to know a name or work info. Its ur discretion obviously........but that's overkill.
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Old 02-13-2014, 05:24 PM   #23
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Gimme - when was the last time a "john" was ass-raped by hooker?

Or - when was the last time one was tortured, killed, and cut up and thrown in the Gulf?

This shit happens to the girls.

Besides - you get better service from the girls if they feel at ease with you.

References don't always cut it. There's no guarantee that a guy who's perfectly fine with one girl will be okay with another. Also - a lot of escorts don't do references and some actually give shitty references. There's been some incidents of guys causing problems who were screened with references - it's just that the girls who "referred" them either "misremembered" they guy - or just said "yeah he's fine" ... when obviously he wasn't.

And the girls make the rules - so there's that. You can't get into my bar wearing a "hoodie". You can sea-lawyer me all day at the door - I'm still telling you that you can't get in wearing it. You either remove it - or go the fuck home (or someplace else). If you don't want to give out your personal info - that's fine and that's your right ... but trying to argue the point as if you've been an escort all your life and KNOW what these gals do is kind of stupid. No - it's not "kind of" - it's downright stupid - and it shows a lack of respect for their business and the way they choose to run it.
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Old 02-13-2014, 06:01 PM   #24
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Let me just add that - I saw a girl once and I asked her what info she wanted from me and she replied "just give me your name and phone number".

I almost didn't see her. I probably shouldn't have.

Reason? A girl who screens well is less likely to end up a statistic. If you see a girl and she ends up being one of those that gets cut up and thrown in the Gulf - bank on the fact that LE will leave no stone unturned in trying to find all her previous clients. That means you may get a knock on the door and questioned pretty hard.

Guys bitch about chicks who are druggies, or are pimped, or are ripoffs. Those are usually desperate girls and desperate girls take all comers (no pun intended) and tend to short the screening process.

Sign of a quality girl is how well she screens. It's another way for YOU to screen her.
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Old 02-13-2014, 10:02 PM   #25
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I think you kind sir are in the minority of hobbyists. Those of which that prefer to divulge there name and work info last four of your social, blood type, etc and anything else providers may ask of you with no trepidation. I see no need for this info if a guy has multiple references. I'm sure there are many clients who agree with me. There are many providers too who will agree.

And yes ladies make their own preferences. But we haven't got confirmation yet from this particular one if she is doing this both for newbies and future clients who aren't newbies. If she is getting the majority or all her client to divulge there work info more power to her.......I'm just saying I wouldn't and definitely suggest others don't to their own demise.

Just on aspd prior to it closing....there was a local provider there who listed names, email address, and phone numbers online of all the guys she saw before leaving the hobby due to other issues she had. She had rave reviews prior to that outing by multiple verified members.....some who still post on this site. So yes it happens and it will happen.

Your only as vulnerable to this stuff as the info you lend out.

And provider references can be annoying as hell for some ladies. If the lady has given the guy an ok and she has confirmed seeing him and says he's a nice guy with no issues......besides a description if necessary.....what does she need to know. Pointers on his favorite sex acts perhaps,dick tips, etc. Some of these ladies go overboard when they talk to your references and you would be surprised what some of those ladies ask.....very unnecessary questions to.
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Old 02-13-2014, 10:24 PM   #26
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quote---Sign of a quality girl is how well she screens. It's another way for YOU to screen her.

my friend you are a WISE man!
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Old 02-14-2014, 04:10 PM   #27
Arverni
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Originally Posted by gimme_that View Post
I think you kind sir are in the minority of hobbyists. Those of which that prefer to divulge there name and work info last four of your social, blood type, etc and anything else providers may ask of you with no trepidation.
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Old 02-14-2014, 06:13 PM   #28
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Your preaching to a deaf choir, do yourself a favor and don't bother responding. Why waste keystrokes on someone with a poor outlook on women in general, when you could be keystroking your info to a quality provider.
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Old 02-14-2014, 09:52 PM   #29
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I don't agree with Gimme that much, but I think dudes are nuts for providing employment info to providers. It might be different for a single guy working at a bar or a blue collar site where playing with prostitutes might actually build cred. But a married guy working a corporate job? It could easily become very embarrassing or worse.

Given one corporate phone number, it's not too difficult to find other numbers and email addresses. If you have coworkers that know your family, or whose kids know your kids... I don't see positives on providing that info.

Participating in this hobby has inherent risks for all parties. I can't see guys adding unnecessary risk.

Start with newbie-friendly providers and work your way up the chain. It could take a while, but it's worth it in the long run.
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Old 02-15-2014, 02:26 PM   #30
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Newbie friendly providers do not necessarily mean no screening. I have screened lots of guys for their first date and it involves employment verification. I understand being wary; I would be too. More because of a six degrees of separation kind of thing, rather than blackmail. I have never heard of that happening. I suppose it could, but seems unlikely. Here's what I would do if I were a gentlemen. Either join p411 where you will have to be verified by Gina, et al, and probably the by the first provider you see on there. Once you get your first okay, you should be good to go by most ladies standards without further need to release personal information. Or, find a provider on here who is well known and has a stellar reputation. You can be assured that the woman is not going to ruin her business by using your information for spurious reasons and then you can use the weight of her reputation for a great reference. For me, one reference from a lady who has been around a while is enough. Other ladies have different criteria, but I think a reference from say a very reputable provider will make most of the ladies feel safe enough to see you without further, more invasive screening. At any rate, good luck.
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