* + * FALLING IN LOVE WITH CLIENTS/PROVIDERS? * + *

[Guest082413-1]

Originally Posted by Tracey P

Yes, I have have had clients fall in love (infatuation). What I have learned from the ordeals of the past is that the provider plays a very important role in the situation. Ladies need to learn what they want (or dont want) and be CLEAR to the gentleman. Honesty is the best policy. This means no confusing mixed signals or manipulation. When its clear that a man's emotions are getting involved, it is not fair to be any less than honest with him. For a provider to say, "I dont know WHY he keeps bothering me! Hes stalking me!" is a little...irresponsible. Dont lead him on in the first place! Say what you mean and mean what you say....But easy for me to say... Hindsight is 20/20

Tracey P,

A very good point, indeed! I must say, I ignore those who are infatuated and don't feed into infatuation. There is a clear difference between love and infatuation. Several of my clients are infatuated which accounts for repeat clientele, but others have claimed their love for me. His (the gentleman who spend 24 hours with me in Los Angeles) current situation prevents him from going to the next step, which is safe for both of us, but if he were single, he'd probably want to spend the rest of his life with me. He uses the "L" word often.

I thank you for noting the irresponsibility of girls who can't quite seem to set parameters or limits on men. I couldn't agree more!

xo

Angelina

[jon5150]

I myself have had 2 longterm relationships with providers. I would go so far as to say it was a sd/sb thing as I am in no way rich and couldn't afford that, but u could say I was a super-regular. The first was real good. We were and still are good friends. We had a fantastic sexual thing going but the deep emotions never really came into play. It was very much a "friends with benifits" situation. Sadley she had to move. The second is not as uncomplicated. At first the boundries were clear, then the line started getting blurry. Personal lives start to bleed thru to biz side of it. And I know how I felt but she was much harder to read. I would think to myself "do I really matter to her?" "does she get this personal with other clients or am I really that special to her?" She said she really cares but is this just to keep my buisness or is it real? It's a blurry, blurry line. In the end, every situation is different and unique and hard to define. Well, that's just my 2 cents.

[Guest082413-1]

The blurry line is a scary place. From past experience, when I fall in love, I would never expect anything financial from the gentleman I have fallen in love with. The tricky part is that when a former client knows what you do and accepts it while tending to his own complicated situation, the fuzzy line gets in the way. I guess, it was easier when he was a client because it felt like I was respected more and compensated. Now, I feel like I am feeding his ego and find that I am a bit jaded by it all. I just feel like moving far, far away and never looking back. It's hard.

When I find the man who I am destined to spend the rest of my life with, I will abandon the hobby for good. I want a man who appreciates me, surprises me, buys me flowers unexpectedly, never walks ahead of me and a man who never undermines my intelligence. Sometimes men don't realize what they have until that woman leaves.

Thank you for sharing your story. I hope you find a sugar-babie who appreciates you. I know that the smallest things make me happy, like when my clients in their twenties (yes, some of my clients are just babies) buy me flowers and small gifts. It must be nice to spoil a girl and surprise her.

Originally Posted by jon5150

I myself have had 2 longterm relationships with providers. I would go so far as to say it was a sd/sb thing as I am in no way rich and couldn't afford that, but u could say I was a super-regular. The first was real good. We were and still are good friends. We had a fantastic sexual thing going but the deep emotions never really came into play. It was very much a "friends with benifits" situation. Sadley she had to move. The second is not as uncomplicated. At first the boundries were clear, then the line started getting blurry. Personal lives start to bleed thru to biz side of it. And I know how I felt but she was much harder to read. I would think to myself "do I really matter to her?" "does she get this personal with other clients or am I really that special to her?" She said she really cares but is this just to keep my buisness or is it real? It's a blurry, blurry line. In the end, every situation is different and unique and hard to define. Well, that's just my 2 cents.

[txtraveler07]

Originally Posted by Angelina Adams

Thank you for sharing your story. I hope you find a sugar-babie who appreciates you. I know that the smallest things make me happy, like when my clients in their twenties (yes, some of my clients are just babies) buy me flowers and small gifts. It must be nice to spoil a girl and surprise her.

I enjoy it, especially when it's for someone who obviously appreciates it. The way a girl smiles when she gets an unexpected gift is uniquely beautiful. Like others have said, I'm sure you'll find the guy you're looking for - you've got plenty to offer any guy smart enough to notice.

Sorry, I don't have my own story to add.

[rekcaSxT]

Have you enjoyed that Tequila I brought you last???

[Fast Gunn]

Originally Posted by Exotic Lily

I had a long term arrangement with a client that lasted 4yrs (2003-2007) and he fell deeply in love with me. I loved him dearly but wasn't 'in love' with him because I couldn't accept the fact that it was a long term paid arrangement. I finally had to end it when I retired late 2007. Now that i've returned after 2.5yrs, he has contacted me recently wanting to resume it... this has me wondering... do men ever really fall out of love?

Do you think, you might be, I mean, just a bit, a bit conceited?

[RickO'shayRabbitt]

I think we men do not fall out of love with those women we loved when THEY broke up with us. Of course, we get over it, but we always keep those feelings to one degree or another. I think we also remain in love with those with whom we ended the relationship because of some external force--whether it be one of us moving; one wanting kids and the other didn't, etc.

Now, if we broke up with them because they began to turn us off, the answer is "No". We don't stay in love with them. More than anything, we are just glad to be rid of them.

[Guest082413-1]

Originally Posted by txtraveler07

I enjoy it, especially when it's for someone who obviously appreciates it. The way a girl smiles when she gets an unexpected gift is uniquely beautiful. Like others have said, I'm sure you'll find the guy you're looking for - you've got plenty to offer any guy smart enough to notice.

Sorry, I don't have my own story to add.

TxTraveler07:

I must say, you always surprise me with bouquets of roses and cooking small courses for me. I feel genuinely loved, appreciated and respected by you. I also feel the essence of being a true lady when I am with you. You are half the age (maybe one third) of the person I am referring to and at times, I think that the way you treat women, at least me in particular, should be written in a book for the older men to follow.

I just got your text messages and for some reason my texts keep cutting off. I need to clear the cache.

xo

Angelina

[Guest082413-1]

Originally Posted by rekcaSxT

Have you enjoyed that Tequila I brought you last???

rekcaSxT:

The silver tequila was amazing....I believe I just finished the bottle a few days ago. Like TxTraveler07, you never fail to surprise. The gift card you purchased me warmed my heart. I am the type of girl who responds well to surprises and I always want to feel appreciated. Who doesn't? I have so much of my love and my heart to give and when some people undermine me, I feel no desire or ability to remain in the relationship (client or non-client).

I am thankful to have friends like you and TxTraveler07.

xo

Angelina

[Guest082413-1]

Originally Posted by barneyrubble

I think we men do not fall out of love with those women we loved when THEY broke up with us. Of course, we get over it, but we always keep those feelings to one degree or another. I think we also remain in love with those with whom we ended the relationship because of some external force--whether it be one of us moving; one wanting kids and the other didn't, etc.

Now, if we broke up with them because they began to turn us off, the answer is "No". We don't stay in love with them. More than anything, we are just glad to be rid of them.

A very good point, Barney. After my last relationship two years ago, I sensed infedility and my fears were confirmed. I then decided to become a "naughty girl" and did a complete "180". I then quit my job which used my intelligence, but didn't pay so I became a stripper, danced and swam the escort waters. I used my brain in the "naughty world" to build business connections and was compensated with great money. I know my ex-boyfriends still love me and I have my clever methods of determining their continued infatuation. I still care about them, too, but it wasn't meant to be. It could be the force of overall power of my touch, words and memories that have paralyzed them in some way....never forgetting me.

I enjoy meeting new gentlemen, but my reasons for entering the hobby derived from a broken heart......maybe that is why I have so much love to give....

[guest041110]

Originally Posted by barneyrubble

I think we men do not fall out of love with those women we loved when THEY broke up with us. Of course, we get over it, but we always keep those feelings to one degree or another. I think we also remain in love with those with whom we ended the relationship because of some external force--whether it be one of us moving; one wanting kids and the other didn't, etc.
...

Hmm... interesting perspective barneyrubble. I will disagree on the never falling out of love since I made the mistake of falling in love with a provider who then did what she could to prove she had lied about telling me she was in love with me before I had told her. My ex-wife, who is a very good woman, I will always love but never will I be in love with her again. After being with someone for 25+ years, there are some things that go beyond words and a relationship like I had is one of those things even if I was the one that ended the marriage. In both cases, I am not anywhere near being in love with either of them but for different reasons.

In my experience, guys will have affection for those that we once were in love with, like I do for my ex wife, and may even continue to love the women despite the bad those women may do to them. In my case, while I did not do the first actions in severing the relationship with the provider I alluded to above I did walk away from her and I am thankful I did. I do care about her because I have compassion and I realize people are flawed beings who make mistakes but I will not allow myself to love her ever again because of the kind of person she has shown me she is.

Unrequited love is best left alone rather than being a dish served cold as some like the provider I alluded to would do to those who were in love with her. It is hard to deal with your feelings however, the following quote is what both sides need to remember when dealing with their emotions especially when they are in love because love is strong but it cannot survive in a vacuum.

Love is strong yet delicate.
It can be broken.
To truly love is to understand this.
To be in love is to respect this.
- Stephen Packer -

Originally Posted by barneyrubble

...
Now, if we broke up with them because they began to turn us off, the answer is "No". We don't stay in love with them. More than anything, we are just glad to be rid of them.

On this point, I am in complete agreement with you. A different provider who I was very briefly involved with in a non-P4P relationship had such issues that when I walked away from her, I never looked back. As a matter of fact for the first time in my life, I did not just walk away but I ran as fast as I could away from that person. Ugh!

[bviguy]

This is a GREAT discussion! Falling in Love? I don't know; I'm a married...and pretty happily married hobbyist. Now, do I think of a couple of my favorite providers a close friends...buddies...you bet. Intimacy with them is intimate on several levels but is is also rollicking, laughing-out-loud FUN!!! This said, I also know, from a business perspective, what these ladies are selling is their TIME, first and foremost. I can sit and talk for hours and that's unfair to them. My favs...my friends....have been more than generous with their bodies and their time. The least I can do is is return the favor, when I am with them and when I am not.

[Exotic Lily]

Originally Posted by Fast Gunn

Do you think, you might be, I mean, just a bit, a bit conceited?

Not at all because i'm smart enough to know he wasn't looking for love.... rather lust. I can honestly say he is back in my life simply because i've never fallen in love with him.... i've been a wife and it's much more fun being a mistress.

[Exotic Lily]

Originally Posted by Angelina Adams

I choose not to have a boyfriend outside of the hobby as I view everything as a financial transaction, which is indeed sad on many levels. If I don't feel compensated, I leave.

No my darling it is not sad by any means.... in my opinion you are a true Courtesan.

[bviguy]

This really is a fascinating conversation. In LOVE with a provider? Probably not. I'm a married...pretty happily married...hobbiest. Do I consider some of my favorite providers, especially one or two...very close friends? Sure. What I try to keep in mind, though, is this: At the end of the day, friends share time together and what my provider "friends" ultimately sell is, well, time. For me to occupy their time beyond our transaction, in a very real way, violates our friendship. I have helped one out financially out beyond the transactional relationship but nothing more than I would have helped any other friend. No strings attached and I expect nothing back in return. There will be an envelope on the vanity at the beginning of my next visit.