I have a friend like you that I met before I was a provider. He was being taken advantage of in the SB/SD world so I introduced him to the hobby. He is conscientious of other's time and relatively generous so that makes a difference in being a "tire-kicker" or not.
So far I introduced him to two ladies and I believe he has also a met a few through them as well. Point is, if you get in and network with a group of ladies who know you aren't just taking advantage of their kind-nature and really appreciate that "build-up" then you can still have a good time in the hobby.
The goal, as always, is mutual respect, understanding and boundaries. Yes your situation is a bit more involved than just an hour here or there but if you are genuinely interested, shoot me a pm outlining your physical preferences and I might be able to recommend a few ladies.
Either way, good luck hitting off some "out of the box ideas" (joke not lost there).