Only because it’s been slow in here and I’m tired of the drama. Total off the wall question that may or may not be inappropriate. And please be honest. Most of us are human with the exception of a few trolls!

[ZantannaParella]

Originally Posted by Bankshot

Hey ZP, I guess that gives new meaning to GFE.

Well there is GFE and TOTAL GFE. Total is where I fart burp and poop and I have an old shirt with holes in it and the boxers from who I am seeing. Than I get in bed. Scratch my ass and say bot tonight babe. I have a headache.

Let me know if you’re interested. Role play The real girlfriend Scenario is extra

[ZantannaParella]

Originally Posted by ajlybj

What a funny topic and I whole heartedly agree - equal farting rights for providers and clients!

Now, when it comes to me personally, if I can feel it coming then I’ll beg your pardon, or take my leave to the bathroom. But if it happens out of the blue then it is what it is. I would expect similar consideration from a provider.

If you have an upset stomach all bets are off. You can’t tell if it’s a one off, a bug, food poisoning, or whatever. I would explain the situation and beg my leave if it occurs in session. If it occurs before I would call and explain the situation and rebook. Likewise if it’s the provider and before a session, simply rebook. If during a session then I would prefer the provider stop and do whatever she needs to get well. Life happens so no point crying over it. The provider can then make a decision, when better, what if any, follow-up action is required. After all, we’re adults, we know that being sick is not fun.

So providers be honest. I typically have to use the bathroom several times the morning of an afternoon session due to a little anxiety/nerves (even at my age). Do you go through the same??

Oh I have no problems being honest about any of it. It happens. Plus if you cut a loud one when with me I would laugh. Cuz well. It’s funny! I can tell you this for a fact. I can not fart during sex. Like actual penetration. I know cuz I’ve tried. :-)

[Oralist]

Certain foods give me the farts. I no longer eat boxed cereal. Wheat, oats, rice, it makes no difference. A bowl of cereal and I will have the farts all day. Wet cereal, like oatmeal doesn’t affect me at all. TMI?

[ZantannaParella]

Originally Posted by Oralist

Certain foods give me the farts. I no longer eat boxed cereal. Wheat, oats, rice, it makes no difference. A bowl of cereal and I will have the farts all day. Wet cereal, like oatmeal doesn’t affect me at all. TMI?

Ummmmm. Have you read all my shit? Lol.

I have shared too much with u people. Sad thing is. Most people prob think I'm joking!

[Russ38]

I heart this thread......farts, flatulence, bubble-guts....it was funny when I was 5, and It’ll still be funny when I’m 50....keep the stories coming people.....

[ZantannaParella]

Originally Posted by Russ38

I heart this thread......farts, flatulence, bubble-guts....it was funny when I was 5, and It’ll still be funny when I’m 50....keep the stories coming people.....

So glad I'm not the only one! I just posted for shits and giggles. Too much drama up in here
Sometimes the shit gets real and blows ass

[Russ38]

I hear ya Zan.....sometimes you gotta shart that shit right outta the water....Tebow knows I’ve desecrated a truck stop or two.....

[low end theory]

Originally Posted by ZantannaParella

So glad I'm not the only one! I just posted for shits and giggles. Too much drama up in here
Sometimes the shit gets real and blows ass

+1

[Cendell M]

Originally Posted by allaboutthebbbj

This has never happened to me but I guess it would depend who I was with. I think that having to drop a deuce mid session would most likely end that session for me lol.

+1

[Slitlikr]

Nice threAD ZP!


Lmao, just kidding. Your sense of humor is priceless.
Got any crop dusting stories?


Go Astros!

[Cendell M]

Originally Posted by ZantannaParella

Oh shit (pun intended). That and the fact that I do my best thinking on the pot gave me a great idea!
As a general rule. Before seeing a provider /client pop an Imodium and take some beano and you shouldn’t have any issues!

Problem solved. Lol.

Haven't had the "issue" yet id probably die of embarrassment, but i will definitely keep your advice ya know just in case...💩 lmao

[ZantannaParella]

Funny you should ask. Was gonna be my next topic of discussion. But you know I can crop dust with the best of em. It's fun in grocery stores, Walmarts , and my ultimate fav place Eva crop dusting the old blue hairs in a bingo hall.

Next time I see you I will show off my dutch oven mad skills. My DO game is on point!

And please don't call me out. Haha I'm secretly trying to find all my fellow fart/shit fetish freaks! So HUSH!

Don't worry. Your still my ATFMM. Even tho you called me out on my shit! Lmao.

[Oralist]

What I want to know is why the Anal Seepage Trollstars haven’t weighed in on this Thread?

[ZantannaParella]

Originally Posted by Oralist

What I want to know is why the Anal Seepage Trollstars haven’t weighed in on this Thread?

Because trolls don't fart. Their assholes are located in their face in the shape of a mouth so instead of farts or shits they just blow mud threw their mouth-anus.

I mean. I'm Guessing. But sounds legit

[Oralist]

Originally Posted by ZantannaParella

Because trolls don't fart. Their assholes are located in their face in the shape of a mouth so instead of farts or shits they just blow mud threw their mouth-anus.

I mean. I'm Guessing. But sounds legit

No doubt!