ROVER14 get over yourself and .... BLONDE jokes!

[Guest101618]

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all work at the same office for a female boss who always goes home early.
"Hey, girls," says the brunette, "let's go home early tomorrow. She'll never know."

So the next day, they all leave right after the boss does. The brunette gets some extra gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde goes home to find her husband having sex with the female boss! She quietly sneaks out of the house and returns at her normal time.

"That was fun," says the brunette. "We should do it again sometime."

"No way," says the blonde. "I almost got caught."

[Still Looking]

A young woman (blonde) went to her doctor complaining of pain. "Where are you hurting?" asked the doctor. "You have to help me, I hurt all over", said the woman. "What do you mean, all over?" asked the doctor, "be a little more specific." The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled, "Ow, that hurts." Then she touched her left cheek and again yelled, "Ouch! That hurts, too." Then she touched her right earlobe, "Ow, even THAT hurts", she cried. The doctor looked at her thoughtfully for a moment and asked, "Are you a natural blonde?" "Why, yes," she said. "I thought so," said the doctor, "You have a broken finger."

[dbeartx]

hahaha, I got a hijack warning for my other jokes

A ventriloquist is sitting onstage at a comedy club. He and his dummy are spurting out really crude blonde jokes, when a blonde lady sitting in the audience stands up.

“I’m so sick of you people who think blondes are stupid. It’s because of you that I have had to work harder to prove myself at work and in the community. There are just as many dumb people with red or brown hair. There are just as many smart people with blonde hair.”

“Gosh, Miss, I’m terribly sorry. I was just telling jokes, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

“Shut up! I’m not talking to you. I’m talking to that little jerk on your lap!”

[Guest101618]

There was a blonde woman who was having financial troubles so she decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. She went to a local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this note: I have kidnapped your child. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park tomorrow at 7 A.M. Signed, The Blonde. She pinned the note inside the little boy's jacket and told him to go straight home. The next morning, she returned to the park to find the $10,000 in a brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as she had instructed. Inside the bag was the following note, "Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would do this to another!"

[mwsatx]

Originally Posted by Ginger Lovelace

I need to find an avatar of a pit bull wearing a skirt.

Just for you babe!

[dbeartx]

** i'm a dumbass & reposted **

[Guest101618]

SL,

I've got some white t-shirts and a Sharpie. Now all I need is a better tag line on the shirt than that lame ass one you have. Any suggestions?

[dbeartx]

Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run like hell, because she's got a pin in her mouth

[Still Looking]

Originally Posted by Rover14

SL,
I've got some white t-shirts and a Sharpie. Now all I need is a better tag line on the shirt than that lame ass one you have. Any suggestions?

Hummmmm how about...

I'm not as good looking as my dog
but I do have CASH!

1 .4"

[Still Looking]

Originally Posted by dbeartx

The silver haired lady confronted her doctor with a complaint of pains all over her body.
“Be more precise,” he said. “So I can help you, try pointing to some of the places that hurt.

The silver-haired doll put her finger on her arm and said, “Ouch!” then her finger to her hip and said, “Ouch!” and then to her rib cage and said, “Ouch!” again.

The doctor stopped her and asked, “Were you a blonde before your hair grayed”?

“Why yes!” she said excitedly, “But how did you know?”

The Doc answered, “Your finger’s broken.”

See post #17 LOL

[Guest101618]

Originally Posted by Still Looking

Hummmmm how about...

I'm not as good looking as my dog
but I do have CASH!

1 .4"

OUCH!

Wait, have you been looking in my bathroom window? Damn Peeping Tom!

[dbeartx]

A blonde had a near death experience recently when she went horseback riding. Everything was going fine until the horse started bouncing out of control. She tried with all her might to hang on, but was thrown off. With her foot caught in the stirrup, she fell head first to the ground. Her head continued to bounce on the ground as the horse did not stop or even slow down. Just as she was giving up hope and losing consciousness, the Wal-Mart manager came out and unplugged
it. Thank goodness for heroes.

[Guest101618]

Will this t-shirt work?

[dbeartx]

@Rover14, there's a t-shirt in that pic?

[dbeartx]