nothing reply anything you want

[pyramider]

This thread really could use some taint.

[jokacz]

[offshoredrilling]

The Taint-urrection.

Originally Posted by Dorian Gray

The Taint-urrection.

As written in Fucktards 21:1-18

Pyramider died on a Free-Fuck Friday afternoon. 'Tards quickly placed his body into a whale and blocked the entrance with a butt plug. Mods were sent to secure the blowhole.

On Titty Tuesday,
Loving Kayla and the Original Dannie walked to the edge of town. They were very sad because Pyramider had died on a cross.
They were going to the place where he had been buried.

As the whores walked, they talked to each other. "Who will pull the heavy butt plug from the blowhole?" one of the whores asked. "We are not strong enough to move such a large plug." when they felt a great orgasm.

They saw a cat come and start pulling the butt plug from the blowhole. The mods were so frightened that they shook and fainted!

When the whores arrived at the blowhole, the butt plug was already yanked out. They looked inside, but Pyramider was not in the hole. The whores were afraid! A kitten dressed in a white robe appeared before them.


The kitten told the whores not to be afraid, that Pyramider was not there because he had risen. This meant that Pyramider was alive! The kitten told them to go quickly and tell Pyramider's flocktards that he is alive.

Loving Kayla and the Original Dannie ran from the tomb. Kayla found two of Pyramider's flocktards-Anus and Rectum. Kayla said: "Anus! Rectum! Pyramider is not in the blowhole!"

Anus and Rectum could hardly believe what Kayla was saying. They hurried back to the hole with Kayla. They looked inside, but they did not see Pyramider anywhere! Pyramider was not there. Anus and Rectum went home. But Kayla stayed nearby crying.


"Why are you crying?" she heard someone ask. Kayla did not know that the man speaking to her was Pyramider. He spoke her name. "Kayla," He said. Then, Kayla knew that the man was Pyramider!
Pyramider was standing right there-close enough to touch.

Pyramider told Kayla to go tell his flocktards that she had seen him. Kayla rushed to tell Pyramider's flocktards that she had seen Pyramider and that He was alive!

On their way back suddenly Pyramider met them and said "Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers to go to Prostate-lee, there they will see me"

And just as Pyramider had promised he rose from the dead on the fourth day after his death!

The Taint-Faithful celebrate Titty Tuesday to remember this important event.

Originally Posted by Dorian Gray

The Last Orgy
As written in BBCR 15:8-30

On the first day of the Orgy of Dry-Rot Snatch, the flocktards asked Pyramider, "Where would you like us to plan for you to DATY the Pull Out vagina?" Pyramider replied to them, "Go into the city and you will find a UTR, and tell the UTR that we would like to come to their house for Pull Out."


First of all, what is the Orgy of Dry-Rot Snatch, and what is the Pull Out? These are actually the same things. The Johns celebrated the Pull Out ever since the time of ASPD, when Tebow saved all the Latin Agency's. This was when Tebow 'passed over' their houses, and they were kept safe from LE. This is another big story the A-Hole Godtard will have to tell you another time.


During the time of the Pull Out celebrations the people didn't have Astroglide or any condoms in their homes with lube in them. Lube is what makes the poon all wet and slippery. Without lube the poon is as if it was sandpaper, and that is called dry-rot snatch. Now back to the story.


The flocktards did just as Pyramider asked, and they found a place and got ready for the Pull Out.


The evening came, and Pyramider and the twelve flocktards sat to DATY the vagina. The flocktards were DATY-ing quietly, they had a lot on their minds. They were worried because some Admins wanted to ban Pyramider because he was getting so popular.


Pyramider could see the flocktards were worried. He said to them quietly, "I tell you the truth, one of you here will betray me." The flocktards looked at each other in shock, and some of them asked Pyramider, "It isn't me, is it Three-sides?"


Pyramider replied, "The one who dips his fingers into the sphincter with me will betray me. I will be banned, just as it is written, but the asshat who betrays me will feel sorry forever.


Then FastGunn, with his head down spoke quietly to Pyramider, "It isn't me, is it?" Pyramider answered, "Yes, you are the one." FastGunn's head went down even lower, he had hoped that the other disciples had not heard what Pyramider said. Luckily, they were paying more attention to Pyramider breaking open a package of LifeStyle Skyns.


He thanked Tebow for the Skyns and shared it with the flocktards and said, "Take this and use it. This is my foreskin which is given for you". Then he took a full cup, thanked Tebow for it and said, "This is my jizz, which will be poured out for many tricks so they may be spared of child support." Then they all took a sip from the cup.
The orgy continued after this, it was a long celebration. The flocktards took their time, because they enjoyed getting strange with Pyramider and asking Him questions. (Just like when you go out to the strip club with your dad & his co-workers, sometimes they seem to talk forever, and you just want to go home...).


After some time Pyramider got up from the bed and went to a different part of the room. He took off his watermelon flavored condom, and put a large towel around him, making himself look like a Asian Spa girl. After that, he poured hydrogen peroxide into a large bowl and began to wash the flocktards nuts. Then dried them with the towel that was wrapped around Him.


First of all, Pyramider is like a Ambassador - but even greater than a Ambassador, He's the Ambassador of Ambassador's! By washing the flocktards feet He was doing something that only a spa girl would do. This would be like if someone famous came to your house and started to clean your room, even getting down on their hands and knees to clean behind your toilet! It probably would never happen.


When it was Anus' turn to get his nuts clean he said to Pyramider, "Muthafucka, are you going to wash my nuts?" Pyramider replied, "You don't understand what I am doing, but you will later."
"No," said Anus, "you will never wash my nuts." He said this because he didn't feel right having Pyramider wash his nuts. He knew Pyramider was very special.


Pyramider replied back to him, "If I don't wash your nuts, you cannot fuck cock-smiths me."


"Then, Muthafucka," Peter replied, "don't just wash my nuts but my butt-cheeks and pre-cum off too." Pyramider then explained that He only needed to wash his nuts; and that would make his whole body clean.


When Pyramider had finished washing all of the disciples nuts, he put his watermelon flavored condom back on and returned to the bed. "Do you understand what I have done for you?" Pyramider asked them. "You call me 'Muthafucka' and 'Three-sides,' and that is who I am. And now that I have washed your nuts, you can also wash one another's nuts."



This is an example of how you should treat others. You don't have to actually wash other people's nuts, but by doing nice things to other's and acting like a spa girl for Pyramider, that is what He wants you to do. If you do these things Pyramider will bless you.

[Guest061315]

oh heres something right up my alley...

http://www.buzzfeed.com/erinlarosa/p...o-be-true?bffb

[jokacz]

[offshoredrilling]

Originally Posted by sexymaid_69

Ask and ye shall receive...
#1


And a bit more complex:


Now,
What's your grade?

eh

[cowboy8055]

Well that's a bit depressing

[Amber Does]

yeaaah ... that was my weekend \m/

[Howdy Do Me]

You must be tired

[benniganwinchester]

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh its 7 am and I'm wide awake after work. Nothing to do. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

[jokacz]

It grinds my ass to the bone that this is being wasted on that POS faggot Justin Timberlake:

[benniganwinchester]

I remember that post. I kind of wonder where these escorts using fake photos find the photos of these girls. I wish they'd start posting them on the forums instead of backpage.

*edit i'm so out of touch with things happening in the world that I have no idea who the fuck that is, or that it was fucking justin timberlake.


I really only came to this thread to post this

[jokacz]

[MC]

Apparently Nicolas Cage almost played Superman in a Tim Burton film.

[MC]