Please don't destroy my fantasy with the truth!

[guest043013-2]

OK, I have caught some flak for a couple of comments I recently made in two reviews. I didn't have PA, so the ROS was hidden from me. Thought I might explain something, and maybe generate a little discussion.

We all have fantasies. (well, I assume if you are breathing, heart still working at some level, and capable of remembering when you could keep an erection at least, you have fantasies.)

It is real disconcerting when a gal you have fantasies about but have never seen, is described in terms that destroy your fantasy. For the reviewer to destroy those fantasies, ah, how could you do that to me?

Obviously, there is a lot of tongue in cheek in what I am writing. All too often though, there is support for the fantasy out there (in ECCIE-land) and you want to believe the fantasy. You know it is pure fantasy, but maybe just this one time, just for you, it will come true. I think there is a certain banned provider that holds this for a lot of us. I went and did the session with her, and my fantasy was lost. Others review her, some describe a fantasy come true, others a fantasy lost like me.

Now, I realize there are several ladies I have fantasies about still. But, I may never see them. Why? Because my fantasy is so much better than I suspect the real thing will ever be. These two recent reviews dashed any hope of the fantasy being real. There is at least one other gal I have a fantasy about, have even exchanged some PMs and some friendly pokes on here. But, I don't want to lose my fantasy. I would rather keep my head in the sand, believe that she is all that is described by others, and keep that warm feeling about her.

Now I am not one to "rub one out" as some might say in my little fantasy, don't go drooling on my keyboard at her showcase, but to regard her with a awe let's me feel that perhaps one day my fantasy will come true.

From a discussion standpoint, wonder how many times the fantasy comes true for you guys and how often is it dashed to the ground, crumpled and broken, never to be resurrected?

[daty/o]

Being intellectually challenged, I limit my perspective of the hobby to two dimensions; physical and emotional. While some might say that I view my glass as 2/3 empty, I prefer to consider myself as more of a realist, the hobby being what it is. As such, I almost always rule out the emotional aspect from the onset. Then, to be safe, I tend to set my expectations of the physical at a very achievable level. It is, therefore, not surprising that I have a high percentage (not 100%, though) of fantasy-like encounters. Our girls are extraordinary, to say the least, but still, just girls. To put their pedestal too high is just setting myself up for disappointment. Just my .02.

Just as a side note, there is one provider that falls into the fantasy category for me (and I am sure she knows it). But, unlike your fear that the real thing may not live up to your fantasy, my concern is that it will exceed it. And that would put a serious dent in my ability to avoid the emotional pitfalls. Good luck, sir.

[sinep1]

A very wise person told me and still tells me "fantasy is always better than reality". Think back to when you were in your teens, remember how real the dreams were and how much you wanted to return to that exact spot in the dream when you were woken up?
That is what is called a fantasy or a dream, reality is a very different place, it is called consciousness. Where you choose to live determines how you experence things "Fantasy vs Reality".

[Red Tex]

Now I am not one to "rub one out" as some might say in my little fantasy

Why not? Now, I am not saying use their advertising as your porn, but sometimes a man cannot help himself!

[johnnylongcaulking]

Encounters are largely what you make of them. If you are good at building rapport, you'll have far more good encounters than bad ones. Achieving the fantasy is largely the responsibility of the one doing the fantasizing since only he or she can effectively communicate the salient details of the aforementioned fantasy.

[guest043013-2]

Originally Posted by johnnylongcaulking

Encounters are largely what you make of them. If you are good at building rapport, you'll have far more good encounters than bad ones. Achieving the fantasy is largely the responsibility of the one doing the fantasizing since only he or she can effectively communicate the salient details of the aforementioned fantasy.

AH, I must disagree to some extent. I understand the necessity to communicate my fantasy. However, when a lady is so scripted as to make me feel like I am an actor in a HS theatrical production, the fantasy is destroyed.

I do hope most realized my post here was with tongue firmly planted in cheek, in that reality will always destroy a fantasy. Nothing can supplant the human mind for entertainment. Reading a well written book will always be better than the movie.

At the same time, when entering a bedroom, a script will destroy the mood. When part of the fantasy was based on poor pictures, as suggested by another poster recently, the fantasy can be damaged. Granted, I can remember more than one session with a lady where there were no pictures or very limited pictures. However, the lady was able to provide an atmosphere that made her appearance unimportant, and the enjoyment of her company fulfilled my fantasy.

But if looks are deceiving, if attitude is poor, then the fantasy will fail.

[darkchoc6]

The first part of what I am going to say may sound smug but it isn't, please read the entire post and take it for what it is. When I was completing my psychology degree, we got to choose our own topics for various papers and research projects. My topics mostly consisted of sexual related topics. My research allowed me to dig deep into the minds of various people regarding sexuality, fantasy, and several other sexual related topics.

Everyone has fantasies. Some people hide them so deep that they do not even know what their fantasies are. Others (Like myself) are very aware of our fantasies. I could write another person an indepth paper on what a particular fantasy of mine is but chances are they could not actually execute it exactly as I wanted it. It is not a flaw on their part but the smells, sights, and sounds of my fantasy are just that, "MINE".

There is a provider that has been around for years here in the DFW. I used to read her reviews and every single one would make me "rub one out". This woman seemed to be everything I was looking for. She was a little on the high end side so it took me years to pull the trigger. I had this fantasy played out in my head of how our session would go, based on her pictures and her reviews. When I saw her, I had a great time but it did not live up to expectation. She did the same activities with me that she did with the others who reviewed her but the illusion of passion was different for me. The bottom line is that my expectations were too high.

I have had the pleasure of living out quite a few of my fantasies (through hobby world and the real world) but none of those experiences rank in my top 3 actual sexual experiences of all time. Anytime I think of my top 3 experiences, I instantly get turned on. Those fantasies that I have made into reality were good but not great.

[Kayleehotchick]

Well since I don't see providers that way, I can't tell you what it is like in the aspect. But I can relate to having fantasies dashed. There is this semi famous guy (and getting more and more famous every day) I always had a huge crush on. The first time I saw him on t.v, I KNEW I was going to date him. Well luck would have it, that I did just that. I got meet and date the man of my dreams! But oh wow....was it NOT like I thought it would be! I got the number, the score, the attention and all the drama that follows him (ie being contacted my jealous and hateful women). I was crushed crushed crushed!!!

Sometimes, things are better off left in your fantasies. I learned that the hard way.

[Guest022315]

I guess my only point is why fantasize about a provider. Chances are it will not live up to your fantasy. Deal with reality and if you have a blast woo hoo and if not you learn and go to the next provider