Lost my father this week. How to deal with grief?

[discreetgent]

I lost someone close to me a few years back. The passage of time has helped a lot. So has remembering the good things about the person.

[Sisyphus]

My condolences on your loss! There's really not much more to be said at this point.

As far as coming to terms with his passing...and the grief that you feel...you've already gotten loads of wonderful advice. I really don't have anything more to add other than...

Take the proper time to experience the grief & to mourn your loss. I think many times we just want the pain to go away as quickly as possible...only to find that trying to "force it" to abate only drags out the process in ways we don't realize at the time.

My father passed many, many years ago. Although I don't think I did so on purpose, I failed to process his death & mourn my loss at the time. Within weeks of his passing, there were other life-altering problems to address. In responding to those, I shoved my grief to the side...figuring there would be time to deal with it later. Only...I didn't. Not for a very long time.

When my mother died last summer, I handled it very differently & that has helped tremendously. I still miss them both...every day. They were great people! But, I think I'm much more at peace with it all this go around.

We all find our own time & place to deal with the deaths of those we were very close too. I wish you success & peace in finding yours.

[WTF]

Originally Posted by Grad Girl Next Door

Personally I don't believe time heals all wounds (no offense to Rabbit).

.

I recommend "Stumbling on Happiness", research shows that in fact time does heal.


http://mindful.org/in-body-and-mind/...g-on-happiness


Good luck Isabella!

[London Rayne]

I am very sorry for your loss. I can't imagine not having my parents around, but one day that will become a reality. I wish I could offer you more than just words.

[Mr. Smith111]

Everyone deals with grief in there own way, and while you never totally get over the loss, it does get better. For me, thinking back to things the person did that made me laugh or smile seems to help. Hang in there.

[Iaintliein]

There really is no way to deal with it. It continues to exist. . . as you must. With time you remember what you had more than you think about what's been taken from you. But you will never truly "lose" him, you will simply keep him closer within you.

My heart felt condolences.

[andras1]

I am sorry for your loss.Time helps.Remember all the nice moments you had with him.He will always be with you next to you.He can't be replaced.He will be there to guide you and help you.Just close your eyes and you will know he is there.Just smile when you can ,when you remember him.

[onehitwonder]

When my husband died I wanted to lay down right next to him. Like I had done every night for the past 25 years. I had no idea how I was going to breathe, much less do anything else without him. Everyone told me " Oh he's in a better place now" Really? And what better place than with me and our children, is there? I had to constantly remind myself that people did'nt really know what to say in times of grief and they were just trying to help. It does get easier to function as time goes by. But it never IMO goes away...the pain....the empty place in your heart.....I only thinck of him '1' million times a day now.....


You are blessed to have had a 'good' father. Honor him any way you can. Be it dedicating something to him like Marshall suggested or just being the kind of person he raised you to be..... peace be with you.........

[Capt. Lincoln F. Stern]

Originally Posted by BellaIsabella

Hey all, my dad passed a few days ago after loosing his battle with prostate cancer and I am just overwhelmed with grief. He was really one of my best friends in the world and the closest person to be in my family.

really don't know what to do or who to turn to, I have never dealt with this kind of loss before. If there is anyone who can offer some suggestions on how to better deal with this situation, please let me know, thanks.

I lost an uncle to that very same cancer on August 23rd 2009. I honor his memory by remembering the good times. I am fortunate to still have my parents around and they mean the world to me. The only way you get over it is you keep their memories alive, remember the good times, cherish them and do the best you can as they wanted you to.

You think about life and how precious it is, and you want to savor each moment.

Bella, I have found an inner peace when it comes to accepting what happens in life by reading THIS BOOK written by Neal Peart of Rush.

to quote him "Follow your front tire"