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Old 01-26-2017, 08:42 AM   #16
slinmo
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+1 wendlo and tm289. Between those two posts I imagine they identified about 85% of hobbyists. Personally I identify with wendlo almost 100%.

For pyramider, with my so it's a don't ask, don't tell situation, her choice. She loves me enough to recognize that I have needs and she doesn't want to know how I fill them. As long as I'm discreet to protect the family and as long as her debit card doesn't get denied, she turns a blind eye to my activity.
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Old 01-26-2017, 08:55 AM   #17
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Divorced. I don't hobby a lot. If I do, I prefer to just stick with the same provider for a long term arrangement, especially after we have become super comfortable with each other.

Plus it takes forever for me to find the right provider.
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Old 01-26-2017, 12:43 PM   #18
gentlemantoo
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The typical hobbyist is much like the typical provider, and can be summed up in one word- selfish. Each man here is going to get HIS needs satisfied, does not matter who it hurts, his wife, children, etc. If he would tend to his family's needs as much as he tended to his own, he would have a very happy family and a very happy life. Every man here, me as well, is here because something was missing in their life, sex, touch, whatever, instead of looking outside the family he should look to those closest to him. If he.showered his.wife with love and attention, she would naturally want to please him as well. But this way.seems easier to blow a load on a woman's face even if that act destroys all trust in his marriage, a betrayal of what society once considered sacred vows. Selfish.
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Old 01-26-2017, 02:01 PM   #19
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Former Catholic who got over the guilt.
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Old 01-26-2017, 02:06 PM   #20
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I would say I am not typical I'm 26 white male. I've been doing it since early 20's. For me I sleep with fair amount of real world women and even have relationships. I've been involved for over a year with the same woman. I've always been a dog though and slept around. Hobbying is so convienent and I fuck women I wouldn't fuck in real world scenarios. That's what is entertaining for me. I look at it from this perspective if I wanna eat Chinese food I'll go get some. If I want a hamburger I'll go get one. Why shouldn't it be the same for women. If I want a big booty girl there's several to choose from. Or a tattooed spinner? If I want it I can get it hobbying fills that want.
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Old 01-26-2017, 03:02 PM   #21
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No... My wife and friends would be hurt ,devastated and shocked.. I am not interested in an affair or permanent relationship although I did give having a sugar baby a thought.
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Old 01-26-2017, 03:10 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlemantoo View Post
The typical hobbyist is much like the typical provider, and can be summed up in one word- selfish. Each man here is going to get HIS needs satisfied, does not matter who it hurts, his wife, children, etc. If he would tend to his family's needs as much as he tended to his own, he would have a very happy family and a very happy life. Every man here, me as well, is here because something was missing in their life, sex, touch, whatever, instead of looking outside the family he should look to those closest to him. If he.showered his.wife with love and attention, she would naturally want to please him as well. But this way.seems easier to blow a load on a woman's face even if that act destroys all trust in his marriage, a betrayal of what society once considered sacred vows. Selfish.
Just wait till yor older and it becomes painful for your wife to provide that part. I personally hate the idea that I have to depend on other's but have grown close to most of them and see them as friends . I am very happy with my family went the extra mile for their needs I just forgot my needs. As for the ladies the vast
Majority of the ladies that I've met are not selfish..or they haven't shown me that side of themselves..they have expenses to meet and a personal life to maintain but on the average all of the ladies I have met are super they are giving,caring,sensitive humorous and have gone the extra mile for me from my perspective. I have totally enjoyed their company besides their services some of them I could totally see for a casual get together or just to casually chat without the services from them ..
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Old 01-26-2017, 04:12 PM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlemantoo View Post
The typical hobbyist is much like the typical provider, and can be summed up in one word- selfish. Each man here is going to get HIS needs satisfied, does not matter who it hurts, his wife, children, etc. If he would tend to his family's needs as much as he tended to his own, he would have a very happy family and a very happy life. Every man here, me as well, is here because something was missing in their life, sex, touch, whatever, instead of looking outside the family he should look to those closest to him. If he.showered his.wife with love and attention, she would naturally want to please him as well. But this way.seems easier to blow a load on a woman's face even if that act destroys all trust in his marriage, a betrayal of what society once considered sacred vows. Selfish.
I don't fully agree with this but this is the whole point of my post. I want to hear different vantage points.

I believe the selfish thing to do would be to divorce my wife and negatively affect my kids psychological well being and my relationship with them and turn my wife into a single mom who is going to struggle for the rest of her life.

Yes as it was said we should look inward first and try to fix what is driving this behavior. In most cases it cannot be fixed or altered as in many cases as discussed here.

What should a guy do? Make sure his wife or SO is on board. Not going to happen except in extreme circumstances.
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Old 01-26-2017, 04:15 PM   #24
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I have found that sugar dating might be a great alternative. In particular from a legal prespective. I may post on the legal boards to get some perspective.
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Old 01-26-2017, 04:27 PM   #25
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Well, I am a married white guy, 60. Had a spicy sex life with my gorgeous wife until she became ill. Went 4 years without sex until I decided I deserved a release every once in a while. I like being with 3 or 4 favorites rather than looking for variety, I also enjoy being with more mature women. I found that the lack of intimate touch is just as strong a motivator than lack of actual sex.
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Old 01-26-2017, 04:36 PM   #26
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You do not know my age nor family situation, please do not assume as I am an older man.

Every man on here discusses HIS needs, that is selfish whether you accept it or not. You can bullshit and talk about how you love your wives, but if you loved enpugh you would everything to ensure her happiness which includes being faithful. Yes, people sacrifice their own wants for the needs of the ones they love.

What example is a man showing to his kids by doing this? Son, it is okay to betray the woman you vowed to cherish if you want to. And daughter expect your husband to cheat and it is okay. I disagree with you. I know I am being selfish, married or not, when I use the services here.

To be in love and be a family man to me means putting aside my petty and superficial wants aside for the happiness of.my family. A love so strong that the thought of potentially hurting my SO in any manner, including infidelity, never enters a man's mind. If you do not have this love, then I should take proper steps as a family man to rekindle, respark, therapy, whatever to make it work.

Just my .02 cents.
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Old 01-26-2017, 04:40 PM   #27
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<<<< Is selfish no other reason. You only live once.
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Old 01-26-2017, 05:18 PM   #28
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A habitual hobbyist on average is white, mid 30's to early 60's, and missing something in their lives. It might be the ability to talk to a woman about his work and world events. Maybe it's being held and kissed. Sometimes it's as simple as giving and receiving oral or it could even be the experience of having a woman who actually enjoys sex. Those are the guys that become a provider's "regular".

The guys who flit from girl to girl like variety. They don't think they are missing anything. They tend to run the gamut of race and age.

Just my observations from my corner of Hobbyland.
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Old 01-26-2017, 06:37 PM   #29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlemantoo View Post
You do not know my age nor family situation, please do not assume as I am an older man.

Every man on here discusses HIS needs, that is selfish whether you accept it or not. You can bullshit and talk about how you love your wives, but if you loved enpugh you would everything to ensure her happiness which includes being faithful. Yes, people sacrifice their own wants for the needs of the ones they love.

What example is a man showing to his kids by doing this? Son, it is okay to betray the woman you vowed to cherish if you want to. And daughter expect your husband to cheat and it is okay. I disagree with you. I know I am being selfish, married or not, when I use the services here.

To be in love and be a family man to me means putting aside my petty and superficial wants aside for the happiness of.my family. A love so strong that the thought of potentially hurting my SO in any manner, including infidelity, never enters a man's mind. If you do not have this love, then I should take proper steps as a family man to rekindle, respark, therapy, whatever to make it work.

Just my .02 cents.
Successful men have almost always wanted and conquered multiple women. In the good old days, we could have multiple wives and rule the roost. Now all the feminist accommodating girlymen actually want us to please their wives?

{prohibited word} Please!!!

Men have no reason to get or stay married today if a woman isn't going to want to please him, too.
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Old 01-26-2017, 07:05 PM   #30
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DSK... I agree a man should not stay married to a woman that is not willing to please him. She does not love me, if she is unwilling to work just as hard at the relationship, and by work for her, I do not mean her just allowing me to be in her presence. I do not want to be with a woman that does not want me. It has to be both of us wanting it or I, having self respect, am out of the relationship. That is the example I would set for my family. Just my two cents.
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