3-some? & advice

[FishGuy13]

I am interested in setting up a 3-some with my RL GF, and thought where better to ask advice. She says she is poly and not the jealous type and I know that to be true to a point, we met at a cuddle party. I am just not sure about when the clothes came off, if she would be jealous or not. I even said I was ok with a FMF, or MFM or some variation. I have been lucky enough to have one with two great ladies from this site. I have been honest in saying that in the past I have paid for it and every so often while driving I'll say hmm got laid in this area too and she seems ok with it.
Should I keep it a great memory / sneak away play time only?
Only providers with great reviews and or that I have seen before?
If I / we pick out a civie how similar or how different to her should we keep it?
Any other tips or advice I did not think about?

FishGuy13

[drexplosivo]

Everything Im about to say assumes that you value your relationship and want to stay with your SO:

Best advice is let her do all the negotiations. She picks out the other girl, she and other girl decide the rules, she makes the call on if it's a one-time-only deal or if you're cleaning out the spare bedroom to move your new third in.

Unless and until she is comfortable, it's a no go. She's poly, and not the jealous type, which is awesome, but if she hasn't done something like this before, she's got no idea how she'll react to seeing you put it to another girl.

If you really want this to happen, and keep your relationship, talk it out with her. Be patient. Don't let it fall off the radar, ask her about famous girls, or people at the restaurant/bar you're hanging out at, to gauge what she likes. Talk to her about what she wants out of this, and what her hard limits would be...and if she has any, RESPECT THEM. Even if they make no sense (I can cum up her ass but I can't play with her hair? WTF?!?) Just accept that those hard limits are the price of admission. Same goes for you. Tell her what you want, and what you aren't OK with. Be honest with her and yourself. If it's going to get you bunched up if they play separately in the shower while you're recovering, say so. Even if it seems silly, or even if you're afraid it might be a deal breaker. Trust me on this if nothing else: set your limits and respect hers. Do that one thing, and if you can come to terms within that framework, fuck on, brother. If not, it's probably best to pay-to-play with doubles and keep things with the SO strictly solo.

[Guest092216]

If she means a lot to you I wouldn't mix hobby with private life. If you can live without her then give it a go.

[Guest070818-1]

Cuddle party? What? Those even exist?

Hahaha.

But really though, you're thinking way too much about this - it sounds like you have a problem with coming to the realization that she is indeed polyamorous.

Here's my shrinkage for the day:

If she is poly . . . go for it. She apparently doesn't care, so why should you? It's not like you'll be putting her into a position to fulfill some one-sided fantasy of yours with a girlfriend who is strictly monogamous.

[berkleigh]

Originally Posted by THN

If she means a lot to you I wouldn't mix hobby with private life. If you can live without her then give it a go.

Agreed!!!

[pmdelites]

if it were me, i'd make this about her pleasure and delites.
ask her what she wants to experience - having the other woman get her off, getting the other woman off, tag teaming w/ her on you, ...

ask her what kind of a woman she would like to be with - diff/same hair style, diff/same body style, assertive or passive woman, ...

if she knows you're on here, then get on here and let her look at showcases and read some stuff. if not, how you gonna find a third?

regardless of who you pick, i'd say pick an above average provider to up the probability of a deliteful time for all. unless she wants just some down and sexy sex - then go w/ that kind of provider.

good luck!!
and pls let us know how it came out!

[DallasRain]

Originally Posted by berkleigh

Agreed!!!

ditto........just let sleeping dogs lie and carry on like you have been! Have fun baby!

[debeter]

Take to heart THN comments..... Seriously sir. and honestly you don't need to be setting up the event cause being a man I see one sided, thinking about your own fantasy.. If she wants this to happen she needs to be the one running the gig and selecting and making the decisions who she will be bring in to the party and joining the two of you.

Been there and done that. Just like you don't go to VS and buy 1 size larger lingerie cause you don't know her size. Always buy smaller, if it fits it'll be tight. Personally like tight but again don't buy big. Done that too, didn't win any brownie points that day.

[Kendall4U]

Don't mix the two worlds. Very bad idea.

[txexetoo]

What is a cuddle party and how do I get invited