To make it straight, she pulls it..
To make it stand, she rubs it.
To make it stiff, she licks it.
To put it in, she pushes it.
It's hell of a job threading a needle!
A guy donated blood to his girlfriend. When they broke up, he wanted his blood back.
The girl threw a bloody kotex at him and said, I'll pay you in monthly installments.'
Girl in cinema turns sideways and whispers to her boyfriend.
'The man next to me is masturbating!'
Bf: 'Ignore him.'
Gf: 'I can't.'
Bf: 'Why not?'
Gf: 'He is using my hand!'
The Bio teacher draws a huge PENIS on the board and asks 'Does anybody know what this is?
Dirty Harry says 'Oh, it's a penis and you know my dad's got 2 of them?'
The teacher says '2 of them?'
Harry says 'ya! The little one he uses to pee, and the big one to brush mum's teeth.'
4 miracles of a woman
Getting wet without taking a shower
Bleeding without getting hurt
Giving milk without eating grass
Making boneless meat hard.
What is the smallest hotel in the world?
The answer is 'Vagina Inn'
It accomodates only 1 standing occupant with his 2 baggages left outside.
Unborn twins saw a penis approaching.
1st: Papa coming, papa coming.
2nd: U fool, it's uncle! Papa never comes with a raincoat!
A hubby said to his wife, 'I will take a photo of your breasts and frame it..'
The wife said to husband, 'I will take a photo of your penis and enlarge it.'
At 15, a girl is a SURPRISE.
At 25, she is the RIGHT PRICE.
At 35, a GRAND PRIZE.
At 45, a CONSOLATION PRIZE.
At 55, she is a DOOR PRIZE, and
At 65, a GIVEAWAY PRIZE.
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What did Snow White complain about after having sex with the 7 dwarfs?
Snow White said, 'I would rather have 7 inches at 1 time.
Not 1 inch 7 times.'
The vagina is the world's best rehabilatation/correction center.
Even the most violent and aggressive penis comes out humbled, head bowed and reduced in size.
A loving husband had 'I Love You' tattoed on his dick.
When he got home, he showed it to his wife.
She said, 'There u go again, trying to put words in my mouth.'
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