When a man hits "50" why he must hobby and getting married is NO longer an option!

[Still Looking]

Originally Posted by Windinhishair

Marriage is always an option at any any age. So is suicide.

[pgman]

Originally Posted by sue_nami

oh and BTW i do believe in gay marriage, if the straight folks get benefits bestowed by the government for following the rules so so the gay folks.

“I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.”
― Kinky Friedman

[JennsLolli]

Originally Posted by icuminpeace

Men should not get married at all. Women don't love men, they love the stability and paycheck. It's cheaper to pay for sex than to compromise future earnings. Sorry for sounding cold and pragmatic but that's been my experience.

Well that's one way to look at the history of marriage and the subjugation of women. (What you're trying to say is "fuck the patriarchy.")

[anita]

LMAO!!! I would like to get married again one day. I am thinking when I am 35-40 years old. And yes, I already have a child so it will be a package deal lol. And yes, I will partly be there for financial security even if I keep my job. Just like in the hobby world, I will not only be there for the financial aspect. Falling in love is a funny thing though, you don't get to choose the person. It just happens. However, ideally I will go for someone at least 8 years older than me.

[googol^googol]

The description given doesn't line up with my experience. Mine has been more like budman's.

I was a high school teacher and my oldest former students are now 34. I realize that most folks are fully adults by somewhere in their late 20's, but I still have trouble not thinking of anyone under 30 as a child. That's partly my former-student ideas and partly that many, many still are.

Somewhere in their late-30's, many women reach a new level of self-awareness. They've been through a relationship or two, maybe a marriage. They have a good idea of what they want and what they don't want. They don't NEED a man. They want a man around for fun. Sometimes. I'm sure there are plenty of cranky women out there. So, just stay away from them and hang out with the relaxed ones. There are plenty. Some want to have fun, with the possibility of something more long-term developing. Some just want to have fun. You don't need every single 45-something woman to be funny and smart and attractive and passionate and sexually adventurous. Just enough of 'em to keep you busy. And there are.

It is true that somewhere around age 50 many women stop having much interest in men. But not all. Again, it isn't necessary that every single one be available and interesting. Enjoy the ones that are.

I assume SL's post was mostly for humor. 'Cause there sure are other options besides only either Hobbying or Marriage.

[ck1942]

An interesting topic, whether personal, humorous or otherwise.

Let me say this, first.

What happens below in this post is both my personal opinion (much as the preceding posts) and a little bit of fact, both with and without citation.

Consider that marriage, historically, as a legal institution, in other words, part of the legal fabric of a society, was created mostly due to "property rights." e.g., inheritance of physical and real estate property.

And, consider also that in many societies reaching back centuries (yes, Anglo-Saxon, etc.) females were then considered chattel, could not always inherit (their legal male spouse received the inheritance and controlled it) and certain persons (female AND male) subject to royal control or to "noble" control had to get permission to wed. [see Droit du seigneur
at Wikipedia]

Enough on the above and very glad to live in the society and legal framework (including gay marriage) we now live in.

There is a lot of statistical data (not necessarily evidence) regarding marriage in the U.S. And what appears to be the more recent study (link below)

http://www.bls.gov/opub/mlr/2013/art...attainment.htm

is more about education, race, gender and not particularly about age, per se, but if you look at it carefully, you will see much age-related data.

That said, in my experience, everyone's perspective is colored by his/her personal experience and that of their friends, co-workers, relatives and associates.

e.g., if you hang with a bunch of divorced folks, quite likely you will see marriage quite differently than if you hang with mostly married folks. I cannot back up this statement with statistics, and I didn't search for any studies within.

But I personally know of many marriages still intact after 30, 40 and 50 years or more. And I also personally know many folks who are within their second marital journey and many who are still divorced.

imo, the press reports of marriage/divorce statistics are skewed.

imo, the 50/50 split reflects what I call many "steady marriages," the more or less 50 pct who get married and stay married.

imo the majority of "second marriages" (see the BLS -- that's Bureau of Labor Statistics -- not Ball Licking and Sucking! -- study link above) is where the divorce rate comes in.

See Table 3 in the BLS study in which by age 46 still 53 pct of all original marriages remain intact.

Enough of statistics about wedded bliss and divorce and whatever.

= = = = =

Almost time to pack up and get ready for today's San Antonio community lunch, hanging out with a bunch of "singles" (well, many of us may have spouses or s.o.'s, but for the time being we are single) all horny and looking to get laid, blown, kissed and generally well f*cked!

Carry on!

[SpeedRacerXXX]

Originally Posted by sue_nami

anybody who professes to believe in marriage and is on this site is deluding themselves and living a lie.

Is your problem with men having sex with hookers or men having sex with any other woman outside of the marriage?

[sue_nami]

Here is the issue i have with Marriage>>>my problem is hypocritical people who lie to their spouses and promise fidelity in front of everyone and pledge to god to be 100% faithful. Then the the same breath some folks deny the right to marriage to gays, all the while on their 4th marriage, cheating and lying and acting like marriage is so fucking important. then they are all sanctimonious and defend marriage and expect their spouse to be monogamous and all the while hanging out on a hooker board and writing reviews of cheating. all hail the holy insitutution of matrimony and by all means deny the right to anyone who is not hetero. the whole thing is total BS to control us. I had an open relationship with a man for 12 years. no lies. i had an open relationship with a man and woman for 6 years, no lies. I just don't get why everyone cheats and lies when u can just hang out and not fake it with BS religious vows that you break and ignore. I am not against a life partner, I am against cheating and lying and i feel it is inherent in the outdated institution of marriage. I just wanna fuck and hang out, no piece of paper doled out by the govt necessary.

[rockerrick]

I agree with you Sue on the cheating aspect.
No one twisted their arms and made them promise to be faithful to one woman.
What does marriage even mean if you can't do what you promised, or get the fuck out?
Now they will all whine and talk about how expensive divorce is, or I'm doing it because of the kids.
Well you are not doing them, yourself, or your spouse any favors continuing a lie.
Go ahead and rationalize, but that is what it is.

[Still Looking]

In COLD WEATHER STATES lots of marriages in the fall. Lots of divorces in the spring!

They get married to stay warm over the winter and when spring hits they are gone!

[sue_nami]

I think we need to tax the churches and let gays marry

[Claire She Blows]

Originally Posted by googol^googol

Somewhere in their late-30's, many women reach a new level of self-awareness. They've been through a relationship or two, maybe a marriage. They have a good idea of what they want and what they don't want. They don't NEED a man. They want a man around for fun. Sometimes. I'm sure there are plenty of cranky women out there. So, just stay away from them and hang out with the relaxed ones. There are plenty. Some want to have fun, with the possibility of something more long-term developing. Some just want to have fun. You don't need every single 45-something woman to be funny and smart and attractive and passionate and sexually adventurous. Just enough of 'em to keep you busy. And there are.

+1

[SpeedRacerXXX]

Originally Posted by sue_nami

Here is the issue i have with Marriage>>>my problem is hypocritical people who lie to their spouses and promise fidelity in front of everyone and pledge to god to be 100% faithful. Then the the same breath some folks deny the right to marriage to gays, all the while on their 4th marriage, cheating and lying and acting like marriage is so fucking important. then they are all sanctimonious and defend marriage and expect their spouse to be monogamous and all the while hanging out on a hooker board and writing reviews of cheating. all hail the holy insitutution of matrimony and by all means deny the right to anyone who is not hetero. the whole thing is total BS to control us. I had an open relationship with a man for 12 years. no lies. i had an open relationship with a man and woman for 6 years, no lies. I just don't get why everyone cheats and lies when u can just hang out and not fake it with BS religious vows that you break and ignore. I am not against a life partner, I am against cheating and lying and i feel it is inherent in the outdated institution of marriage. I just wanna fuck and hang out, no piece of paper doled out by the govt necessary.

LOL. Thanks for the response. I certainly do not disagree with most of your statements. I am married for the 2nd time -- 6+ years and counting. My first wife was monogamous and I was not. My current wife and I do not have an open marriage but we are swingers. No cheating, no lying. The only thing I would disagree with you on is that marriage is important for legal reasons.

[TemptationTammie]

I definitely prefer the open or swinging type of relationship with no lies or secrets. Where it's only cheating when those are involved, but variety of partners is encouraged and allowed.

[chelseabean]

Originally Posted by googol^googol

The description given doesn't line up with my experience. Mine has been more like budman's.

I was a high school teacher and my oldest former students are now 34. I realize that most folks are fully adults by somewhere in their late 20's, but I still have trouble not thinking of anyone under 30 as a child. That's partly my former-student ideas and partly that many, many still are.

Somewhere in their late-30's, many women reach a new level of self-awareness. They've been through a relationship or two, maybe a marriage. They have a good idea of what they want and what they don't want. They don't NEED a man. They want a man around for fun. Sometimes. I'm sure there are plenty of cranky women out there. So, just stay away from them and hang out with the relaxed ones. There are plenty. Some want to have fun, with the possibility of something more long-term developing. Some just want to have fun. You don't need every

single 45-something woman to be funny and smart and attractive and passionate and sexually adventurous. Just enough of 'em to keep you busy. And there are.

It is true that somewhere around age 50 many women stop having much interest in men. But not all. Again, it isn't necessary that every single one be available and interesting. Enjoy the ones that are.

I assume SL's post was mostly for humor. 'Cause there sure are other options besides only either Hobbying or Marriage.

Yesss! I taught 7th grade many years ago. I have seen a few significantly younger men in this capacity (I never would see someone so young in " real" life and usually turn those appointments down now), and it completely creeps me out. All I can think is "so that's what that kid (former student) would look like now". No thanks. I love men in their forties. They have usually accomplished much of what they set out to and consequently many of them are confident, laid back and generous. I even kind of like a little pudge around the middle. Feels cozy to me.