Why men need Sensitivity training.

[GTDADDY]

Reasons for Sensitivity Training for Men:


* I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair but, by turning to religion, I was soon able to come to terms with the whole thing. I converted to Islam, and we're stoning her in the morning!



* The wife suggested I get myself one of those penis enlargers, so I did. She's 25, and her name's Kathy.



* Went to our local bar with my wife last night. Locals started shouting "pedophile!" and other names at me, just because my wife is 24 and I'm 50. It completely spoiled our 10th anniversary.



* The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex with me because she can't afford batteries.



* A man calls 911 and says "I think my wife is dead". The operator says, "How do you know?" The man says, "The sex is about the same, but the ironing is piling up!"



* I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated, but must come back as a different creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. I said, "You obviously haven't been listening."



* My wife has been missing a week now. The police said to prepare for the worst. So, I had to go down to Goodwill to get all of her clothes back.



* The Red Cross just knocked on my door and asked if we could contribute towards the floods in Pakistan. I said we'd love to, but our garden hose only reaches the driveway.



* I was approached by a lady who asked me to buy a raffle ticket for an African orphan. I said hell no, with my luck I’d win one!

[Guest051014-1]

By the time I got to the third one I was laughing on the floor....

[RedLeg505]

Originally Posted by thatguy1975

By the time I got to the third one I was laughing on the floor....

The fourth one is what had me rolling on the floor.

[Poonam22]

Its so awesome laughing story.
Thanks guys.

[TRIN]

See if these are any good:

I've just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. It makes the wife look like she's moving during sex.

****************************** ******************************

The wife's back on the warpath again. Last night she said she wanted to make a sex movie, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.

****************************** ******************************

I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.

****************************** ****************************** *********

After both suffering from depression for awhile, the wife and I were going to commit suicide yesterday. But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I started to feel a lot better. So I thought, screw it, I'll soldier on!

****************************** **********************

I woke up this morning at 8 and just felt that something was wrong. I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing! I panicked. I didn't know what to do. Then I remembered McDonald's serves breakfast until 11:30.

****************************** ****************************** *******

The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"

****************************** ****************************** *********

My wife packed my bags and said "GET OUT!!!". As I walked out the front door, she screamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!"

"Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"