How to get comfortable...

[jaysaylor]

I must admit that I am fairly new to all of this. I've seen one lady in KC, Ginger, who was very patient with me on my first time and I can't thank her enough. My question is, I want to see someone else, and might have something lined up later this week, but I am a nervous wreck.

The lady I am in contact with is very well reveiewed and I know that she is not LE or working with them. I am just extremely nervous that I will show up to a sting or have somebody watching me all of the time. I know that some paranoia is healthy, but I just want to guage my paranoia with others in the hobby.

How do I make myself at ease without turning the provider off by pestering her with questions, etc... to make me feel safer? Does it ever go away?

[b@ileythepistol]

It seems no matter how long you see women a lot of men still feel nervous the first time meeting... It may be easier to find a good regular provider or two that way you know what your getting into a may feel more relaxed

[SinsOfTheFlesh]

Part of it is just getting your feet wet enough so that you stop noticing that you are standing in water

Your first few experiences are bound to be the most difficult in terms of nerves. With experience and time though, some of the paranoia will abate. Men often refer to their "spidey senses", distinguishing the experienced hobbyists ability to spot red flags, as opposed to the newbs jumpy nerves that makes everything seem like red flags. You will get there.

In the meantime, keep seeing ladies with a long history of reviews, well known reputations, who are newbie friendly and willing to work with new guys. I don't mind a little hand holding to put nerves at ease.

[KCQuestor]

How did you get over your nerves when it came to going to a massage parlor? Four of your five reviews are for massages, and you don't mention nerves there. I'd be MUCH more nervous about a sting or being watched at a business known for providing sexual services.

[pyramider]

What's to be nervous about? Take me ... I accept the fact that the ladies will laugh at me when they see me. I accept the fact I am a lousy lay. I accept the fact that the lady will be disappointed. I accept the fact that the lady will be relieved when I leave. Just accept the facts.

[luvlittlemilkers]

Originally Posted by KCQuestor

I'd be MUCH more nervous about a sting or being watched at a business known for providing sexual services.

That's a good point KC, I progressed the same as the OP, going from massage to provider. I guess you tend to feel safer going into a store front knowing that LE is not waiting behind the door for you to incriminate yourself. In my mind, it seems much easier to defend that you are there for a legit massage. I may be wrong, but that's what my thought process was.

As far as being able to get comfortable with providers, I signed up for P411 and only call on girls who are on both ECCIE and P411 and are reviewed. That makes me feel better about new encounters. However there are still the nerves of meeting someone new and not being sure if you will click or not. Do your research and you will be just fine.

[HeyMikeyHeLikesIt]

Hell thats part of the fun.... Risk vs reward... The unknown... The nerves and adrenalin... Its part of the game for me, if i ever got over that feeling i'd probably quit. Still, i am careful to try to make sure providers are legit. Even before i learned about this forum, i would not see a provider unless she had been posting in the same city for several months (BP or CL). Not the best method, but it was all i knew at the time.

[malwoody]

Originally Posted by KCQuestor

How did you get over your nerves when it came to going to a massage parlor? Four of your five reviews are for massages, and you don't mention nerves there. I'd be MUCH more nervous about a sting or being watched at a business known for providing sexual services.

I don't know about anyone else but I would be a whole lot more nervous going to a MP than seeing a verified hourly friend..

[jaysaylor]

luv, I'm glad I'm not the only one that progressed this way. I know it seems odd to some, but this is my progression too. I'm sure it will pass, and I do much research, almost to the point of OCD when it comes to these things. I still get nervous though.

[equation]

Like many, I started with legit massage, progressed to body rubs, and then fs providers. Once I went that route, I was dumber than a bag of rocks, I would just go to bp or craigslist, make the call, and take the fall. Fortunately, I have never been busted, beatup, nor burglarized. Lately, I'm more nervous than ever; not from potential LE ( I trust my insticts on that point), but a sub-standard session and wasting my well-earned $$. Little advice, schedule early morning sessions, if you can. Things are more relaxed then I've learned.

[pmdelites]

jay, in my opinion, there is a difference between a) being nervous about getting caught and b) being nervous about the encounter being less than deliteful.

wrt a), others have given good advice - less the probability by going w/ well know and reviewed providers who have above average reputations. but, always be aware of who you're going to visit, the neighborhood, the actual location, etc. i've read stories of a guy going to visit a woman and just by coincidence there were police cars or paddy wagons or undercover cops around.
play it safe rather than being sorry.

wrt b), again, go w/ well reviewed women.
even after a dozen+ yrs in this sub-culture, i often have butterflies in my gut as i walk up to and knock on the door of a woman i've never visited. fortunately w/ my research, my deliteful/not-so-deliteful percentage is about 70-80%.

so, just breathe, focus on your confidence, and hope that the encounter turns out well.
every encounter isint a sure thing, but when it works out, wholly fucking guacamole!!!!!