Dear Dancer(s)
Dear (insert town or club name of your choice) Dancer(s):
Let me tell you the REAL reason you didn't make money tonight, or last night, or last week, or ever. No, it's not because of cheap-ass customers. It's because you were either in the dressing room or at the bar bitching about cheap-ass customers and how you weren't making money rather than with customers making money. Or you were hanging with your broke-ass friends. The difference between them and us? Cheap-ass customers have money.
You're welcome.
(I had to rant. I've had too many recent club visits where I spent more on the door fee than on dancers).
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