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alluringava · 03-12-2011, 02:13 AM

....I refuse to see him or do something he requests that isn't on my DO list of things. I don't get that. One guy threatened to send LE copies of my ads and I think to myself, you know, isn't that blackmail to say " If you don't do this/see me I will turn you in?" And won't they ask him exactly what he was doing looking at my ads and 'soliciting me to begin with? Nonetheless on the very rare occasion when this happens, it's unsettling to me.

NinaBrooke · 03-12-2011, 04:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alluringava

....I refuse to see him or do something he requests that isn't on my DO list of things. I don't get that. One guy threatened to send LE copies of my ads and I think to myself, you know, isn't that blackmail to say " If you don't do this/see me I will turn you in?" And won't they ask him exactly what he was doing looking at my ads and 'soliciting me to begin with? Nonetheless on the very rare occasion when this happens, it's unsettling to me.

if you have this in writing yo might want to contact a lawyer. Threatening and extorting people is worse than the "crime" you might get extorted for - at least in the USA. He will face a fellony and not a misdemeanor and i would make this clear to him or let this be made clear to him. Plus, any kind of conversation with him should be recorded or kept for your sake.

topsgt38801 · 03-12-2011, 11:32 AM

The situation would depend on the laws in the state you are in, but I believe you could build a case against him. As for recording the calls, be extremely careful because in many states you can be prosecuted for recording someone without thier knowledge. That also varies from state to state.

Top

Chica Chaser · 03-12-2011, 11:48 AM

With no face pics in your ads and a hobby/work phone, tell him to pound sand! Prove it is you in the ads and prove that you actually placed those ads, when the cops show up.

And further, its only illegal if you take or agree to take money in exchange for sex. LE has to witness that transaction occur, plus I really doubt an anonymous tip from a jilted hobbyist will get much attention or time devoted from LE.

Mojojo · 03-12-2011, 01:18 PM

Plus theres no law against offering escort services. It's only companionship anyways. If he solicits you then thats another issue.

alluringava · 03-12-2011, 02:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by topsgt38801

The situation would depend on the laws in the state you are in, but I believe you could build a case against him. As for recording the calls, be extremely careful because in many states you can be prosecuted for recording someone without thier knowledge. That also varies from state to state.

Top

It was mostly e mails, which I kept. People like that guy rarely make good on their threats and I suspect it was more of a case of his ego being bruised. But just in case it's always good to be prepared.

SneakyCancer · 03-12-2011, 04:55 PM

very simple on recording the fellow....at the beginning of the conversation, inform him this call may be recorded for quality assurance. then your off the hook.....

how is the bastard going to threaten you over a favor? pay for it or be busted and sued. i think that is much worse than forking over a few 20's.

topsgt38801 · 03-12-2011, 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alluringava

It was mostly e mails, which I kept. People like that guy rarely make good on their threats and I suspect it was more of a case of his ego being bruised. But just in case it's always good to be prepared.

I agree with Chica he would have a hard time making a case LE would want to spend time on.. I really think all this individual is doing is playing games with you and if you ignore them, they hopefully will go away. I would not respond to anymore e mails with him and just delete them without opening when they come in. I do not see anyway that he can do anything with LE and LE normally cannot do anything just relating to threats and that would be the case in nearly every state.

Just ignore them and best of luck.

Chica Chaser · 03-13-2011, 01:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by topsgt38801

I agree with Chica he would have a hard time making a case LE would want to spend time on.. I really think all this individual is doing is playing games with you and if you ignore them, they hopefully will go away. I would not respond to anymore e mails with him and just delete them without opening when they come in. I do not see anyway that he can do anything with LE and LE normally cannot do anything just relating to threats and that would be the case in nearly every state.

Just ignore them and best of luck.

Exactly, tell him to pound sand!

incognito isis · 03-13-2011, 03:19 AM

Guys like him are scum. Period. Also, you gotta handle with care when dealing with alot of the middle aged fellows. They are going thru some kinda mid-life crisis thing. Their egos are fragile. They've been married for ages and when they taste new or young, tender, juicy meat they can't stand to go back to left overs. Some of these guys want MORE MORE MORE and become out of touch with reality. This is, after all, a hobby not a true relationship. But again, for the mid life crisis bunch it's hard, or for that matter, any man in crisis will become sensitive. OR ANY HUMAN but I'm talking about the guys here. I think, and maybe I'm off base here, but I see alot of hatred in men because I don't want to hang with them off the clock. I really think the hobby can bring out some extreme emotions in men. You owe that man nothing, but he is a pompous who feels like you do. I can't believe the hipocrasy that goes on in the hobby.....so many clients "try" to lean on me for emotional support, but if the tables were turned I would not be able to turn to them for support. My point is, don't let anyone push you around.

NinaBrooke · 03-13-2011, 06:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by incognito isis

Guys like him are scum. Period. Also, you gotta handle with care when dealing with alot of the middle aged fellows. They are going thru some kinda mid-life crisis thing. Their egos are fragile. They've been married for ages and when they taste new or young, tender, juicy meat they can't stand to go back to left overs. Some of these guys want MORE MORE MORE and become out of touch with reality. This is, after all, a hobby not a true relationship. But again, for the mid life crisis bunch it's hard, or for that matter, any man in crisis will become sensitive. OR ANY HUMAN but I'm talking about the guys here. I think, and maybe I'm off base here, but I see alot of hatred in men because I don't want to hang with them off the clock. I really think the hobby can bring out some extreme emotions in men. You owe that man nothing, but he is a pompous who feels like you do. I can't believe the hipocrasy that goes on in the hobby.....so many clients "try" to lean on me for emotional support, but if the tables were turned I would not be able to turn to them for support. My point is, don't let anyone push you around.

i agree with most you said. Some people confuse private relationships with business ones. Or mix them together and label it different while the content is the same like a paid arrangement. I disagree that the wife is old meat at home, i`d rather say its a game of power they like to play. To feel good about themselves because they lost power - sometimes - to change their life or their old relationships. So they feel they want to be powerful in the "dark side" of their lives. I assume people playing this sort of game play such standards also outside the business or are in relationships where power dominates rather than love or understanding.

ShysterJon · 03-13-2011, 11:37 AM

I don't know why, but lately a number of hobbyists in the Dallas-Fort Worth area have been harassing, stalking, and threatening providers. Six months ago I might have been approached maybe once a month by a provider who felt harassed. About a month ago I started getting such a contact nearly every week. Last week, I got three.

I'm currently writing an update of a thread I wrote a few years ago on the topic. But I'll summarize what, I think, should be a provider's basic approach to a hobbyist who engages in such conduct:

1. Try your best to ignore him. Men like this get off by the fear they create. If you don't reply, the bully won't get the reaction out of you he wants and chances are he'll go away.

2. If you get more than one such unwanted communication, start saving them.

3. If you ignore the bully but the communications continue, hire a lawyer. So far, my method of dealing with these schmucks has a 100% success rate. I call them and tell them what the law says, explain how they're violating the law, and what I'll do if they don't stop immediately -- have my investigator find out who they are and file a report with the police department where the bully lives. I have never had a hobbyist continue his conduct after he and I have had this conversation.

4. When I say hire a lawyer, I mean HIRE a lawyer. Don't trade services or expect a lawyer to work for free. His time is as valuable as yours. If the bully is messing with your mind, like bullies tend to do, paying a lawyer to give Mr. Pencildick a "come to Jesus" talk will be money well spent.

I imagine some people might think suing the harasser is an option. One problem with suing is proving up damages. If there aren't actual damages, chances are it won't be worth a lawyer's time to work on the case on a contingency fee basis. But the bigger problem, to me, is bringing a relationship which is illegal by nature into court. I can't imagine many providers wanting to do that.

MOCHAakaMOCHA · 03-13-2011, 12:37 PM

I've had a few do it after refusing to see them for various reasons OR if they show up and purposely try to short me and I tell them to kick rock.... I always tell them "good luck with that".

heidilynnla · 03-14-2011, 05:34 PM

I've had a guy threaten to give me a bad review because I didn't call him back, but most trash talkers are just that. Just ignore him and 99% of the time he will go away.

London Rayne · 03-14-2011, 06:14 PM

I get this crap all the time lol. My response is usually, "Go right ahead dipsh3t, I am not the one with the IP address that traces right back to my freaking house. Oh, and I know every cop in NOLA, so be my guest."

Also, keep in mind "escorting" is NOT illegal....hooking is. I had to call the cops on a provider for some SERIOUS issues and the first thing they said was, "We don't care what you do for a living, that's not why we are here....she broke the law, not you."

As long as your face is not right there, they really can't do a thing to you. Make sure you SCREEN like crazy because it is very possible this nut could have a buddy of his go in and try to rip you off. These guys are seriously wack sometimes!