When nothing goes as planned

[offshoredrilling]

When nothing goes as planned

And I mean not a thing. The plan was simple. She ask me move a bed. So I say ok I will call you after dinner. After dinner I log on to eccie and read a bit. I may have even posted. I call, I'm painting but come on over and call me when you get to the street. Oh and take your time and bring me a beer. So a bit more reading and log off. Check the fridge for beer. Take 2 of the last three. Put in bed of truck, pack with snow to keep cold and from moving. So far so good.

Get there and can not find a good place to park. Lots of street parking for cars. But a 4 door 8' box pickup is not a car. Find a spot around the corner. take it. Before we go on some history. I am hard of hearing. I think it goes with my very hard head. No she has one also. Few weeks ago had to see Doc for a hearing problem. And she gave me a fix. And hearing is coming back to normal not good. Not there yet. She talks to soft and way to fast for me. Now we have the same cell carrier. Yet she will agree with me. Are cells hate each other. Its been like this for years(even with new phones) but today was a wee extra. She called when I was at wegmans I could not hear a thing. Tell her I will call back when done at wegmans, she text back that would be good. So when home and all is put away. Relax and call her back. Now she can not hear me. Hang up she calls me back and we make are plans. I tell her this only happens with her. she tells me the same. So any time I say one called the other, this is how it goes.

So I call her to tell her I am here. I get, you have to wait. Was trying to get a old love seat out and stuck in the stairway. So now you know moving to a 2nd floor. Phone flickers a few times like trying to get a call. So I walk over to house to see a very glad that is over landlord. At the door she yells to come up(hay i hear that). So when I get to her I see a provider in grubby close painting a way. But some how still looking hot to my eyes with paint in her hair, and on her hands, with one cute drop on her nose. Its strange when you like a female. They would look good to you even in a burlap bag. Take a look at the computer you fixed it. Its your fault it does not work. Well I find 3 files filling up the hard drive. I fix it on 12/26/2010. File dates 12/27/2010. mmmmm and its my fault. Tell her this. Well ok it will forever be my fault. She sees it working. but for the rest of the night it worked for me. But stopped for her. It was working all to well before I left.

But now is the time to get bed. Off we go, having a good talk as we go. And I miss the exit. Turn around and get off at the right exit. Pull up to gate at storage unit. She gets out to unlock the gate. Yells what time you got. 2 min after the gate will let you out but not in. I bet you know, Its all my fault.

Nice drive back to her place. We go to the bath room she pee's and leaves the room. I pee, zip up and before I flush she calls for me I turn. And for the first time in my life, cell jumps from my pocket. Do I have to tell you wher it landed. I say NOT. So I find self one hand drying a cell. Other working the keyboard of what did she do now. As she is painting again. I get computer working again. And then the cell. And now she wants sex. I race to the bedroom and down to underwear. She walks in with computer and ask me to fix the TV. Well I never got the TV to work. But now I sit with the computer again. she moved it, tried it, errrrrrrr. Dam this does not need a x computer tech, not even a current one, it needs a priest. But before done!!!

Its time to pick something from a friend out of the blue. Now as I almost miss a turn, as I have hard time hearing. She says, and she will say it was me . You and I may as well be married, you never listen to me. ahhhhhhhhh help me!!!

So lets jump back at her place again. I will not talk about the ride back. I ask it was just you and me that hit that pot. What do you mean. Phone smells funny, as in not good. Yes just us as she calls to test it. mmmm It has never worked so well her phone with a call to mine. But now she ready's her bath to see others. mmmm no hot water. So it must be sex time again. Well she is frustrated, and I am frustrated. And I am here to tell ya all the parts work well for a female. Even if frustrated. For a male . But she is cool and we get her done. Off to give her a sponge bath. Other are coming. So glad hot water is the landlords problem. She has dinner. One last look and the computer is still working and almost out the door with me. Just before she locked it I remember I gave her some to buy that dinner. But needed to leave a bit more. There now done and off to home to write this. mmmm call her from home yup computer and my phone still work. Phone smells strange, but works.

So if you saw a provider that was a bit off her normal. Blame OFF SHORE DRILLING. I know she will. She used the "M" word, I counter with I will review. We got over it, and all is well. Don't worry I will get that bed there for you all.

And all I/we ask is before that next thread about MR Hobby did this, Or Miss Provider did that. Remember this thread. And then start your thread or post.

Now I have read her other reviews. And so I will tell you. All will try to put there best foot forward. Till you get to know each other ALL TO WELL.

OSD
thank you for your support
PS: If you did not like the bed, remember, its all my falt, sorry.
PS II that line "The beard sounds like more fun than a remote control!"
I am so glad I trimmed it down to normal. And Santa beard not till she forgets that line.

PS III And that beer. She put in the freezer, not the fridge. One blew the cap. Frozen beer mess. One guess at who is at fault.

When she get this place all set up. All will be good again. Till then, just blame that OSD guy.

[Stud Daddy]

You really need to find another woman, get a hearing aid, both or learn how to say NO! gracefully - easier said than done.

You know that rule about nice guys!
Hope things get better for you - soon.

[offshoredrilling]

I will gladly see her again. May I shake your hand for missing the point of this all. mmmm did I wash my hands after using cell . I forgive you for not seeing the point. till you know me better I'm nuts hehehe

Can you tell me who I should see?

She put up with allot of crap from me.......

[ben dover]

OSD, Always love your stories....you can't make this stuff up! BD

[Niktu]

so this is the life of a resident philosopher?

have you considered teaming up with NB to publish your memoirs? you could use some of the proceeds to buy her a new computer

[offshoredrilling]

Originally Posted by ben dover

OSD, Always love your stories....you can't make this stuff up! BD

Every one has a bad day or two. Once she gets place all set, all will be good again. And willing to bet most will not see the stress this move has been for her. It always the ones we know best that take the heat from each other.

Originally Posted by Niktu

so this is the life of a resident philosopher?

have you considered teaming up with NB to publish your memoirs? you could use some of the proceeds to buy her a new computer

resident philosopher: going back to the days of typewriters, and when I use to fix them. Just another loose nut on a keyboard!!!!!!!!

team up with: Why what has he ever done to me!

publish: using this board as my file backup.

new computer: My IBM 600X thinkpad is much older than her Dell. mmmm delete next thought. I like her, lets keep the fun.

edit: I just can not get over how cute she was with paint roller in her hand. As she was telling me off.

mmmm book title: behind the illusion Na close yet na!

dang, shake my hand this cell is still working!!!!

what a postwhore I am Edit II

Kermit the frog will tell you it is not easy being GREEN
I will tell you, It ant easy being on my short list

mmmm not one provider reply as to the azz I am
Ok I want a count after you had a oops reading this are you pissed or LOL

[offshoredrilling]

called her today, re plan. crap just got up. Took a nap and over sleep. Missed her call when I was to call Bush teeth. Do the 3 S's, ok for got 2, I do not shave. Call her back. Will leave soon to meet her. Wish me luck.
It not her its me. I getting to old for this carp. I need to change my MO(mode of operation) yet again. With age come adjustments.


every wanted to reply ya I f#$%&$% l$%& y$% too. I find you can get away with it, when some one needs something from you.
time to go, Dang I feel like #$%^.

[offshoredrilling]

Originally Posted by offshoredrilling

every wanted to reply ya

ever!!!! not every

Anyways lets put this to bed.

So off to the storage unit I go. Today we are to met there. On the way she calls me. Something about a small delay. "wish me luck" would have been better wish "us" luck. But she made it. I was in a lot next door I see her pull in and drive up behind her. She puts the code in for gate. And at storage unit. This worked out much better as she wanted more that just the bed. She loads up her SUV. And I load truck with the bed. As we bicker as buddy's. As we are working and poking fun of each other she asks "how many times have you moved". She won, and she knows it. If you can dish it out, you have to take it. I lost it was fun and off we go.

Back at her place. It was not easy to get the box springs up that stairway. But we made it. I went to bathroom, check cell, in pants pocket. Much safer over coat pocket. And we go for the mattress. When that was done it was yup I got to change my MO. I need ben dover or another guy teach me how to take better pic's. Moving, flat tires etc, is to much for this old boy. We start to unload her SUV. But I had to move truck as the guy down stairs had to get out. Remember no off road parking at this incall. I passed at my pay, and we bid see ya latter. But she did hint more at a later date if this place work out. PLEASE let this place work out ok.

Off to the AC for coffee, football and mess with Cher's mind. (see other reviews). Latter off for some BCD's.

She told me she gave up on the TV. and loaded another to try. I did not ask about computer. I ran like a rat, as it is best to go when the going is good. That will be another day!!!!!!!!

Enjoy the bed all.


Yes!!!!!!!!!
Edit: At the AC owner told me she saw wife 1. Later she and a buddy of mind going at each other as if married. I yell will you two take it easy. I just left wife 2 to get away from that. Its a inside running joke. Hope wife 3 calls sunday. As I dream of the BCD time with not yet but working on wife 4.

[BrookeButtons]

haha this story was wayy too much. Glad you were there to help a lady friend out, even if you did encounter about every possible delay that could have happened!

Hows the phone by the way? Still smelling?

[offshoredrilling]

Cell, not smelling as bad, its working great. Hope this place works out for her. And looking forward to more normal visit.

Moving is a pain.
Men do not watch or read assembly instructions this link may be my answer for me getting older. Looks to be easy to move, and fun. But she will be the only one I would buy one for. At this time not taking any new help to move clients!!!!

edit: watching assembly instructions again. Just to make sure I can ahhhh handle this. After all I am just a man!!!!!!!!!!

[BrookeButtons]

Darn...where were you two weeks ago when I moved :P