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Comedy Central All your funny stuff goes here.

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Old 09-03-2015, 04:20 PM   #1
tia travels
Let's Have A Great Year!
 
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User ID: 1650
Join Date: Jul 28, 2009
Location: Indianapolis & Touring
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Posts: 10,589
My ECCIE Reviews
Default Short jokes

Q: What is the leading cause in death with lesbians?
A: Hair balls.

Q: How do you know if a blonde has been sending e-mail?
A: You see a bunch of envelopes stuffed into the disk drive

Q: What can Life Savers do that men cannot?
A: Come in five flavors

Q: What is good on pizza but bad on pussy?
A: Crust

Q: Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
A: Because Kermit likes sweet and sour pork

Q: How can you tell if you have a high sperm count?
A: If your girlfriend chews before swallowing

Q: What do you get when you get Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Dough
Boy together?
A: A red headed bitch with a yeast infection

Q: How do you piss off Winnie The Pooh?
A: By sticking your finger in his honey

Q: What is the ultimate rejection?
A: When your masturbating and your hand falls asleep

Q: What did Bill Clinton say to Monica?
A: I told you to lick my erection, not wreck my election.

Q: What does pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common?
A: Both can smell it but can't eat it

Q: What do you call a blonde with pigtails?
A: A blow job with handle bars

Q: What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates?
A: A mobile sperm bank.

Q: What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill over her head?
A: All you can eat for under a buck.

Q: What do you get when you mix a rooster with a telephone pole?
A: A 30ft cock that wants to reach out and touch someone

Q. What's the difference between a golf ball and a woman's G-spot?
A. A guy will take twenty minutes to look for a golf ball.

Q: How do you get your wife to scream while you are having an
orgasm?
A: Call her and tell her where you are.

Q: What's the difference between light and hard?
A: You can go to sleep with a light on.

Q: What's the difference between dark and hard?
A: It stays dark all night.

Q: What's the difference between a BONUS and a PENIS?
A: Your wife will blow your bonus.

Q: What's the difference between a wife and a job?
A: After 20 years, the job STILL sucks.

Q: What is the definition of wicker box?
A: It's what Elmer Fudd wants to do to Madonna.

Q: How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist?
A: A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.

Q: What is the biggest problem for an atheist?
A: No one to talk to during orgasm.

Q: What is Rodeo Sex?
A: Well, it's where your wife is on all fours, you are firmly
ensconced from the rear with a breast in each hand, and you
say to her: "This is the way your sister likes it too."
You have eight seconds to stay in the saddle.

Q: If you are having sex with two women and one more woman walks
in, what do you have?
A: Divorce proceedings, most likely.

Q: Why do married men like blowjobs so much?
A: 15 minutes of silence.

Q: what do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common?
A: a wet nose
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Old 09-03-2015, 06:34 PM   #2
Guest021817-2
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Encounters: 17
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Thanks Tia for the laughs!
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Old 09-05-2015, 08:21 AM   #3
AnnieDazy
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Join Date: May 12, 2013
Location: India
Posts: 55
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Its really awesome joke.
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