Hobby perspective after some years?

[pyramider]

By that logic I should be reaping a shit load of taint.

[Jessica Jade]

Originally Posted by DarthDVader

Its true that takes effort to keep things positive Jessica but I can assure you that you have your reward already ...
From your posts I can tell you're a sweetheart ... and many people can see that too ...
I know also you like all of us, have a mental list of people you like and people you don't care for ... don't you?
Undoubtedly we reap what we sow ...

For sure. But the people I don't think I will like, I respectably don't see. I've been VERY fortunate to get along with and genuinely like about 95% of every client I've seen (don't ask me how that happened, trust me it baffles me). Some I get more excited to see than others but I have had pretty good experiences with everyone. I mostly only hear about bad or extremely uncomfortable situations. Rarely have I experienced it. I guess that's part of reaping what I sow so I'll just continue to put out positive energy and stay away from the drama. Far, far, away lol.

[!!Sexy Erotic Morgan]

So, how do you guys really feel about us? Some of these perspectives are harboring on resentful, which is a little scary. I have heard many horror stories from my clients and I am very sympathetic to the guys that only know about Eros. They are the best clients and that site is real roll of the dice.

You guys have no one to blame but yourselves for your bad experiences. This website offers so much information that allows you to know, almost for a fact, that a provider is legitimate before you call her. There are literally hundreds of beautiful providers that are known to give good service to choose from. If you decide to bypass all of them and call some random girl from the Welcome Wagon or Backpage with bad pics and no reviews, you are asking for trouble. Obviously, you get off on the thrill of walking blindly into potentially dangerous situations. You can not come back and say providers in general are bad because you enjoy the company of bad providers. You are keeping that bad element in business by supporting them.

If you want to have nothing but good experiences as a client, it is quite possible. Stop trolling the Welcome Wagon and support your real, professional providers!

[DarthDVader]

Well SEM, The purpose of this thread was to share our experiences after years of hobbying ... from whats been posted I cant find comments to be resentful ... ... As I stated in my OP, as a newbie, I went through all the thrill of using the WW, BP, CL, and other sites that didn't bring a good rate of satisfactory outcome thus the horror stories -I could tell some- ...
The real companions are the ones that have clear why we men hobby ...
Men are the consumers and ladies the providers ...
We have to choose our product wisely -analogy made with respect-...

Originally Posted by !!Sexy Erotic Morgan

So, how do you guys really feel about us? Some of these perspectives are harboring on resentful, which is a little scary. I have heard many horror stories from my clients and I am very sympathetic to the guys that only know about Eros. They are the best clients and that site is real roll of the dice.

You guys have no one to blame but yourselves for your bad experiences. This website offers so much information that allows you to know, almost for a fact, that a provider is legitimate before you call her. There are literally hundreds of beautiful providers that are known to give good service to choose from. If you decide to bypass all of them and call some random girl from the Welcome Wagon or Backpage with bad pics and no reviews, you are asking for trouble. Obviously, you get off on the thrill of walking blindly into potentially dangerous situations. You can not come back and say providers in general are bad because you enjoy the company of bad providers. You are keeping that bad element in business by supporting them.

If you want to have nothing but good experiences as a client, it is quite possible. Stop trolling the Welcome Wagon and support your real, professional providers!

[DarthDVader]

How much taint have you sown may I ask?

Originally Posted by pyramider

By that logic I should be reaping a shit load of taint.

[NearHauteRed]

Originally Posted by !!Sexy Erotic Morgan

So, how do you guys really feel about us? Some of these perspectives are harboring on resentful, which is a little scary. I have heard many horror stories from my clients and I am very sympathetic to the guys that only know about Eros. They are the best clients and that site is real roll of the dice.

You guys have no one to blame but yourselves for your bad experiences. This website offers so much information that allows you to know, almost for a fact, that a provider is legitimate before you call her. There are literally hundreds of beautiful providers that are known to give good service to choose from. If you decide to bypass all of them and call some random girl from the Welcome Wagon or Backpage with bad pics and no reviews, you are asking for trouble. Obviously, you get off on the thrill of walking blindly into potentially dangerous situations. You can not come back and say providers in general are bad because you enjoy the company of bad providers. You are keeping that bad element in business by supporting them.

If you want to have nothing but good experiences as a client, it is quite possible. Stop trolling the Welcome Wagon and support your real, professional providers!

I do not think guys feel all providers are bad, but I do have to agree that there is good and bad everywhere. Unfortunately, when I provider gives a hobbyist a bad experience be it BCD or TCB wise or both, then we tend to lump all providers in the same basket to a degree or at least speak in general terms of providers like that. As far as being the only ones to blame for bad experiences, well, I have to disagree with you as I have personally had multiple well established popular providers who have given me a bad experience or two (NCNS, YMMV drama, ect.) before I wised up and decided not to respond to them any longer and realize that some are baiting me to say something in response to them to get me hot water with the mods or other people. Unlike what some people may think, I do stay with the providers who do have a good reputation TCB and BCD skill wise, but seeing a girl that is in the WW every so often is not a bad thing, besides, everyone had to start from zero at one point, but keep in mind that no matter how long they have been providing or how popular they are, you still are never going to know 100% of what you are going to get.

Most guys get involved with the hobby because they want whatever they want BCD, not have to worry about personal problems for the time they are with a provider and pay the donation rate, then leave. Some guys, especially on this site, may or may not see providers BCD, but they are always looking for an axe to grind and be condescending to others, be it because others are and they want to be in with the popular crowd on this site or they just pick and choose who they want to be an asshole to. And most of the time, those types are the one who in their posts do a lot of speculating and assuming without really knowing anything about a person or a subject being talked about stating it as fact, not to mention, they question just about everything a particular person they do not like to bait him/her into a piss match. Some providers are very much into drama and maybe they know it or maybe they don't, and yes, some are the well established popular ones, what kind of hobbyist would want anything to do with those providers personal drama, likes to argue about everything, knows it all and makes sure you know it, telling you if do not have her opinion, you are wrong AND pay them a donation as well to put up with that?

My philosophy is simple: I do my research on who I would like to see, contact them via their preferred contact method if they have one, I make an appointment if she is available when I can see her, go see her, have fun, no drama, bullshit, YMMV card or going through the motions noticed by me, just a great service with awesome IOP and getting to do the activities I want to do with said provider, when my time is up, I pay her donation rate, perhaps tip if it calls for it, kiss goodbye and maybe a text, email or phone call either a few hours or the next day afterward thanking her for giving me a wonderful time and looking forward to see her again.

[Guest092216]

Originally Posted by DarthDVader

How much taint have you sown may I ask?

Episiotomies?? I have sometimes wondered if pyramider is an OB/GYN in real life considering his obsession with taint. Lol.

If he is, I bet he's a pretty damn cool one though.

[DarthDVader]

True, there are good and bad providers as there are good and bad hobbyists ...
The Newbies make newbie mistakes, but they will eventually learn ...
The problem is the hobbyists that have "experience" and are using that experience to lure, harass or take advantage of new or inexperienced girls ...

A question for you NHR: weren't you just recently caught in a series of lies and you came back with a new handle because you were banned? I think the moral credibility of your post is in question ...

Originally Posted by NearHauteRed

I do not think guys feel all providers are bad, but I do have to agree that there is good and bad everywhere. Unfortunately, when I provider gives a hobbyist a bad experience be it BCD or TCB wise or both, then we tend to lump all providers in the same basket to a degree or at least speak in general terms of providers like that. As far as being the only ones to blame for bad experiences, well, I have to disagree with you as I have personally had multiple well established popular providers who have given me a bad experience or two (NCNS, YMMV drama, ect.) before I wised up and decided not to respond to them any longer and realize that some are baiting me to say something in response to them to get me hot water with the mods or other people. Unlike what some people may think, I do stay with the providers who do have a good reputation TCB and BCD skill wise, but seeing a girl that is in the WW every so often is not a bad thing, besides, everyone had to start from zero at one point, but keep in mind that no matter how long they have been providing or how popular they are, you still are never going to know 100% of what you are going to get.

Most guys get involved with the hobby because they want whatever they want BCD, not have to worry about personal problems for the time they are with a provider and pay the donation rate, then leave. Some guys, especially on this site, may or may not see providers BCD, but they are always looking for an axe to grind and be condescending to others, be it because others are and they want to be in with the popular crowd on this site or they just pick and choose who they want to be an asshole to. Some providers are very much into drama and maybe they know it or maybe they don't, and yes, some are the well established popular ones, what kind of hobbyist would want anything to do with those providers personal drama, likes to argue about everything, knows it all and makes sure you know it AND pay them a donation as well to put up with that?

My philosophy is simple: I do my research on who I would like to see, contact them via their preferred contact method if they have one, I make an appointment if she is available when I can see her, go see her, have fun, no drama, bullshit, YMMV card or going through the motions noticed by me, just a great service with awesome IOP and getting to do the activities I want to do with said provider, when my time is up, I pay her donation rate, perhaps tip if it calls for it, kiss goodbye and maybe a text, email or phone call either a few hours or the next day afterward thanking her for giving me a wonderful time and looking forward to see her again.

[Rehke]

Yes and no.

I think I'd call it a shared responsibility. Yes, guys should be doing their research, listening to what the old hands have to say, learning from their mistakes and if done right, you can pretty much get by with mostly positive experiences.

And there are those providers, regardless of where they advertise, who do have their issues. Each individual is responsible for their own actions.

One thing I, as a man, grapple with...and I know some women do as well, is what I am attracted to. There are a ton of fabulous ladies with stellar reputations that I just simply am not attracted to. And I have learned that there are some things I'm really good at being attracted to.

In my case, I took a some conscious decisions to study and understand what I was getting myself into and really look at how things played out. I think I've gotten past that point.

But can I ever really change what gets me going? I don't know, and likely not. Some guys are variety driven, they want to experience it all, they are about the variety. I'm not that kind. I have a specific type. And it's based partially on physical characteristics and partially on psychological aspects.

I try to own my own shit as much as I can. But I do have to point out that there is a lot of fake from providers as well. A ton of the drama on this board is generated and sustained by how females are acting both toward each other and to men.

I will also point out there are studies showing quite a bit of misogyny and androgyny in the hobby. Some of the perspectives I've heard from providers is every bit as scary. It is a fact of the hobby that one should be aware of and cautious of at all times.

It takes two to tango.

Originally Posted by !!Sexy Erotic Morgan

So, how do you guys really feel about us? Some of these perspectives are harboring on resentful, which is a little scary. I have heard many horror stories from my clients and I am very sympathetic to the guys that only know about Eros. They are the best clients and that site is real roll of the dice.

You guys have no one to blame but yourselves for your bad experiences. This website offers so much information that allows you to know, almost for a fact, that a provider is legitimate before you call her. There are literally hundreds of beautiful providers that are known to give good service to choose from. If you decide to bypass all of them and call some random girl from the Welcome Wagon or Backpage with bad pics and no reviews, you are asking for trouble. Obviously, you get off on the thrill of walking blindly into potentially dangerous situations. You can not come back and say providers in general are bad because you enjoy the company of bad providers. You are keeping that bad element in business by supporting them.

If you want to have nothing but good experiences as a client, it is quite possible. Stop trolling the Welcome Wagon and support your real, professional providers!

[Guest092216]

Rehke, so far I find you to be very aware. At least you have taken the time and effort to honestly reflect on things and displayed the self-confidence to share it. I would love to see the person who took a cheap shot at you earlier on this thread actually make a valid arguement to support their attempt at discrediting you.

Yes, there is hatred on both sides. Some women provide because they hate men and want to get an "upperhand". Similarly, some men hobby because they hate women and want to get an "upperhand". That type of IOP (illusion of power) is present on both sides of the fence.

Unfortunately, time is the ONLY relaible form of measure when it comes to dealing with anyone. Time is the only thing that will show you what someone has really intended to do with their actions. Time takes patience. Most people don't have patience so that's why we all end up finding out the hard way at some point.

You never know until you know.

[DarthDVader]

Yes, it takes two to Tango ... one of my favorite quotes ...
... again I quoted two interesting ideas from your quote ...

Originally Posted by Rehke

One thing I, as a man, grapple with...and I know some women do as well, is what I am attracted to. There are a ton of fabulous ladies with stellar reputations that I just simply am not attracted to.

I will also point out there are studies showing quite a bit of misogyny and androgyny in the hobby.

It takes two to tango.

[Rehke]

Originally Posted by DarthDVader

Yes, it takes two to Tango ... one of my favorite quotes ...
... again I quoted two interesting ideas from your quote ...

I'm not sure I'm quite ready to delve publicly into the depths of my attractions and what I've figured out is the root of those. Other than to to it is crap carried from my youth and it has every bit as much to do with psychological as it does physical characteristics.

I've also observed this same thing with women.

The liking for the bad boy/bad girl, and the feeling that we can somehow bring out the better side of that person is a powerful emotional driver of choices.

I think it's vital to finding a happy way through life to know what you are doing and why. If you cannot do that, you risk spending a lot of time confused about why you keep doing the same stupid things and getting the same shitty results. It really does prove the point about insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

Never is any human totally sane in all areas of life all the time.

The comment about only having ourselves to blame for our experiences does bring out the fact that there are alternative choices that we could make for better experiences.

But life isn't that black & white. I've experimented with some of those alternative choices and well, there are some types I just can't get into. So, in truth, my choices are limited by myself internally.

Sometimes a partner in the tango is your own subconscious.

On the other hand, there are choices I can make that mitigate the potential downsides of indulging in my preferences. Here is where listening to the old hands is a key!

Much of the hobby advice available is geared to protecting the hoobbiest who is in some sort of committed relationship and engages in hobbying on the side. It is meant to allow one to protect oneself from outing of the extra-curricular activities. It also blankets one's identity and limits one's involvement in the personal lives and drama that are the frequent domain of the provider.

There are "rules" that providers have to protect their personal lives as well.

These things exist for a damn good reason!

I've managed to break most of those rules in my experience. Some of it was simply ignorance when I was younger in the hobby. Some of it was simply not being in a relationship and not having that personal issue to protect. Some of it was poor choice related to how I went about my life. Some of it was deliberate choice in meeting other needs. But it is valid, useful and good advice. If you ignore it, you do so at your own peril. There will be a cost.

These days, I do follow quite a bit of it, even in civilian and sugar dating. I use a Google Voice # and a separate e-mail for those activities. I establish a boundary in front of my personal life and someone enters that only after certain requirements are met.

Most of all, I have learned to take on only what is mine. I still do help from time to time, but not like I used to, with equal value in return and only within established parameters of what I can do. I state the costs of such help up front and I do not seek to use that to manipulate or take advantage. I do take limited risks and when the investment does not pan out, I walk the fuck away.

Surprisingly, after all this time and everything, I'm more honest, more direct, and have better personal boundaries.

I will also say this...that in every experience I have had, what has been given as advice from older to younger hobbiests has always borne out true, without one single exception.

[JohnnyYanks]

Originally Posted by thathottnurse

... I would love to see the person who took a cheap shot at you earlier on this thread actually make a valid arguement to support their attempt at discrediting you ...

What a fellow won't do to get the attention of a hot nurse.

It was no "cheap shot," it was a comment to his post. And I stand by it.

And it was not an "attempt to discredit." Why would you think that? It sounds very harsh. Is that what you do? Someone you know very well?

As to the OP's original question: I find my experiences, while mostly positive, have caused me to raise my expectations. To seek a higher level of service for my dollars. Some ladies I have seen, and enjoyed, I would not consider now.

[Rehke]

It was terse. But it also led to an interesting exchange of PM's and it's safe to say no ill will was intended.

I really like the comment about raised expectations. This is also something that I've gleaned from my hobby experience, in that I do have a much higher bar for my male-female relationships than I used to.

I've probably spattered enough personal details about myself to make my reasons obvious, and I'd be interesting in hearing what about your experiences led you to that?

Originally Posted by JohnnyYanks

What a fellow won't do to get the attention of a hot nurse.

It was no "cheap shot," it was a comment to his post. And I stand by it.

And it was not an "attempt to discredit." Why would you think that? It sounds very harsh. Is that what you do? Someone you know very well?

As to the OP's original question: I find my experiences, while mostly positive, have caused me to raise my expectations. To seek a higher level of service for my dollars. Some ladies I have seen, and enjoyed, I would not consider now.

[Guest092216]

Originally Posted by JohnnyYanks

What a fellow won't do to get the attention of a hot nurse.

It was no "cheap shot," it was a comment to his post. And I stand by it.

And it was not an "attempt to discredit." Why would you think that? It sounds very harsh. Is that what you do? Someone you know very well?

As to the OP's original question: I find my experiences, while mostly positive, have caused me to raise my expectations. To seek a higher level of service for my dollars. Some ladies I have seen, and enjoyed, I would not consider now.

Well, you said his level of unawares was staggering and then congratulated him. I just wanted to know why?

Nurse enjoys giving Yanks due attention