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12-26-2010, 02:59 PM
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#31
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Opinionated Curmudgeon
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"Choice"? A bit of a strawman, isn't it? I didn't see anyone saying that ladies shouldn't have that choice, just curious about the reason some make that choice. Read the first post.
Physical attraction also seems a bit of a strawman. While that is a frequent factor in the client's choice, conventional wisdom is that few escorts refuse to see clients whom they don't find attractive. (And I, personally, am very thankful for that. ) If a lady doesn't want to see AA clients because she doesn't find them attractive but also turns down white clients she doesn't find attractive, that's consistent. But how many ladies who refuse to see AA clients also refuse to see white clients who are unattractive?
I've been curious about this phenomenon, although discussions here rarely shed any light. Few ladies who have such a policy try to explain it (in some cases perhaps out of fear of allegations of racism?) and when they do, the explanations may not tell us much. For example
Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi4u
I don't like their mentality. That's my reason.
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she knows what "mentality" means to her, but I don't. Or whether it's based on personal experience rather than what others say. Or whether it's based on a lot of experience or a small enough sample that it might be considered a stereotype. Or whether it's seen as a matter of probability rather than absolutes -- "AA men don't always have that mentality, but based on experience, I'd assess the probability as 23% as opposed to 18% with other men.". *shrug* Who knows? And the ladies may feel that they aren't required to account for it.
Not that it really matters. The important thing for AA clients is whether a lady has such a policy, not why. The OP was just curious, as am I. But I don't expect discussing it here will help answer that curiosity.
Carry on.
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12-26-2010, 03:05 PM
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#32
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 55719
Join Date: Nov 21, 2010
Location: Somewhere in the east coast
Posts: 9,643
My ECCIE Reviews
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chevalier
Not that it really matters. The important thing for AA clients is whether a lady has such a policy, not why.
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I'm glad you know.
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12-26-2010, 03:07 PM
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#33
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 21422
Join Date: Apr 6, 2010
Location: New Orleans/Lakefront
Posts: 10,185
My ECCIE Reviews
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Bottom line is it's really none of anyone's business what or why another chooses to do what they do. I have more restrictions as to whom I will see than Welfare has participants...so what. As long as my clients and I are happy, that's all that matters.
I don't see anyone I don't want to, and I really don't care what anyone has to say about it lol. I am an independent last time I checked, and no surprise I am very low volume.
If a lady decides not to see certain people yes she shoud let them know upfront; however, I don't think it's very professional to list such things on a website. For one, it suggests that a level of attraction has to be present....to do what exactly? Talk? Eat? Or umm hmmm? If we are only selling time, it should not matter who walks through the door or whether or not we are attracted to him.
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12-26-2010, 03:13 PM
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#34
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 55719
Join Date: Nov 21, 2010
Location: Somewhere in the east coast
Posts: 9,643
My ECCIE Reviews
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Deleted.
ooH I won't comment too much on that London. If I don't like a certain group of people
because they're not attractive to me (and I didn't mean physically attractive) I won't see them.
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12-26-2010, 03:43 PM
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#35
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Opinionated Curmudgeon
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi4u
I'm glad you know.
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We all know that if a lady doesn't want to see a particular client, or if a client doesn't want to see a particular lady, there's no sense trying to convince them otherwise. Threads like this are just about curiosity, which we all have to one degree or another. Just as when some ladies ask (complain?) about those clients who won't see ladies of a certain body type or above/below a certain age.
None of us is entitled to an explanation, or obliged to satify others' curiosity. Just as none of us is entitled to an exemption from curiousity, and judgments, about what and why we do -- or need care about the curiosity or judgments. It would be as silly for me to care about your opinion as it would be for you to care about my opinion. Whose curiosity one wants to satisfy, and whose opinion one values, is entirely a matter of choice
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12-26-2010, 03:58 PM
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#36
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Upgraded Female Account
User ID: 24680
Join Date: Apr 29, 2010
Location: North Little Rock,Ar
Posts: 12,598
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+ 1 Bravo Chevalier !!
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12-26-2010, 04:11 PM
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#37
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 55719
Join Date: Nov 21, 2010
Location: Somewhere in the east coast
Posts: 9,643
My ECCIE Reviews
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chevalier
We all know that if a lady doesn't want to see a particular client, or if a client doesn't want to see a particular lady, there's no sense trying to convince them otherwise. Threads like this are just about curiosity, which we all have to one degree or another. Just as when some ladies ask (complain?) about those clients who won't see ladies of a certain body type or above/below a certain age.
None of us is entitled to an explanation, or obliged to satify others' curiosity. Just as none of us is entitled to an exemption from curiousity, and judgments, about what and why we do -- or need care about the curiosity or judgments. It would be as silly for me to care about your opinion as it would be for you to care about my opinion. Whose curiosity one wants to satisfy, and whose opinion one values, is entirely a matter of choice
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I agree
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12-26-2010, 04:46 PM
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#38
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Hot, Smooth & Full-Bodied
User ID: 57609
Join Date: Dec 2, 2010
Location: D.C. based (but I get around)
Posts: 7,917
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I don't think there's a constant preference of ladies not wanting to see AA/Black men vs just more "not caring" about putting it in their ads or on their sites. I mean there are guys who prefer not to see AA/Black women so I feel like so what. To be honest I don't get why so many flat out say no black guys because to be honest I've encountered an equal amount of d-bags white black asian etc lol. Maybe these ladies have had more/enough bad experiences with black/AA men more than anyone else so they maybe just kinda said eff it they put that disclaimer to avoid those who give them the most trouble.
AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON PACKAGES LOL. That is SUCH A MYTH. I've had/seen white men with some TREE TRUNKS okay and some black men with vienna sausages and asian men with pretty nice sized ones (I have an asian-white mixed regular with one I'd love to take home lol) so...yeah.
Quote:
Originally Posted by djarchae
i preface this discussion by conceding that i have been curious about "exchanging" for several years. i am in my late 30's and this year i finally crossed that threshold. two times only but its two more than this time last year.i am a reflection of a mother that is european and white, as well as an american father that is black. i was born in europe and spent half of my childhood there. the other half in the states. with the exception of the past 5 years, i have lived outside the u.s. i realize living in america pushes everyone to label and compartmentalize everything. i didnt learn the word 'biracial' until my 20's. my skin is tan and by default, because i currently live in texas, the easiest box for others to put me in is the 'black' box. i suppose i am black when in the u.s. (the irony here is that many people accuse others[of all races] as 'playing the race card'. in my case, someone has picked up my card and played it for me!)
so the first woman i decide to contact stated on her page " No A/A or African American men". i didnt even think about it at the time and after a couple of conversations on the phone she asked me to text or email some pics of me and i said of course and i sent her a few and after looking at them she called me and was pissed that i lied and that i couldnt read the fine print on her page.she actually thought i was duping her.anyway i say to her i am not african american, and even if i was, i wouldnt use that term because it is WAY too vague. for example, take a white couple from south africa that decides to marry and have kids in the u.s. their kids will be african american and they will be white. see what i mean? its too inclusive. that aside, i wasnt trying to be a smart-alec or argumentative or difficult, what i was doing was telling her that i wasnt knowingly misleading her.all my friends describe me as biracial when they are decribing my background to others. i suppose its like obama, who has been bestowed as america's first black president. its like acknowledging both races in his families history would be too confusing....
ANYWAY, the whole point of me starting thread is to ask a question that has been the elephant in the room everytime i surf sites like this one.
so, is there something i am missing here as to why there seems to be a constant preference of no "A/A" or 'blacks'. and of course i have no problem with a woman OR a man preferring or not preferring whatever they choose. THAT part i get, i just want to know why a (not large) steady amount of women that do post dealbreakers, 90 percent is always directed towards black men. so please when you reply, understand i am asking with genuine curiosity because its obviously a reason that i am unaware of because i am newish. whats funny is when i first noticed it i didnt think racial at all but more stereotyping because i assumed that these women were afraid of the large packages.it cant be that because the sample size is too big. thanks for reading the whole thing and i look forward to the knowledge that is about to be dropped by you all. peace
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12-26-2010, 04:56 PM
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#39
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Hot, Smooth & Full-Bodied
User ID: 57609
Join Date: Dec 2, 2010
Location: D.C. based (but I get around)
Posts: 7,917
My ECCIE Reviews
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That can go for men looking for ladies too. When I read a man prefers hispanic/latinas I think are we talking ZOE SALDANA/Lala Vasquez aka your "blacks" or J-Lo/Rosario Dawson aka your mixed variety or Shakira/Christina Aguilera aka your white variety.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spirit13
My 2 cents is this: The term "African / American" to me infers that one of your parents is a citizen of Africa and the other an America. Oddly enough there are British living in areas of Africa that are sovereign areas OF Great Britain and those people have white skin.
If you were to slice ME up I am English, Irish, Dutch, and the other half is Texan.
Skin color has NOTHING to do with nationality.
There are black people born and raised in France and other countries. They are NOT African Americans.
If a lady does not wish to see Blacks, state THAT, do not classify them by their nationality... do so by skin color and lets see how business dwindles.
Besides, its all pink in the middle and from all the porn I have seen, "cum" is on one color anyway....
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12-26-2010, 05:01 PM
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#40
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Hot, Smooth & Full-Bodied
User ID: 57609
Join Date: Dec 2, 2010
Location: D.C. based (but I get around)
Posts: 7,917
My ECCIE Reviews
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You ever been asked to speak spanish to prove you're hispanic? lol
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andrea Davis
Another comment That may have been forgotten is that some white men won't see African American providers if they see African American Men. Also their are a lot of African American men that won't see Afircan American providers either.
One time a provider friend referred me to a client. When he showed up he let me know that he wasn't going to be paying me because I was black. I said hold up, I am from the Dominican Republic and my dad is from Haiti. He said he would never pay a black provider that he should get it for free because he was cute. Even though he had previously paid my white provider friend a week ago. I was so mad and told him to take his $300 and shove it. I'm not even attracted to black men. I like my men blonde, blue eyed and tan. But she said he was a great lay and so I gave it a chance.
We all have our likes.
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12-26-2010, 06:59 PM
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#41
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 42516
Join Date: Aug 30, 2010
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 1,202
My ECCIE Reviews
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi4u
This is why I heart you Angel. Very well said!
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Thank you, sugar!
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12-26-2010, 07:54 PM
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#42
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Nov 17, 2010
Location: South Florida
Posts: 190
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I could swear you posted this thread on the indy board 2 weeks ago. I guess your trying to get answers from a different crowd...
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12-26-2010, 08:12 PM
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#43
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Account Disabled
User ID: 5290
Join Date: Jan 4, 2010
Location: Chickasha
Posts: 6,111
My ECCIE Reviews
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This will be my first time posting my true opinion on this one....
I do not post, or say that I do not, or will not see AA or black men. 1yr 9months into this 'Hobby' I have seen men of all races, EXCEPT for what we consider to be black. I have seen 1 bi-racial (half black) gentleman, and he was wonderful.
I think it has a lot to do with stereo types. Do I want to see a black man with sagging jeans, and gold chains around his neck? HELL NO! I've seen white men do this too....more common with the black, I admit!
I have the personal beleif that the price tag we have put on ourselves, and the screening that us ladies do, weeds out about 98% of the 'undesirables'....I just don't feel as though it is worth the concern some girls put into it.
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12-26-2010, 08:20 PM
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#44
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Valued Poster
Join Date: May 22, 2010
Location: On the planet I think.
Posts: 8,728
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Listen this is friggin America. See who you want. Don't see who you don't want to see. It's hard just getting by with all the PC bullshit we have today. If someone doesn't want to see me I don't get hurt or cry. With 300 plus million people in the US and over half of them women I think we can all find someone that we like.
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12-27-2010, 03:56 PM
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#45
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Jul 22, 2010
Location: Sensual Bliss
Posts: 377
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I find those "no black men" statements to be repugnant, but I'd prefer to know up front, then to find out at the door. Far more ladies will see me than not.
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