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09-08-2010, 12:44 AM
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#1
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BANNED
Join Date: Feb 10, 2010
Location: Northshore
Posts: 60
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Hobbiest as time goes on, do you lose the thrill or become more Jaded ?
With any relationship as time goes on people come to the point where the "Thrill is Gone" or become Jaded so to speek. Where the hobby is not a relationship with a specific individual persay it is a relationship in spirit between one person and many other individuals they have choosen to engage personally with.
I would imagine that most dawgs that find the hobby in the begining feel like a kid in a candy shop. They never imagined there was this many beautiful women of all colors, creeds, and talents just a phone call away. Everytime they look they see a young hottie just like the girl next door, or a girl that reminds them of someone they always fantisized about, but just like the first time they saw their hot girlfriend or SO, and thought to themselves nothin could be better than this, eventually the relationship cooled and you began looking somewhere else.
So the question is, as time goes on and you experience the hobby more and more fulfilling all of the fantasies you once thought were only dreams, are you losing the thrill the hobby gave you in the beginning are you becoming more jaded towards sex in general, do you find yourself turning the page on providers you once considered your ATF, because you know its there for the taking when ever you want it just like the wife or your girlfriend?
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09-08-2010, 01:07 AM
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#2
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 21422
Join Date: Apr 6, 2010
Location: New Orleans/Lakefront
Posts: 10,185
My ECCIE Reviews
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I don't think anything you pay for can be as rewarding as having someone truly love you for who you are, for free. It is like a drug here and when it wears off, there comes a down time we all have to deal with.
I think it takes a strong will for a married man to be able to keep seperating love and sex, and still be a devoted husband in all the other ways. I think it takes an even stronger will for a provider to be able to see men she does not know for money, and not feel some type of remorse or guilt.
It's all about how you let your mind and your emotions rule over you, and just how far you allow yourself to get caught up. I can't imagine doing this forever, and expecting to have a normal relationship with anyone in my personal life at the same time.
Moderation is key.
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09-08-2010, 08:33 AM
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#3
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 14292
Join Date: Feb 12, 2010
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,920
My ECCIE Reviews
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I think everyone gets burned out on something. Hence the word variety. Whether the variety is women, food, drinking whatever after having done it repeatedly for a time you need a break.
Now speaking for myself I find that I could not do this as a regular job day in and day out. So that is why I am considered "utr" or "selective". Like any job if you do it 24/7 as in go to the office bring it home with you and see it in your sleep yes you would get tired of it.
So Under The Radar as far as what you are saying yes I think you would get tired of something if you see/do too much of it. Nothing says tho that if you take a break from it that you may want to go back to it later.
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09-08-2010, 11:13 AM
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#4
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Ambassador
Join Date: Jan 5, 2010
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 2,184
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All I can comment on is my experience. Your question leaves two options more fullfilling living my fantasies or jaded toward sex. I usually view most concepts in life on a straight line one end being blissful fantastic sex all the time and the other end being jaded, want no part of it any more. In most things I fall in between the two ends, I try hard to get to that blissful place each time but as with life most things are not all blissful and fantastic.
I am neither in total bliss nor jaded, I am at peace with my sexual adventures and undertakings. The hobby has fullfilled many fanatasies for me and I am very appreciative to those that helped me out. Before I hobbied I never experienced CIM, coitus and then finishing oral, COT, COF, watching in mirrors while standing getting a BBBJ, two ladies at once, the list can go on. Damn kinda makes my married sex sound real boring, and reality is it was very boring but I did not know it. She had so many inhibitions it was nuts, but I agree with London, that finding that love for another perosn so special that the sex act did not matter to me. I loved that woman with every thing that was me for many years. Ultimately and in time I would desire to find that connection again and yes I would be monogamous, but not in the cards for me right now. I have not been divorced long enough yet to want to settle down and truthfully I may never want to settle down, who knows?
The sex I have engaged in recently is physically gratifying and just Fantastic. That actually helps me in the dating world. Yes, I date women outside of the hobby and have fun doing so. I am not so anxious to get these ladies into bed because I am sexually satisfied already, I prefer to get to know them and just have a good time with them and if I fall in love so be it, but I am not looking for it. Just me, I do wonder sometimes what the lady will think once I reveal that I am a hobbyist. And that would happen because I believe if any relaitonship is to take hold - integrity and honesty must be at the forefront. If you are wondering I have not taken any dating to the level of sex yet as I just think it would not be right as I am still a hobbyist. Once she knew the whole truth and then still wanted me then thats a different story, just me though.
I have grown to really like some people in this hobby and have made some real friends. People that do things for me just because they care and I do for them just for the sake of giving. We are all human and in anything human emotions become involved, that simple. Sex that is both physically and emotionally gratifying is an elusive thing for me to find. I am yet to experience that one, but I do enjoy having sex with a regular lady that has also become my friend outside the hobby. I had one regular lady that I stop seeing as a client purely because I would rather be her friend and she just was not happy with her job, I liked her too much to be a part of something that did not please her, so I stopped seeing her as a client, just me.
I do not know if I answered your questions but that is where my mind went when I read your thread.
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09-08-2010, 04:36 PM
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#5
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Premium Access
Join Date: Dec 30, 2009
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 7,014
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For me, the short answer is no. I actually think it's gotten better for me. As I visit with my favorites over and over again, the experiences gets better and better every time. Each time I see one of my "regulars," the sex seems better, the conversation is better, the intimacy is better and our friendships get better. It's like having mini-relationships with a few close women but with the advantage of being with other great ladies when you want to see someone different and/or new.
Sure, it may have been a little more exciting at first - the nervousness of having never done this before, the surprise of who's behind the door (if you haven't already seen face photos or more) and the thrill of being with someone new - but it's still exciting for me to see someone new for the first time. And seeing one of my favorites it's just as exciting because I know I'm going to have a great time with a wonderful woman.
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09-08-2010, 08:01 PM
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#6
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Premium Access
Join Date: Jan 1, 2010
Location: NOLA
Posts: 218
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Quote:
Originally Posted by London Rayne
Moderation is key.
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That is the important issue, like everything it can get less then interesting if it starts to consume too much time, i.e. researching, setting things up etc. It is just good to take step away here and there. Stop for 4 or 5 months and come back, if one still feels the same it may be time to move on from hobbying completely, otherwise your engines are recharged.
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