AA, Under 30 (28), and a Newbie. Am I the Least Desired Hobbyist?

[Guest082824]

Originally Posted by JDNorthface

Unless it means "No Bad Attitudes." That will kill your chances with most ladies quickly.

True...true

[JDNorthface]

To the OP:

A_S, I'm going to assume you were serious in your question about being the 'least desirable of hobbyists' and that you truly want not just advice but encouragement as well. Let me try to provide that for you since you seem like a decent guy.

First, you've received some solid advice here. Go back and look at it again. Notice that some of it is coming from experienced posters. Pay attention to those post counts and the posting history of the one giving the advice. You'll find that you come to trust what some posters say and others you must take with a grain of salt.

Second, let me add just a bit of my own rhetoric for you. The 'rules' established by these ladies are put in place for the very men who need rules. In other words, rules are usually written for rule-breakers. These ladies have a difficult chore. Each day they open their doors to completely unknown gentlemen and unknown risks. Their rules are established to mitigate those risks to the level that they can comfortably spend time with the gentleman. It must be a difficult job.

Your job is to help them establish that comfort level and the sooner the better. Learn how to set the tone of gentleness and decency from the initial communication. And carry that through the follow up of the session (the thank you note, the review, etc.). Learn how to be a gentleman (the world has too few of them). Understand that these ladies for the most part are just like you--they have friends, families, and feelings. Regardless of what you might be led to believe on some of these forums, they don't like being called names, they don't like being chastised, and they don't like being criticized publicly. Further, they don't like being stood up or lied to. A one hour session at 2:00pm is 60 minutes beginning at 2:00pm and a $200 donation is at least $200. Simply, they are human beings worthy of respect. Learn to treat them as such and you'll find that many of the 'rules' might not apply to you.

But it's a symbiotic relationship to be sure. You deserve the same respect and civility. Don't allow messages to be un-returned and don't allow missed appointments. If that happens, scratch the lady off your list, give up the thought of revenge, and move on. Find ladies who are capable of returning the level of respect you've learned to give them. You deserve it.

Your desirability as a hobbyist, as you undoubtedly have discerned from the above posts, does not rise from your age or your race. It rises from your ability to give and demand respect in a decent, humble manner. Whether some are willing to admit it or not, the Golden Rule is still a pretty credible standard of operations.

Hang in there. Hang in here. Participate. Let everyone learn your personality. It goes a long way. You'll do great.

And let us know how we can help.

All the best.

[Spikebaby]

Well Said JD!!!

[Super Head 713]

You should never judge a book by its cover. I have seen hobbyists in Houston 20 yrs old and they were very nice and accomodating

[BBW Katrina]

There are plenty of providers that will see you. Just be honest up front and most importantly be respectful. If you know how to conduct yourself she probably wouldn't even know you were under 30.

[roaringfork]

Alien:

As a super-nice white guy with a 35K income and a Mensa-level I.Q., I occupy a position in the world of real-world sexuality which is exactly analogous to yours. Any civilian girl I talk to will eventually scream, "Eww, you can read!" then slam the door in my face (so to speak). I await the great day when every lady in the hobby will recognize that her primary role is to provide a certain experience for those to whom it would be otherwise inaccessible. In the meantime, I recently saw a young AA coming out the door of Cleopatra Spa--and he had a bum leg, to boot.

Keep the faith.

[Jewish Lawyer]

Roaringfork: Nice guys finish last, as I'm sure you've heard. Ever heard anyone praise their lawyer for being nice? No, they want him to kick someone's ass. Girls want men who aren't afraid to stir up the action, no matter how book smart they are.
P.S. How the hell do you hobby on 35K per year?

[Candence]

I wanted to reach out to you... and let you know that I am very "user friendly" to newbies, making this process a bit less stressful, and always respectful and prompt in my responses to any inquiries.


I hope that you are able to find... and conquer everything you set out to "make yours" when you decided you would dabble in the "hobby" and I would say, you will definitely find providers that would enjoy your company, as much as you enjoy theirs! I recently had a review done by an AA, that also was so kind to provide me with my new Professional pics that I will be posting to my showcase today!

I would love to meet you... and show you the southern hospitality that I always extend no matter what your age or race. If you follow the link provided this is an ad I posted this morning on bp. We're not all bad on that resource either, it would just be best to stick with the women that are also established members here and/or on p411. http://posting.dallas.backpage.com/online/classifieds/VerifyAd.html/17809197/7d6e2daa

[threepeckeredbillygoat]

Originally Posted by Jewish Lawyer

How the hell do you hobby on 35K per year?

That was my was my first thought. And then the whole mensa-level I.Q. and 35k together. I know babbeling idiots that clear 100k. Mensa is almost genius, is it not?

[roaringfork]

Originally Posted by threepeckeredbillygoat

I know babbeling idiots that clear 100k.

Yes, so do I: in fact, I've worked for a bunch of them.

Jewish Lawyer: I agree that niceness counts against a guy, and that the smartness thing is at best a wash in the erotic arena. That was exactly my point--that these qualities can be liabilities in certain spheres of activity, just as Alien-Saint says his blackness is.

How do I hobby on 35K? Very infrequently. Many can match the size of the gun; few could compete with the size of the discharge. My holy grail in the hobby right now would be a smokin' spinner appreciative enough not to spit my months of careful savings out onto the floor.

[Guest122922]

Hi Alien,
3 words

*research
*communicate
*establish

enough research on a lady can prevent problems
commication with the lady is very important (don't be afraid to ask questions)
establish the comfort zone before you meet (you will be able to tell by the messages)

If you are not comfortable, then begin another search. STAY STRONG and don't let the girls intice you into a meeting.

As much as we veterans preach this.....we just can't say it enough to the newbies and those who might feel challenged.
RESEARCH....RESEARCH.....RESEA RCH. And then....if you feel someone might work out for you...then go for it, but also be patient.

I've had many black men as clients, all respectable and great lovers. Awesome friends even to this day. One of my clients is from Zimbabwe. Wow...what an invigorating and interesting person to know.
Skin color does not bother me in any sense. It is your approach that gets my attention, your mannerisms and how you present yourself. These things makes for a great session.



JDNORTHFACE
“Understand that these ladies for the most part are just like you--they have friends, families, and feelings”.
“Your job is to help them establish that comfort level and the sooner the better. Learn how to set the tone of gentleness and decency from the initial communication”

Everything you said in your post was right on the money…no pun?

threepeckerbillygoat
uuuh, yeah. I can’t believe I’m quoting someone with that handle (uugh).
“even though most serial killers are white”
”almost 50% all of murders….committed by blacks who are only 13% of the population” ”blame racism…choices people make….just an informed decision”.
Whaaa? I GET YOUR POINT, but I don’t provide service in the ghetto, I would think that is where your statistics come from.

STR8.2.BBBJ
HELL YEAH. Very cool attitude.

TIFFANY JAMES
“Most reputable ladies don't care about color, and may not see any guy under 30, but if you're respectful, someone will give you a chance”

Tiffany - well said. I have my own policy of age limitations and under 30 might be pushing it. BUT you are correct. Some consideration is given to the "mature" factor.

Anyone that mentioned stay away from BACKPAGE. You got that right!
ALTHO – Many backpagers have infiltrated ECCIE. So, you need to develop your skill of weeding those out. It takes time to start to really get a clue, but you DO learn.
Your research and time will be worth every cent.

Good luck to you. No doubt....you will get on board seeing how you’ve made this effort ;-)

Hugs,
TT

[threepeckeredbillygoat]

Torre, you would think wrong. Those are not as you say "in the ghetto" statistics. If I remember correctly that was nation wide. And just out of curosity, what do you have against providing services in (as you say, not me) the ghetto. What's wrong with that??? Care to elaborate??

[Alan418]

Get a p411 account. Stay away from backpages. Remember you're in Texas for crying out loud.

[Guest122922]

Ok, TBP
Nationwide statistics do not drill it down enough for me. The number is diluted. It is not real life in different environments. Nuf said about that.
Why would I NOT offer my services in the ghetto? Ha! Common Sense. Nuf said again.
I’m baffled at why I take the time and energy to respond to a guy with your signature line.
We talk of respect, and you get NONE from me.

ALIEN – I really like your approach to this thread. Take care and may you live long and prosper with many blasts!!!

TT

[threepeckeredbillygoat]

Originally Posted by Torre Tames

Ok, TBP
Nationwide statistics do not drill it down enough for me. The number is diluted. It is not real life in different environments. Nuf said about that.
Why would I NOT offer my services in the ghetto? Ha! Common Sense. Nuf said again.
I’m baffled at why I take the time and energy to respond to a guy with your signature line.
We talk of respect, and you get NONE from me.

ALIEN – I really like your approach to this thread. Take care and may you live long and prosper with many blasts!!!

TT

You won't offer your services in the "ghetto" for common sense??? I don't think I would come out and say it either. Sounds to me like you are implying that an area with a high black population is more dangerous. C'mon man, (in my best ESPN voice)! I love seeing somebody say something that they know is true without actually saying it so they can pretend that thay don't realy feel that way, hahaha.

And p.s. I don't want or need your respect. Respect from someone so fake is meaningless. You said the stats weren't any good because you thought they were "ghetto" stats. Nope, national stats. Now there no good because there not drilled down enough for ya and diluted. The only thing diluted is your honesty. Look it up state by state, city by city, or any way you want. Your type will always refuse to say it, but your unwillingness to go to the "ghetto" says it for ya. Say what ya mean and mean what ya say, or you will always be a fake.

Tpbg