Dating a provider, female advice needed

[bbkid]

What's her phone number?

[boardman]

I have a kitty condo I'm looking to sell. Do you thinck she might be interested.

[Chislaine]

Originally Posted by whitechocolate

Let her do what she most desires to do and you either adapt or move on. Dont ask her to make changes that she may or may not be able to or want to make.

Especially if you really care for her. After all you met her while you were hobbying.

[JDNorthface]

Let me just add for the OP,

1. Read the post below several times.
2. Take two shots of your favorite vodka.
3. Read the post again.

Because drunk or sober, this is good advice.

JDN

Originally Posted by mojojo213

Anything is possible however...
she's feeding you bullshit to keep the money rolling in and you like an idiot thinking your the only one. People don't change because you want them to they only change when they want to, so it shouldn't be something she'd have to say it should be something she should just do.

[Texanfan]

I have a close friend , James , his wife is beautiful and she sells pharmaceutical supplies. He knows that she often sleeps with clients to get sales and he is ok with it , doesn't like it and don't want to know when it happens but her 250,000 income , his boat , 4 wheelers , Harley and his escalade and all his other toys that her money provides he some how accepts it . After all she was doing this when they met and he knew she was aggressive

[jman2010]

Ok more detail. I wasn’t hobbying when we met and haven’t for some time. She volunteered the info and I was ok with it. She says its a past thing and wants a real relationship. Then I find out she is doing clients to get sales. So I say that’s fine but I’m gone. She flips out and says no more doing clients and wants to move forward with us. So my big question is to the providers have you experienced this feeling and tried to move on... Im wondering if she has a addiction to the thrill

[txswing99]

jman...

I've dated several providers -- both active and retired -- and, frankly, really enjoyed the relationships. I happen to like a woman who enjoys having sex several times a day and --while not all have been providers -- its a target-rich demographic for that type of woman. ;-)

A key part of the relationship is honesty. Per what you've mentioned, it seems like you're having it in spades...and sounds like you are dealing with it well. IMHO, the best way to gauge is she's being honest in a relationship is NOT whether she lied to you in the past, but rather if once you've both established a "let's be honest with each other" rule in the relationship, she repeatedly violates it. In your case, if you've both agreed that she no longer is to sleep with her clients and ex-clients while your together...she should live up to that...and if not, she needs to be up-front and honest about that.

Looking into the sexual history of any single woman before she met you requires you to rather prepared -- esp. for an older women. A woman may have had sex with her friends, clients, bosses, teachers, the paper boy and the dad of the kid she babysat for, etc. as a single woman and, frankly, that's all rather healthy. Chances are that your sexual history is just as varied and colorful. It's how a she treats you and your relationship that matters.

You should know up-front that an ex-provider is definitely likely to be addicted to the thrill and attention she received as a provider -- however fleeting it might be. Its the same issue you find with woman who were models, actresses, etc. So they'll require more of your attention as a result.

hope that helps...

-T

[lizardking]

You can date a "provider"?

Imagine that!

[Mojojo]

The fact that you question it and have doubts should be suffice to let you know it ain't gonna work, moreover if its hard to accept that she's doing clients for sales then that just adds more weight to the fact that it's not working for you.

Additionally if your paying off a bill for her (car note, child support, mortgage, etc) or you hold rights to some of her property then there is no doubt this girl is keeping you on the hook with the repetitious "I'm going to quit" crap.

[Jemma Martin]

Yes ex-providers can be faithful. If I was a guy I'd never date a provider who was still providing just like I wouldn't date a guy while still doing this. If a girl wants to make this her life then that's her choice, but not every girl is in it for the long run. If she won't stop providing to other guys while y'all are together then you need to break up with her and find someone else. You just need to be smart and think to yourself about if y'all were in a real relationship would she consider doing it again or being faithful. It's that simple. Don't be someone's second choice. Either end it or tell her y'all can't be serious until she ends it altogether. Good luck!

[markeymark]

Originally Posted by Jemma Martin

Yes ex-providers can be faithful. If I was a guy I'd never date a provider who was still providing just like I wouldn't date a guy while still doing this. If a girl wants to make this her life then that's her choice, but not every girl is in it for the long run. If she won't stop providing to other guys while y'all are together then you need to break up with her and find someone else. You just need to be smart and think to yourself about if y'all were in a real relationship would she consider doing it again or being faithful. It's that simple. Don't be someone's second choice. Either end it or tell her y'all can't be serious until she ends it altogether. Good luck!

very well put! I do think providing is a tough addiction to kick. Its difficult to work a week at 9 to 5 job to make one day's provider pay. The sexual thrill of being with new people is part of the addiction too.

[htoh]

How do you know that she's quit? Every time she's out showing a client a property or something wouldn't you be suspicious? If she's made a successful sale, wouldn't you again be suspicious? I know I would!

[Guest071514-1]

As utr said you can if you both except it and love it. Evidently you have jealousy issues of which don't belong with this type of relationship. I often think I couldn't be with a (normal) guy and let him know this is what I do or what I did in the past. It takes a very specialsituation for that kind of relationship to work. I'm my opinion I would be more into my guy cause we have the sexual understanding and he could give me a little more of what I love so much, on the other hand how could i love someone who would allow that. Who would know and be ok with it. I think you have issues definately or you wouldn't had started this topic. It probably won't work my dear

[Guest071514-1]

To answer your question yes a provider is capable of true love. Not talking about a crack whore but a good woman as some of us are. Good luck

[bjtillicum]

Originally Posted by enderwiggin

Awesome. I'm in the market for a house actually. Can you send me your girlfriends contact info.... And pics.

Dammit, I'm late. +1

In other new, with the prices these days, I've been looking to buy a new house.