Defining terms used in ads.

[lawyerinjeans]

I just read in another forum, a discussion of what is meant by GFE and PSE. It is though this topic is some philosophical issue that has been discussed through the ages without resolution. I brought the issue to this coed forum for the purposes of inviting discussion from both side of the subject. Here's my opinion and suggestions for whatever its worth. I would think that we have the ability to define these terms ourselves, or at least through the efforts of our friends at ECCIE and/or other sites offering similar services. Why not state in the provider profile rules, that use of the term "GFE" means at a minmum, certain things, i.e. DFK and BBBJ? There is always going to be the YMMV issue, but I don't see where it would cause any more problems than what are already out there. The whole idea of ECCIE and similar sites is to provide accurate information to the users of the sites so they can make informed decisions. I think it would definitely cut down on the number of disappointments because the provider has a different definition of GFE and can say with impunity, "Well, that's MY definition of GFE". Similarly, I dont' see any problems and can see a lot of upside with asking clients (or at least providing the opportunity) to give certain info about themselves for the benefit of the providers, e.g., marrital status, age, height/weight, circumcised, length, etc. (Admittedly, not all sites have client profiles, but it would seem the preference for sites that DO have client profiles would give them an edge over those that do not). Incorrect info on a profile (client or provider) could subject the listing party from participating on the site. Just an idea. What's yours?

[guest010313]

I think it is a great idea. I have an abiding love for specificity. However, getting the entire hobby to agree on a single thing, much less deciding once and for all what the alphabet soup MUST mean, is a harder and more thankless task than herding cats.

[SinsOfTheFlesh]

GFE is about attitude, its not an alphabet soup of acronyms.

[Allie_Kat]

There have already been sooo many threads on defining GFE here and believe me, no one ever agrees.
Best of luck.

[lawyerinjeans]

I absolutely agree with your statement, but just reading the ads would allow just about every provider to lay claim to offering a GFE because most providers claim to have the right "attitude" if that's the measure for use of the term. I think there is a difference though in a provider using the term in her ad, and a client enthusiatically using the term in his review. As things stand now, the provider's use of the term doesn't tell the potential client much. If, on the other hand, a reviewer says, "A true GFE", then I think that encompasses much more than any acronym and actually speaks more to the provider's attitude. I wholeheartedly agree with you that the provider's attitude is more important than any acronym.

[Muffrider]

Here's an idea: Why not call the provider and talk to her? A 5-10 minute conversation will tell you a lot more about whether you might have some chemistry than trying to divine what was in someone else's mind when they used a vague acronym.

Here's another idea: If you sense some chemistry after talking to her, maybe you could actually meet her.

Plus, I've heard there are these things called "Reviews" where you can read the actual accounts of other hobbyists and get a sense of her personality from their experience.

[Fsn57]

Originally Posted by Muffrider

... I've heard there are these things called "Reviews" where you can read the actual accounts of other hobbyists and get a sense of her personality from their experience.

+1, I ignore the terms "GFE" and "PSE" since they can mean so many different things, they're useless terms. Reading the reviews and the menu of services in the reviews provides a much better indication of what to expect.

[KCQuestor]

Originally Posted by lawyerinjeans

I absolutely agree with your statement, but just reading the ads would allow just about every provider to lay claim to offering a GFE because most providers claim to have the right "attitude" if that's the measure for use of the term.

Ads are marketing. We all have learned to be skeptical about ads that we see on television or read on billboards. "Lo-fat!" "35% more effective!" "Extra Strength!" How do we cope with these ads? We 1) read consumer reports and reviews, 2) look carefully at the product information on the box, and 3) try it and see if it works as promised.

Why can't we just be as skeptical about ads from ladies? If a provider's ad says "True GFE!" we should 1) read her reviews, 2) talk with her about expectations, and 3) give her a chance.

Linking GFE and PSE to specific acts and requiring that they be present is contrary to how many of us define the terms. It reminds me of one of the other review sites, which has a policy that if a woman doesn't offer BBBJ she can't get higher than an 8/10 in her reviews.

[lawyerinjeans]

I brought the post from another forum simply to invite discussion from a wider audience. It may well be a "How many angels can dance on the head of a pin" type question, but I think it's a legitimate topic for discussion whether it's ever resolved or not. Muffrider seems to take exception with even presenting the question. Evidently he has it totally figured out. I don't think, however, that asking a provider whether BBBJ and/or DFK is included in her GFE is going to lead to a "5-10 minute conversation". It will likely lead to a 5 second conversation. You've advanced the discussion not a whit by offering what is already known. I appreciate Allie Kat and Stacy's comments - thanks for taking the time to respond. I found Stacy's comment particularly insightful and made me think more about the issue than I had when I originally posted it. Acronyms may get me in the door, but attitude brings me back.

[malwoody]

Originally Posted by Muffrider

Here's an idea: Why not call the provider and talk to her? A 5-10 minute conversation will tell you a lot more about whether you might have some chemistry than trying to divine what was in someone else's mind when they used a vague acronym.

Here's another idea: If you sense some chemistry after talking to her, maybe you could actually meet her.

Plus, I've heard there are these things called "Reviews" where you can read the actual accounts of other hobbyists and get a sense of her personality from their experience.

You actually talk to providers on the phone?.. All kidding aside, a phone conversation is good but sometimes there are providers who are nervous or just can't express themselves on the phone. I've been fooled more than once.

[KCboy]

The terms all mean different things to the interpreter.
Discussion is good but as Allie said its been done over and over without any definitive answer! Reviews are a pretty good indication of what to expect but certainly the individual personal relationships mean even more! Ymmv certainly applies to every situation so what is good or clear for me may be bad and clouded for you. I think in most cases if you do your homework on who you contact or see you will stand a good chance to succeed. Treat them with respect have fun and more than likely you will be treated the same way! We're all human despite the business aspect sometime you can really have a blast on both ends.

[KCQuestor]

Originally Posted by lawyerinjeans

I don't think, however, that asking a provider whether BBBJ and/or DFK is included in her GFE is going to lead to a "5-10 minute conversation". It will likely lead to a 5 second conversation.

In my experience, it will lead to a zero-second conversation as she hangs up on you. (Unless that's what you meant).

[Guest121212]

Originally Posted by KCQuestor

In my experience, it will lead to a zero-second conversation as she hangs up on you. (Unless that's what you meant).

I agree. Most careful ladies will immediately cease any discourse when you mention a specific sexual activity (or begin using overtly sexual terms in any capacity). If they do not, you need to really examine if she may be the type of lady that is right for you . . . especially if you are concerned at all with discretion.

I tend to agree in many ways that this entire thread is a waste of bandwidth and borders on a troll (admittedly it appears unintentional and the OP seems sincere - but this discussion evokes the same replies time and time again that someone trolling may desire to get). This issue has been discussed many times over, and very recently - it is in many ways a "beating a dead horse" topic . . . They can't be accurately quantified (the acronyms) no matter how long it is discussed or debated, and discussion of the topic generally leads to nothing but continued debate and occasionally it breaks down so much that it will eventually incur points for people that can't keep things in check when they become emotionally charged.

BOTTOM LINE: THERE WAS A TIME when these terms actually meant something. They have been so diluted by overuse, misuse and flat out deception by the progression of the business (and its participants) online that it seems almost silly to me that they are continued to be used (I personally have tried to find alternate ways to convey meanings without their use). Not only that, as soon as there would be (which there won't, but for the sake of argument let's play) any consensus of what an advertised acronym was and that it assured a certain level or type of service, THAT VERY DAY (think: THAT VERY MINUTE), some lady will intentionally misuse the acronym if she feels it gains her ANY competitive edge in her advertising.

There are many ways to have a conversation with the right lady to know whether or not you'll get what you'd like . . . it takes time and practice and a bit of tenure in the endeavor, and the clues will be easy to pick up in conversation and in reading a lady's Website, etc. Additionally, some do find reviews helpful, however, most very heavily reviewed ladies (not all - but many) are very YMMV, IMHO.

Good luck!

Kisses,

- Jackie

[big country]

What I fail to see is AFTER you go through and pass thier screening process When is it the time to discuss
limits without throwing up red flags??

[guest010313]

For me, once you passed my screening I will discuss anything. I'm already planning to show up, if I was wrong about you I'm fucked anyway. Why not talk about stuff?