The dark side of Ambien Sex

[sparks4you]

I just finished editing the following entry on my blog. I thought it might be timely due to the popularity of this subject. I think everyone considering this should have the other side too. Here is what I wrote:

I saw a post on ECCIE that I ignored at first because the title was "Ambien Sex". I thought that it was a joke, what would a sleep med have to do with sex. My curiosity finally won out and I checked it out.

I read the posts and followed the link and read the first page and last page of posts on the subject. I was amazed and intrigued, could this be the way to enjoy sex with Prudence on those times she is too worn out from the day's or week's challenges. What about date nights when we go out, enjoy our special time together, then come home, get ready for bed, and she crashes or zones out reading a book or watching TV. I cannot remember how long it has been since we came home after a date night and ended up having sex.

My mind was racing with the possibilities. Fantasies were going to come true!

She trusts me with the over the counter meds that I recommend, because I am the one that plays the family's in home "Doc". If someone in the house is hurting or not feeling well, I take care of it. I do the research, I read the labels, I know what each med is supposed to do and what can be taken in combo with another.

This was going to work. She wakes up in the middle of the night and has trouble going back to sleep as many do at our age. I would start with the lowest dose, give it to her to try as a new sleep aid and let her fall asleep on my shoulder as she does quite often.

The next step would be to wait and see if she wakes on her own. If she does not awaken on her own after a period of time I could start getting whatever was in reach aroused as she slept. Maybe that would get her going.

Since this is the initial test I don't want to be too aggressive, too little patience could show my hand and ruin everything. The dose needs to be right so that she is relaxed and uninhibited enough to be the wild woman that I crave and does not have a recollection of what has transpired. If she was aware of what had transpired during the night, she might remember the "new sleep aid" and how it made her act like a "slut".

Wow! I know just where to get my hands on some of the generic version online! But maybe I should do more research first, I don't want to let the little head get me in trouble that I will regret. The little head has my heart racing with the possibilities, but the big head still wins.

I decided that I needed to do more research first, I always do. I Googled "Ambien Sex" and what I found brought me back to reality. Stories of nightmares which included hallucinations, sleep walking that resulted in bruises all over the body from trashing the room or even the entire house, sleep walking that included leaving the home to look for sex, anal tearing and bleeding.

Sleep driving, sometimes with children along for the ride. Binge eating. Consuming alcohol, which intensifies the effect. Belligerence with family members and others. Divorce due to the woman finding out what has transpired due to eventual recollection of part or all that has happened.

The stories are too numerous to list. Are they all true? I would say that some may be false or embellished by the teller, but many have to have some truth to them.

This will only happen in my life as a fantasy where all things are possible. Some fantasies are better left as such. There may be some that want to try this with a willing partner. It might work out fine for you, but my life partner would not knowingly try it so it will not happen with us.

I am sorry if some think this is too deep for this forum. I just think that as a community we should all want to be as informed as possible. Over the years I have heard the words play safe countless times, this should also include what we do with chemicals too.

Below are the links to the forums I visited, I know there are more, but I had seen enough.

From cpi3000's post on ECCIE:

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/ambi...KLCD3574NCB9JS

More that I also visited:

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/ambi...NP97L01F1AALR8

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/ambi...TV1GRAU445AAD0

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/ambi...7PCHSQ05AO4BND

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/ambi...E2FSAURH3M2U93

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/ambi...ALGSPM3EDEGPFD

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/ambi...S5AEILDIK0FCPT

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/ambi...IDS4250KEE7J6H

http://www.healthboards.com/boards/s...ien+sex&page=2

http://www.healthboards.com/boards/s...+message+board

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2008/05/29/2142/

http://psychcentral.com/blog/index.p...sleeping+pills

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archive...sleep-driving/

[Carrie Hillcrest]

"The dose needs to be right so that she is relaxed and uninhibited enough to be the wild woman that I crave and does not have a recollection of what has transpired."

Um, ew. Plying someone with any drug -- legal, illegal, prescription, or over the counter -- so that they aren't entirely conscious in order to have sex with them is wrong. It's also called rape. I'm glad you didn't go through with it, but I'm sincerely disturbed that you considered it or that you would suggest that it might work out "fine" for someone else.

...EW.

[TexRich]

wow, no wonder Tiger wanted her to take Ambien!

I dont know about the "rape" part if the woman or man knows their spouse/SO is going to have sex with them, only if they didnt know.

[Guest060812]

I have to agree with Carrie. Just seems wrong on so many levels.

[TexRich]

Originally Posted by omaha2dallas

I have to agree with Carrie. Just seems wrong on so many levels.

wrong maybe, rape? legally I dont think its rape IF the other spouse/SO knows or allows the other to have sex with them while on Ambien. Some people obviously roll that way. Go figure...

I agree, I don't think its right, I wouldn't do it, but its not rape. Where is ShysterJon to give his legal expertise when you need him, LOL. Of course, I am going mostly from the links that have threads of personal experiences that sparks4you provided. I was reading how some posters were saying how it saved or helped their marriages.

[5150]

I went www.criminal.findlaw.com here is the definition of Rape

The crime of rape (or "first-degree sexual assault" in some states) generally refers to non-consensual sexual intercourse that is committed by physical force, threat of injury, or other duress. A lack of consent can include the victim's inability to say "no" to intercourse, due to the effects of drugs or alcohol. Rape can occur when the offender and victim have a pre-existing relationship (sometimes called "date rape"), or even when the offender is the victim's spouse.

If one were to give there SO/spouse Ambien a lack of consent could be implied especially if the individual giving that person Ambien lied or coerced there SO/spouse into “voluntarily taking it” especially if the SO/spouse was not aware of how it could affect them and the SO/spouse lost the ability to say “no” As always problem is proving it in court. I will say this any SO/spouse ever gave my daughters ambien,G, or some other drug I would be going Huntsville.

Bottom line NO means NO. If someone says no, stop, quit and you do not stop it can be considered rape. To bad if she/he got you all hot and ready to go she/he says no you better put your pants back on and go home and take a cold shower.

As already stated this is wrong on so many levels that it makes my skin crawl.

[sparks4you]

Originally Posted by Carrie Hillcrest

"The dose needs to be right so that she is relaxed and uninhibited enough to be the wild woman that I crave and does not have a recollection of what has transpired."

Um, ew. Plying someone with any drug -- legal, illegal, prescription, or over the counter -- so that they aren't entirely conscious in order to have sex with them is wrong. It's also called rape. I'm glad you didn't go through with it, but I'm sincerely disturbed that you considered it or that you would suggest that it might work out "fine" for someone else.

...EW.

Just to clarify a couple points.

What I wrote was influenced by some of the different stories I read on the forums at the links I visited. They were the type of stories that troubled me the most. Not everyone is going to visit the links provided and read as much as I did. The story I wrote was intended to make the point that it is wrong. I just want anyone considering this to think about what they are really doing. Everyone that has responded has helped me make my point. Thank you for backing it up.

My comment towards the end that it may be fine for some, was only if both partners were aware of the effect that the drug had and they both consented. If that were not the case it would indeed be troubling and should be defined as rape.

One last point then I will leave it go. I wrote the story in the first person trying to make it come off as personal to the reader as possible. I wanted to make a strong point. I did not consider the type of response Carrie voiced towards me. But in the end I feel that I did get my point across and if it stops one man from deeply hurting one woman I am OK with that.

[Carrie Hillcrest]

Phew. Thank you for the clarification!

[sparks4you]

Originally Posted by Carrie Hillcrest

Phew. Thank you for the clarification!

Not a problem, I was happy to clarify. Without your comment I may not have realized what others may have been thinking. I am sure you were not the only one. Thanks