Getting references

[Versace]

So is it just me or do other providers have problems when trying to screen someone and you get no feedback from the other providers? I thought "sharing was caring?"

I know that anytime I am used as a reference I always try to help my fellow providers with any helpful information I can provide....

[berkleigh]

I agree.

It has become difficult.

I've been around for a while and have built a good relationship with a lot of Providers thru out Texas.

I try to make it a priority to answer those reference requests asap.
There are times where LIFE happens and I have in the past been guilty of not.

However, I become extremely pissed off when I am called/texted at midnight by ANY Provider looking for a reference in the middle of the night.
Most of the time, the girl is NEW and has a very incomplete reference.
I think its rude and not everyone is on the same page/schedule at that time.
And I often will cuss you out because IDGAF...

I feel there needs to be a Hooker 101 ETIQUETTE CLASS ON GIVING AND RECIEVING REFERENCES!

There are several here and on BP who I just plain refuse to take references from.
Not risking my safety.

I needed a reference a few days ago, so I PM'ed the Provider as well as emailing her.

She was a Provider out of Killeen, Tx.

I viewed her showcase and contact info as well as her posts so I could make my judgement on if I was going to take this reference.

Needless to say, she has yet to return either email.
She has logged in based on her activity as well as read the PM.
(I send reciepts w/all messages)

Therefore, that potential client was declined until he can provide a p411 ID with good referenes.
Even though he provided enough detailed Infomation and I did a thorough search/Google for him, it wasn't enough for me to feel comfortable.


That is plenty right there to explain WHY I don't accept references from everyone.



Not that I am being a bitch, but you kind of have to be selective who you do business with.

I am sure most will agree.

[fawn]

I totally agree Berkleigh... I am very select who I will take references from also... Ladies you can either email, text or call me for references.... And I respond quickly....

[HoneyRose]

I always respond to reference requests, but I've been shocked at a few instances where the provider "requires" certain things of me. They don't seem to realize that they are the ones asking a favor.

Examples:

"Please send me a link to your website and your reviews so I know you are a legitimate provider." (Yes, SHE wrote that to ME when asking ME for a reference!! Is it really my job to prove my legitimacy to her? No, it's her job to do the legwork in figuring that out.)

"Thank you for the reference, but you didn't fill in the blanks on the required fields of my form." (She had some stupid form with a dozen things she wanted to know. This was on top of my already giving the client an ok on P411. )

Phone calls. The only way the lady could have my phone number is because an indiscreet hobbyist gave it to her. It's unpublished. How does she know it's me??

Text reference request. ummm....no thanks. Again, she had my number because some hobbyist thought I wouldn't mind since he was in a hurry. How does she know it's me? I politely responded that I only provide references through email. She texted back that she only does references via text. so, our methods were incompatible LOL! I guess it was a game of chicken on who would cave first. HINT: I had no reason to change my methods.

It blows my mind. A strange man is trying to set up an appointment with a lady and gives her some strange, unpublished phone number. Tells her it's his reference and that she should text it. It could be him on his other phone. It could be his law enforcement partner. who knows?

[Surge]

Originally Posted by versace

So is it just me or do other providers have problems when trying to screen someone and you get no feedback from the other providers? I thought "sharing was caring?"

I know that anytime I am used as a reference I always try to help my fellow providers with any helpful information I can provide....

From a guy, let me just say...if you give a reference of a provider you have seen, then give her a heads-up and let her know that someone will be contacting her. I have always felt that it was the hobbyist responsibility to give a reference of a gal that can be contacted. So if you want to see someone then you wont have to wait.

I get to talking to several providers and many have voiced this exact same problem that some of you are having. Some even telling on how some will just refuse to respond unless that hobbyist saw them again. WTF?

Originally Posted by berkleigh

I feel there needs to be a Hooker 101 ETIQUETTE CLASS ON GIVING AND RECIEVING REFERENCES!

LMFAO Berk...between you and Fawn...that would be a bithcin' class...we could do a webcam, and have a link for future references along with a Q&A. Shit, I will volunteer to give the Hobbyist version of it...ROTFLMAO!

Originally Posted by fawn

I totally agree Berkleigh... I am very select who I will take references from also... Ladies you can either email, text or call me for references.... And I respond quickly....

Fawn, I think you have so much to teach these young ones that we ought to invest some time and write down all your immense wisdom and then we can write a book...call it the "YING and the YANG" with both sides of the story...providers/hobbyists! LOL

[guest032413]

What i have a hard time with is when some providers call they simply ask "have you seen sean before he says he saw you?" Sean who I can't say every sean I have see so how should I answer that if I really don't remember...and it makes me wonder when I call a refrence is she being honest when she gives the ok maybe she dosnt remember and could just say yes for the hell of it. I don't think I want to be so big on refrences if he has a p411 and can pm me througgh his handle and has review I'm fine by that.

[pmdelites]

Originally Posted by Surge

From a guy, let me just say...if you give a reference of a provider you have seen, then give her a heads-up and let her know that someone will be contacting her. I have always felt that it was the hobbyist responsibility to give a reference of a gal that can be contacted. So if you want to see someone then you wont have to wait.

I get to talking to several providers and many have voiced this exact same problem that some of you are having. Some even telling on how some will just refuse to respond unless that hobbyist saw them again. WTF?

Originally Posted by berkleigh

I feel there needs to be a Hooker 101 ETIQUETTE CLASS ON GIVING AND RECIEVING REFERENCES!

LMFAO Berk...between you and Fawn...that would be a bithcin' class...we could do a webcam, and have a link for future references along with a Q&A. Shit, I will volunteer to give the Hobbyist version of it...ROTFLMAO!

Originally Posted by fawn

I totally agree Berkleigh... I am very select who I will take references from also... Ladies you can either email, text or call me for references.... And I respond quickly....

Fawn, I think you have so much to teach these young ones that we ought to invest some time and write down all your immense wisdom and then we can write a book...call it the "YING and the YANG" with both sides of the story...providers/hobbyists! LOL

surge,

first of all, it's "Yin and Yang". aren't Ying and Yang a rap group?

i have offered my services PRO BONEO, err, pro bono to fawn and Lita Italiana Princess if they should ever decide to hold Proviing 101 classes as well as applied graduate classes. either as powerpoint slide turner, flipchart flipper, refreshements server [in the outfit of their choosing], and demonstration dummy, err, model.

sadly, none have availed themselves of my services.


seriously, if women entering this sub-culture took some time to ask and learn from the combined experience and wisdom of some of the other providers w/ years under their garter belt, there just might be a little bit less b.s., ncns, miscommunication ... and more delites.

but, as in many other areas of the world, they will only learn if they want.


remember what dorothy parker said, "You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."
http://womenshistory.about.com/od/qu...thy_parker.htm

[LuckJack]

This thread should be expanded to a class on screening. When I give a reference I also give the manner the provider likes to be contacted. Email, PM, text, etc. I figure if that is the way she schedules it would be the way she would want to give references. I have no problem giving references even though I have numerous OKs on P411, I want the provider to to comfortable especially sense I seldom see providers I have not met or at least flirted with over an extended period. I agree with Fawn, which is the norm for me, that she is select about references. I think you need to know the provider before you give credence to the reference. I do think it is strange that some providers are so bad about responding, I would think that makes any reference from them a little suspect. HR has sound advice as usual. Screen ladies, please, please be safe.

I do agree with PM, maybe Fawn and HR could co author the book or at a minimum teach a class. It would be a great benefit to both providers and clients.

[MikeHonchoHimself]

I know its been brought up before, but I would love to see eccie implement some sort of reference "tag" linked to our handle. (For PA members maybe?) I think it would be a valuable tool that would benefit both the men and the ladies here.

[Brandee69]

I agree!!!!!!!

[Waldo P. Emerson-Jones]

I don't get why providers don't give better discounts to p411 members with OKs since the screening is so much easier. I know some do, but most p411 rates are the exact same as advertised on eccie and elsewhere. It just makes sense to me that if screening is such a hassle, then steer your customer base toward those who are easy to screen.

[Guest070413]

Originally Posted by Dmac279

I know its been brought up before, but I would love to see eccie implement some sort of reference "tag" linked to our handle. (For PA members maybe?) I think it would be a valuable tool that would benefit both the men and the ladies here.

Some of us still appreciate discretion too much to be publicly linked as a reference. Sign up for P411.

[nbs4143]

When I call/PM a providerI've always told them if you wish to verify me please use any of the providers that I have reviewed and when they pick a provider and ask her always say "He reviewed you" so that should be the best way to refresh the memory of a provider, also if the review list is long please do not pick a provider review from last year, I think the recent ones and if the guy reviewed the same provider a few times... that is much better chance to get a firm YES for a ref...IMHO

Originally Posted by Kandy Kelly

What i have a hard time with is when some providers call they simply ask "have you seen sean before he says he saw you?" Sean who I can't say every sean I have see so how should I answer that if I really don't remember...and it makes me wonder when I call a refrence is she being honest when she gives the ok maybe she dosnt remember and could just say yes for the hell of it. I don't think I want to be so big on refrences if he has a p411 and can pm me througgh his handle and has review I'm fine by that.

[Guest070413]

Originally Posted by nbs4143

When I call/PM a providerI've always told them if you wish to verify me please use any of the providers that I have reviewed and when they pick a provider and ask her always say "He reviewed you" so that should be the best way to refresh the memory of a provider, also if the review list is long please do not pick a provider review from last year, I think the recent ones and if the guy reviewed the same provider a few times... that is much better chance to get a firm YES for a ref...IMHO

This is not a bad idea, but the problem that was brought up was not really about a guy having references so much as those references not responding to the reference request when it is made. Honey Rose and Berkleigh have mentioned some issues that really do happen all too often. That is why options such as P411 are so helpful. It is a bit like an express lane to meeting for many ladies because other methods can take so much longer sometimes and often for reasons we don't have control of.

*Side note - I would like to say a huge Thank You to the ladies that do reply and are as prompt as possible. You are greatly appreciated and your name will always be mentioned when a friend asks for recommendations!*

[nbs4143]

Elysa,
My point was that if you wish to screen someone check his who he have seen and maybe he have seen a provider that you are friends with and that should be one more quick way to verfy him.
Also even if they don't answer the request and you didn't talk or ask no one about this guy, then its your decision to refuse him or like I've told many providers "Please check my posts here and the review list of the providers that I have seen and reviewed and if that is not good you than I say thank and there are many other providers that will see me", I didn't have any problems after that....