Newbies Guide to Not Getting Scammed

[eccieuser13]

In light of all the scams and unfortunate blunders
of meeting people who are not who they claim to be,
I thought I'd take the time to make a short
guide so you have a better chance of having a
great meeting with a real provider.

Every provider is different, but this is a general guide
that will hopefully ensure you success in not being taken
by scams.

1. Check for reviews on Eccie or Erotic Review, etc.

(As I've discussed before, some sites, like Erotic Monkey,
are not reliable review sites and the reviews can be
completely fake.)

The caveat about reviews: How long ago was the latest review?

If the last review of the provider was 6 months ago,
for instance, you are really taking a gamble. Who knows what the provider looks
like currently? The longer it's been since their last review, the
more uncertainty lies in their service or appearance depicted
in their photos.

2. Become a member of P411 and see women exclusively from P411.

P411 is a great site for this industry because they verify the photos and ID
of the providers listed on their site. They also give "Okays" when a provider
sees a client on P411, creating a network that makes hobbying more of a
success and safer for both providers and hobbyists.

3. In addition to either #1 or 2, make a phone call to the
provider.

You can tell a lot just by talking on the phone to a provider (not talking about text messages).
Generally, if someone wants to take time to talk to you, a brief convo,
they will be better to see in person. It also is great to know the provider does some
screening regarding who they see.

**There are providers who probably don't require a phone call before
an appointment; however, in my opinion, it's a great way to break the
ice and get to know who you're making an appointment with.

4. If asked to make a deposit or pre-pay for the appointment...

Does the provider have reviews or is the provider on a site that verifies the provider, such as P411?
If not, it's not safe to proceed. You can bet your hand on the roulette table!

Anyone can place an ad. But not just anyone can send in photo ID and actual photos of their face
and hold up today's newspaper with their ID and have their profile approved by a real human...
there are real stipulations required by legit sites such as P411 and Tryst.link

[hogfan4201]

I wish I would have had these tips starting out, much easier than learning the hard way. Thanks for your willingness to educate the newbies and remind those with more experience as well

[tuckahoe]

I never have talked to an escort on the phone prior to an appt. Most used to not accept phone calls. I find it difficult to talk on the phone to someone I don't already know well. I don't know what to say, and feel awkward, and make a bad impression. It is much easier
for me to talk in private, face to face.

[eccieuser13]

Originally Posted by tuckahoe

I never have talked to an escort on the phone prior to an appt. Most used to not accept phone calls. I find it difficult to talk on the phone to someone I don't already know well. I don't know what to say, and feel awkward, and make a bad impression. It is much easier
for me to talk in private, face to face.

So I'll tell you why, from your perspective, a client, you SHOULD make a phone call, particularly before a first appointment:

~ Me personally, I can't get excited about meeting you if I don't talk to you first, hear your voice. A voice is very human; a text, not so much.

~ When I see you've made a phone call, not a text, I see you've made more of an effort. And, yes, I'm giving credit here,
because making a phone call is more of an effort than a text. I appreciate that very much!

Maybe I live in a fantasy world, but I want to imagine that you are so excited to see me that you would go to any lengths to see me

A phone call just isn't an ocean, is it? But it's an effort beyond a text.

~ When you are on a phone call, you are searching for social cues as you listen to a person talk and their voice:

What are they feeling?
How do they sound: tired, happy, excited...?
Do they have a certain accent? A lot of people love Southern accents, for example. (I have a very Southern accent!)
Are there people in the background? Well, for a first meet, this can be very valuable insight.


When you say, "I don't know what to say..." I do sympathize. The simplest of things are very helpful and informative:

How is your day going?
What do you like to do in your free time?
Where are you from?
How long have you lived in...?

And then there are the compliments! For example, "I love your photos on Eccie. I especially loved this one..."

You have to break the ice sometime!
And in my opinion, the sooner you do it, the easier it is.

Compared to going into a meeting without a phone call, you always have MORE information and more EXCITEMENT overall.

And I really need to add....

Biologically, women need more than men to feel "excited."

If you want a lady to be excited and ready to see you, (physically and
emotionally,) it takes more than a text! We need to hear your voice (your masculinity... (because every man has a unique and masculine voice).

If a lady tells you they don't want to talk to you on the phone, it's very unnatural. (Yes, it takes less of their time.) And if you have
any desire to see someone who really has any interest in you, you can bet they are not really interested, in this scenario.

How can we, as humans, be interested in meeting fact to face if we will not take a moment to make a phone call, find out the sound of each other's voices?

**I write this as I listen to Madonna: Crazy for You

[FLWriter]

Originally Posted by eccieuser13

So I'll tell you why, from your perspective, a client, you SHOULD make a phone call, particularly before a first appointment:...

...

I, like Tuck, don't normally make that introductory phone call. I'm not averse to it but usually it's not something necessary. But after reading E...user13's remarks, I wouldn't have a problem doing so. She's gone to great length to delineate her position; so, if I chose to visit her I would want to respect her thoughts.

Now, if she wanted me to do it for subsequent visits, I would wander off elsewhere. Life is too short...

All the best.

[theotherguy1]

I see that you mention Eccie and P411. What about TER (The Erotic Review), does anyone use it any more?

[tuckahoe]

Originally Posted by eccieuser13

So I'll tell you why, from your perspective, a client, you SHOULD make a phone call, particularly before a first appointment:

~ Me personally, I can't get excited about meeting you if I don't talk to you first, hear your voice. A voice is very human; a text, not so much.

~ When I see you've made a phone call, not a text, I see you've made more of an effort. And, yes, I'm giving credit here,
because making a phone call is more of an effort than a text. I appreciate that very much!

Maybe I live in a fantasy world, but I want to imagine that you are so excited to see me that you would go to any lengths to see me

A phone call just isn't an ocean, is it? But it's an effort beyond a text.

~ When you are on a phone call, you are searching for social cues as you listen to a person talk and their voice:

What are they feeling?
How do they sound: tired, happy, excited...?
Do they have a certain accent? A lot of people love Southern accents, for example. (I have a very Southern accent!)
Are there people in the background? Well, for a first meet, this can be very valuable insight.


When you say, "I don't know what to say..." I do sympathize. The simplest of things are very helpful and informative:

How is your day going?
What do you like to do in your free time?
Where are you from?
How long have you lived in...?

And then there are the compliments! For example, "I love your photos on Eccie. I especially loved this one..."

You have to break the ice sometime!
And in my opinion, the sooner you do it, the easier it is.

Compared to going into a meeting without a phone call, you always have MORE information and more EXCITEMENT overall.

And I really need to add....

Biologically, women need more than men to feel "excited."

If you want a lady to be excited and ready to see you, (physically and
emotionally,) it takes more than a text! We need to hear your voice (your masculinity... (because every man has a unique and masculine voice).

If a lady tells you they don't want to talk to you on the phone, it's very unnatural. (Yes, it takes less of their time.) And if you have
any desire to see someone who really has any interest in you, you can bet they are not really interested, in this scenario.

How can we, as humans, be interested in meeting fact to face if we will not take a moment to make a phone call, find out the sound of each other's voices?

**I write this as I listen to Madonna: Crazy for You

Well, well, I sure got myself in a fine fix this time! I can't say I'm sorry I did either! Looks like I am going to have to make a phone call at some point. You are quite a unique lady! I can't argue with your logic at all! Thank you for such a thoughtful and insightful response!

[austin88998833]

Sage advice Kindall Nicole. Thank you for that! IMO you’ve just made yourself 3X more desirable, as if you weren’t desirable enough already! You get out of it what you put into it

[eccieuser13]

Originally Posted by austin88998833

Sage advice Kindall Nicole. Thank you for that! IMO you’ve just made yourself 3X more desirable, as if you weren’t desirable enough already! You get out of it what you put into it

I actually wasn't fishing for compliments, I promise.
I think it's difficult to understand people's brains, and so
it's helpful to say what we're thinking and why we do things a
certain way.

[Ornumerianoc]

I 100% learned more in the 5 or so minutes it took to read this post, than I have from months of askin a buddy of mine who used to hobby quite a bit that I’ve been trying to get to share wisdom… Eccieuser13 thank you so much for your perspective! Much appreciated from a newbie trying to learn before lookin like a complete idiot 🤷🏻

[Grace Preston]

For obvious reasons.. I'd strongly disagree with "If the last review of the provider was 6 months or more ago" part.....


I step in and out of the hobby frequently, sometimes for months and in the most recent instance, years at a time. In addition-- many ladies have a large core of regular clients that don't feel the necessity to write a review each time they meet.



I think reputation matters in this particular case. Someone like me isn't likely to do anything to trash a long held reputation. It IS also important to note whether or not the provider is using the same pics from 2-5-10 years ago or do they update their photos regularly.