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Coed Discussions Hobby-related discussions belong here. Let's keep these discussions on-topic, thought-provoking, and more importantly...entertaining!

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Old 01-04-2022, 07:43 PM   #1
kchobbyist22
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Default Reference building

Weird question, any providers up for meeting just for the sake of a reference? No activities, just confirm I am real, safe, not LE, and provide reference. We can work out some kind of compensation before hand since your time isn’t free of course.

Reason is I try to stay anonymous and also with traveling girls. I am also picky so I don’t really want to try and meet up and then have a failure to launch, which is kind of a waste of time and effort for both of us.

Hoping to keep the community safe and secure while preserving resources.
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Old 01-04-2022, 10:11 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by kchobbyist22 View Post
Weird question, any providers up for meeting just for the sake of a reference? No activities, just confirm I am real, safe, not LE, and provide reference. We can work out some kind of compensation before hand since your time isn’t free of course.

Reason is I try to stay anonymous and also with traveling girls. I am also picky so I don’t really want to try and meet up and then have a failure to launch, which is kind of a waste of time and effort for both of us.

Hoping to keep the community safe and secure while preserving resources.
Hmmm, so how exactly would just meeting with you and "no activities" prove that your "safe, and not LE"?
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Old 01-04-2022, 10:17 PM   #3
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Agree^^^
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Old 01-04-2022, 10:50 PM   #4
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Here's the best way...You go on a date and hookup after like they do on Tinder. After the hookup, she says, "I'm in college by the way and I don't want to be too much in debt, would you donate to my college fund?" You happen to have $300 and give her it. Problem solved.
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Old 01-05-2022, 12:16 AM   #5
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Hmmm, so how exactly would just meeting with you and "no activities" prove that your "safe, and not LE"?
That would have to be something me and the provider work out. The smart ones can probably tell anyway, but getting comfortable seems to be something that is a pre-check before anything else happens.
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Old 01-05-2022, 06:59 AM   #6
Unique_Carpenter
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kch,
Providers, most, take reference checks quite seriously. And, a reference check from another city, or older than a few months, is usually worthless. And btw, it's common for traveling hobby folks to require more than one reference.
So simply get actual dates and have fun, even if you have to do newbie screening the 1st couple times.
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Old 01-05-2022, 08:41 AM   #7
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Old 01-05-2022, 01:42 PM   #8
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That would have to be something me and the provider work out. The smart ones can probably tell anyway, but getting comfortable seems to be something that is a pre-check before anything else happens.
I'm not trying to be an ass, and yes to some degree meeting first can calm some nerves, but you comment was that meeting would confirm that your "safe and not LE" which it would in NO way do either. Thats as silly as ladies posting ads saying "won't see anyone in LE"? Okay, well I guess that solves it? Is she going to ask for your ID? No not that one, the badge in your coat? As others have posted you have to start with someone who will be willing to give you reference once you've past whatever screening they require. I'd also agree that P411 was an excellent option, and once your vetted you should have little trouble setting up dates. Others disagree on the cost involved but personally its a great investment and I've had no trouble ever setting up a date with anyone (if we could work out the particulars) pretty much anywhere locally or on the road traveling. Just IMHO...
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Old 01-05-2022, 05:59 PM   #9
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Old 01-07-2022, 05:17 AM   #10
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I agree w/UC & Falcon. You need to just have legit dates then you're covered. I might also add what you're proposing is against the rules for a reason. Would you trust the word of a reference who has done nothing more then dinner and says no they are not LE? How would they know if they didn't put themselves in a position to find out?
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Old 01-07-2022, 01:29 PM   #11
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So simply get actual dates and have fun, even if you have to do newbie screening the 1st couple times.
The problem is when you are not interested in any of the providers who are newbie friendly and who provide references. So you have to pay provider rates to someone you don't care to see, just so that you can get the references to see someone who you want to.

I love the OPs idea, as it is basically a local version of P411. It's kind of what we did with the M&Gs a while back. A bunch of girls and guys would show up at a bar or restaurant and meet each other in a group. Guys would vouch for each other to the girls, and vice versa.
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Old 01-07-2022, 03:43 PM   #12
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KCQ has a point about M&Gs.
Quite fun to meet the person behind the board persona
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Old 01-07-2022, 06:14 PM   #13
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Anybody chat with Lakecat or Sens55 lately?
Wonder how they are doin?
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Old 01-15-2022, 09:56 AM   #14
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Honey that's not how that works unfortunately. A provider can't give you a reference for BCD activities nor could she say you were safe when you meet in a public place. Most people aren't going to be out of line or dangerous in a public setting. I think that sometimes it needs to be a reminder to some that while yes you gents do put yourself at risk, we as providers face life and death everytime we answer the door. Making screening and references vital to our safety.
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Old 01-16-2022, 11:18 AM   #15
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Anybody chat with Lakecat or Sens55 lately?
Wonder how they are doin?
Sens55 says to tell everyone that he's doing well!
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