Public Service Announcement
I've seen several posts discussing what should a hoogar do if one of us johns have a heart attack, a stroke, or some other debilitating accident while enjoying their company. Some have suggested that all of them be certified in life saving methods such as Heimlich, CPR, Open Ball Massages, etc. But NEVER do we discuss what to do with a Hooker who may be experiencing the same symptoms. Well I want to do my part to add to the community so here are some ideas of what to do with Hoogar if she goes down during the act.
Toyz Top Ten Things to do with a Fading Hoogar
10). Put a party favor in her mouth and push on her chest...everytime she blows out it'll make that funny noise. You're saving her life & having a fun time on top of it.
9). Start telling her about your exe, your lousy boss & all the bad things that have happened in your life...she has no choice but to listen
8). Motorboat while singing "on the good ship lollipop"
7). Try all those positions you were scared to ask about
6). Pour all the shit out of her purse, find the lipstick, and write Haikus all over her body
5). Sit her up in the hotel chair and have a fun game of "patty cake, patty cake"
4). Turn on "Sportscenter" and move her into FF position...you've always wanted to cum listening to Boomer talk about "HE COULD GO ALL THE WAYYYYY"...
3). Put your boxers on her head, put on her dark sunglasses, put a cup in her hand and sit her on the corner of 6th and Lamar with a "HO LESS" sign around her neck...
2). Take her phone, and text the same message to all her Johns. 'YOU LIMP DICKED ASSHOLE, FUCKING YOU WAS ABOUT AS PLEASURABLE AS A GARLIC ENEMA...and by the way, the test came back positive".
1). If she starts turning blue, turn her over for doggie so you don't have to watch...
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