Protocol For Reporting Non-Alert Worthy "No" Recommendations Based On TCB And Not BCD

[SecretE]

What is the protocol for reporting a "no" recommendation for a provider, based on poor TCB when no BCD took place? IIRC, they don't qualify as reviews (and rather not have "the rest of the story" obscured, anyways), yet don't rise to the level of an alert (stuff like time wasting, NCNS, etc.)? I couldn't find a clear answer on what to do.

Thanks.

[Spacemtn]

You can start a thread in Coed regarding these types of issues. Please remember that the posts must be respectful and without disrespectful and inflammatory remarks per the following:
#3 - Disrespect to others, IN GENERAL, will be considered an item of low tolerance, especially when posting in our coed forums. Follow the Golden Rule and treat others as you wish to be treated yourself. This applies to fellow members as well as staff. We do not require that you have respect for us, but we do require that you treat us respectfully in the public forums. If you feel the need to vent, gripe, or blow off some steam regarding a staff member's action or decision, we ask that you keep it private. Email, RTM, or the PM system would be the appropriate avenue to take in such cases. In cases where you would like to request additional clarity about a staff decision, you are free to pursue an answer in either a public forum or private means of communication. If handled publicly, post your inquiry in a respectful manner.
#4 - Blatant insults or hostility toward another member will be met with staff intervention. This applies to using our coed forums for name calling, personal attacks, or vulgar slang terms to describe fellow members. If you have legitimate concerns about another member here, share them tactfully in the appropriate private forums or with staff.
In other words, "The Facts, Sir, Just the Facts"!!!!

Spacemtn
AustinModStaff

[SecretE]

Great, thanks for the clarification.

[ck1942]

SE, you've been around long enough to know the following, so this is much more directed toward new hobbyists than to established gents... although sometimes we established gents are just as impatient as anyone else.

jmho, but poor TCB should be considered as "part of the business" and is to be expected more so from brand-new providers as well as from more established providers on occasion since the Real World may well interfere with the provider's world from time to time. Interfere, heck, collide is probably a better term.

imho, the very best way to communicate with providers is to very closely follow their instructions - e.g., if they say PM me, then PM, if they say text, then text. Email, ETC.

If they indicate (demand!) that you include certain data, such as providers who will vouch for you, then do so.

If they declare they are not newbie friendly, well, be prepared for lack of response.

Always be respectful and always give them plenty of time to reply.

Too many providers recently have been telling me the "hobby has changed" and "god knows where most of the gentlemen have gone" and "wonder where their mamas failed on learning them some basic manners."

Just my dos centavos, of course.

[saustin]

Originally Posted by ck1942

Too many providers recently have been telling me the "hobby has changed" and "god knows where most of the gentlemen have gone" and "wonder where their mamas failed on learning them some basic manners."

Same song; different verse. I have heard that for years. And the door swings both ways.

[GneissGuy]

Amen on the "just the facts." If we stick to that, the truth will usually win out in the end. It works out best if you're reasonably unemotional about it.

It works out best when the guy posts an honest, unemotional account of a lady's poor TCB, and then she reacts and outs herself as a psychobitch.

The best alerts are self posted alerts.

[fun2come]

^^^^^ +1 and then some, lol

Sometimes you don't even need to state the facts yourself, let them explain.

[ck1942]

Add on - and I really hate when I feel compelled to post stuff like this.

I was trying to reach a lady who left the board some weeks ago, and we finally connected today, not quite 24 hours after I made the post above. After hearing her out, I recalled this post and went back and read it to her.... and I made the following addendum:

One of the not so good things about the Hobby is when folks (male/female, doesn't matter) feel the action is all too real and take it to heart in the wrong way.

To make my summary short and sweet:

She left since "a well known and influential hobbyist" had

-- fixated on her,
-- tracked way too much of her personal data
-- appeared at her personal residence
-- flat out jammed her several e-mails, including personal ones
-- jammed her cell phone
-- and threatened to use his influence on the board to ruin her with payback

And texted her while we were talking even though yester her vowed he was through...

... and, well anyone here who cannot see the picture needs a personal consultation with me at the next HH on the 17th.

NOW - before someone says to me "what about HIS side of the story" let me remind you that I never take everything unless with a grain of sale.

However, in this instance I do believe her side almost explicitly since the male in question to my personal knowledge has previously done this type of thing back in the ASPD days.

Needless to say, yes, I will get his side of the story and after that, well....

The target of the unwanted attention is planning to post in the ladies' only area and, I ask that any ladies who see her information to please let me know if they, too, have had bad experiences with the hobbyist since I personally and professionally don't want folks like that to feel welcome at any events I organize.

[DDelight]

Thanks for the info.

Hugs,

DD

[Stefany]

Originally Posted by ck1942

SE, you've been around long enough to know the following, so this is much more directed toward new hobbyists than to established gents... although sometimes we established gents are just as impatient as anyone else.

jmho, but poor TCB should be considered as "part of the business" and is to be expected more so from brand-new providers as well as from more established providers on occasion since the Real World may well interfere with the provider's world from time to time. Interfere, heck, collide is probably a better term.

imho, the very best way to communicate with providers is to very closely follow their instructions - e.g., if they say PM me, then PM, if they say text, then text. Email, ETC.

If they indicate (demand!) that you include certain data, such as providers who will vouch for you, then do so.

If they declare they are not newbie friendly, well, be prepared for lack of response.

Always be respectful and always give them plenty of time to reply.

Too many providers recently have been telling me the "hobby has changed" and "god knows where most of the gentlemen have gone" and "wonder where their mamas failed on learning them some basic manners."

Just my dos centavos, of course.

This this this. What also helps is when you are setting up/trying to set up an appointment, try to be as respectful to us providers as possible. There are plenty of times when not one, not two, but MORE THAN THREE different hobbyists are trying to set an appointment with me at once and not only do I get a plethora of texts, emails AND PM's from guys asking me to "call" them after I've had to ignore their calls for a variety of reasons (and responded almost immediately that I am not somewhere I can talk)--Weekday brunch with my mother/grandmother, CHURCH on Sundays, etc, etc, interviews for internships, at an art show trying to sell my paintings, what have you. Or when I get guys asking to discuss specifics on rate/activities/etc, when I have explicitly stated that I do not discuss. Just plenty of things like this.

Long story short: if you have issues with bad TCB with a provider ^^^ those reasons are likely the cause. Just please be wary that sometimes we do have to deal with a lot of BS. It does just come with the job, but please don't be the reason we're tearing our hear out to get an appointment.

*hugs and kisses*
Stefany