Women - Whores or Angels?

[luv2luv]

I will say up front that I was raised in a pretty strict household where I was taught to treat everyone with respect, especially women. I hold the door for them; I offer my hand/arm to help them up and down stairs; I carry their bags and sacks; I let them precede me through doors. You get the picture.

My treatment of women in the hobby is the same. I was taught to revere women, not to beat, embarrass, humiliate, degrade, or otherwise treat them badly. It appears to me that many do not agree with this philosophy.

I have thought quite a while about whether to address this topic. I can't stop thinking about it since reading a review where a hobbyist described in detail the treatment afforded a provider. Let me point out that she didn't appear to complain; rather, I got the impression that she was "in to it" as well. And there were numerous replies to the review that showered praise on the reviewer for the way he treated this woman. Nevertheless, it bothers me.

Am I the only one who feels it's just wrong to mistreat others? Even if they want to be mistreated? I'm guessing there will be those who want to explain why these things aren't considered mistreatment. I spent a lot of years in the service of this country, at times in combat. I have committed a great deal of violence in my life up to and including taking the lives of others. And I have come to believe that, if there is another way, violence should be avoided. Just my opinion, of course, but humiliating and degrading treatment of women ... of anybody ... is not a good practice.

What is there about this type of sexual activity makes it attractive? Are there limits? How far will you go? Choking to the point of unconsciousness? Golden and brown showers? Causing, in the mind of the one receiving it, severe pain? Or just simply humiliating and degrading another human being? What does it say about someone who gets sexual satisfaction from causing pain in another?

I don't know. THe mods may remove this whole thread because, to me, this is a very controversial subject that could cause some pretty severe responses. But I must confess, I just don't get it!!

[bojulay]

Roll playing can be a lot of fun and a great outlet.

But how far is too far? If both are enjoying it and
no one gets hurt for real it can be an intense enjoyable
time and doesn't necessarily reflect on your normal
relationships with other people.

In rough play a safe word should always be used and one
is never ever to force someone to do something or go
further with it than they want to.

If someone is degrading or hurting someone else by force
or because they have taken their power away from them,
that is always wrong, wrong, wrong.

Trust and a lot of care for the person you are doing it with
are the main components in rough roll playing.

Our society accepts rough in sports, guys beating each other
down in a ring or knocking each other around on a football
field, and when you think about it those are a lot worse than
a little rough play BCD.

All that being said, somebody spank me.

[Guest112916]

The threads are for entertainment. However sometimes when reading I have to sit back and feel disgust at some of the things I read and see that we Hobbiests & Providers do to each other.

Perfect example from ealry 2012 was the notorious thread of Redcajunspinner at The Lido by Barebacklover. There were not enough showers to make me feel clean or enough forks to gouge out my eyes after reading and seeing the pictures of that disgusting event. You didn't know if you needed to feel sad, mad, disgusted or thrilled. There were responses from all sides ranging from "attaboy" to "you need to die in a ditch somewhere."

Violence to a Provider or a Hobbiest is a no no. Endangering health in any way is a no no. Outing another is a no no. People need to have fun and enjoy without treating each other like burning bags of doggie doo on a doorstep.

[MasterBaiter1996]

If both sides are good with it to each their own. Not my cup of tea though.

[Grace Preston]

Just remember luv2luv-- everyone hobbies for different reasons and each lady has their own individual limits.

[Guest112916]

Creepy sock monkey. I bet Ze had a role in that.

[Luke Skywalker]

i am with OP. I dont understand either. i do not condemn it, just dont get it/
my girls (you know who you are) are angels indeed and i try to treat them like the princess they are to me.

moreover, providers are sharing with me something very precious, i feel they deserve to be treated better than common women.

in the hour i spent with them they are the only woman i ever have been with and i love them.

thank you my angels.

[~Ze~]

Originally Posted by Von Spieler

Creepy sock monkey. I bet Ze had a role in that.

Moi?




This year I noticed a few tougher boundaries showing up in my hobby play, as well as a few limits get pushed back a little for more fun.

A lot can be done/said behind those closed doors. I think the respect and communication level once behind those makes the biggest difference in how I will walk out feeling.

A lot of the things we explore in this lifestyle would make normal civvies cringe, but be perfectly normal here.

Things out of the normal vanilla even here, will make others cringe.
Some of it has to do with how situations are portrayed and some, how it is perceived.

[exoticdanceweardealer]

Pandering to ONE gender is not EQUALITY. If you are willing to hold the door for men, carry their bags, and discard chivalry you are closer to EQUALITY.

Sounds like you were brainwashed by feminist society sir. We owe everyone kindness and respect regardless of gender and violence should NEVER occur. Therefore I agree with what you said, I really do, unless it gives preference to a person based on their gender which is just INEQUALITY.

The Western world direly needs to take the Red Pill already.

As far as those acts bordering violence, I would suggest against it because legislation also favors gender inequality and therefore the wrong, hateful provider could scream a false accusation.

Obviously I doubt most providers would do that, but how do you know? It is even more dangerous in the main stream and tell me who would believe your word over hers when she has bruises on her throat?

[bojulay]

A girlfriend I had a while back would get bored as fuck
with just regular stuff, I had to do internet research
and read books just to keep up. She taught me a
few things I had never heard of before.

Girl hitchhiking was one of her favorite games.
She would go out by the side of the road and
I would drive by and pick her up totally pretending
that we had never met before. I would then
have to seduce her into sleeping with me and
she required me to actually do a good job of it
or she wouldn't respond. She was a blast. The
whole cheap porn effect was great.

She would choose what kind of personality
she was going to portray and I had to play
off of that, sometimes shy and demure or
sometimes wild and free spirited and sometimes
a surprise I wasn't expecting like bi curious
lesbian girl.

[LittleMiss]

Angels

[john_deere]

the things i read in reviews that disgust me don't even necessarily have to do with so-called perversions. i think where there's smoke there's the potential for fire, and it seems clear to me from reading some of this shit how the writer truly views women. that's one of the best arguments, in my view, for making ros viewable to the girls (without resorting to off-eccie resources).

[bojulay]

Originally Posted by LittleMiss

Angels

Little miss, I would keep that cutie patootie little round booty
of yours and we could sell your wings and go on vacation. LOL

[Guest053013-01]

OP, I agree with equality, not pandering to women. As I get older I have also learned to be gracious to others holding the door for me.

I once went to an Aids benefit at a dungeon. I was pretty much freaked out by the various methods to be submissive or dominate. But I got to know some folks and they seemed happy and peaceful. Not my thing, but I did design some toys for them!

So, mutually agreed to play can be OK. Like some of you here, I wonder if some of the experiences, or fantasies, we read about are healthy or not.

I will remain polite and respectful to all I can and avoid those I cannot tolerate.

[guest043013-2]

OP, I know the review you speak of, and without PA access, I still could figure out enough to know that the sex was rough and tumble.

I wondered when someone would question it.

I have no problem with consenting adults allowing themselves to be used as they see fit. Go to the other realm, there is a thread on scat play that was posted today. I find it disgusting, but I can ignore it. The guy asked for it, the lady obliged, I figure it was consensual.

In the case of the review by the OP, and the LIDO review mentioned, I question the consensual nature of things. Is it really consensual when a 6'5", 250 pound guy meets a 5'0" 90 pound gal behind closed doors?

Some ladies do not know they can say "NO" and if they have been raised in an environment of pimps and family abuse, may "consent" to the treatment out of a misguided fear or simply thinking that "this is the way it is" and all the ladies allow this type of treatment. How consensual is it, when a lady needs this "donation" to make it through the week, to pay her pimp off, to keep a roof over her head as well as her kids?

There was a thread in the sandbox from a lady asking for help before Christmas to pay an electric bill for her ex and her kid. Lot of suggestions were that the lady should drop her requirements, lower her price, etc. I suspect she got a lot of request from guys to egnage in some unsafe activities for a price. Basically, she was expected to consensually provide services in a manner she was not comfortable doing. Based on her reports back, sounds like she hung in their and things worked out ok. But she was not a little 19 year old but a more seasoned lady with a good head on her shoulders.

luv2luv, you were not alone in your thoughts.

And for the rest of you. I hold the door open for ladies, gents, even that creepy looking guy with his pants down below his butt. I say Yes Sir and Yes Maam to people of all ages. I may go out of my way for that cute little blonde, but at the same time, I will go out of my way for grandma and grandpa as well. (Wish I would have known my own grandparents, they died when I was just a toddler.)