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London Rayne · 02-08-2011, 08:08 PM

I was in the same position when I "started" escorting....my degree did not yield much for the field I had chosen, so it led me to this. Add to that I got tired of being used for free and getting nothing in return.

I would never tell my family or friends not because I fear they would "throw me away," but because I know it would truly hurt them knowing it came to this. That's how they would see escorting...a desperate act. I have a cousin who is 28 and still lives with her darn parents because no way in hell she would ever do this. I have another friend with 3 children who gets no child support and a boyfriend that abuses and cheats on her...still, she would never consider selling herself.

They see how much personal wealth I have for my age...own a home, paying off another, nice vehicle, education, etc. and they want it, but they would never want it this bad. They also see what it does to me inside at times...in my soul that no one assumes we have.

What you choose to do with your life is up to you, and we all have our own demons. Personally, of all the things I have ever done I can tell you honestly this is the one thing I am most ashamed of because it does not line up with my morals and beliefs outside of this.

Unlike you, I could never date a guy who did NOT think this was wrong for me. I want a man who loves me so much that he could not see me with random men for money, or any other reason.....one who would not want to share me. I am not poly but a one man woman I suppose, and there is no room for this life in my relationships. I think after all is said and done I may tell the person I love then, but would never do it now.

Either way, I do wish you the best and they need to let you back in the PR lmao!!

Ed Highlight · 02-08-2011, 09:01 PM

Kara dear, escorting/providing is what you do NOT who you are. Secret/double lives are common and should be kept in context and shared with only a chosen few. If, for some reason, you need to unburden yourself, you already have a very good, trusted friend with whom to do that. Otherwise, there is therapy for you to deal with any of the other issues that may come up. You shouldn't feel like sharing this aspect of your life is required and necessarily the business of anybody else.....we all have our stuff!!

kendra kayy · 02-08-2011, 09:07 PM

Let me 1st say this is a great thread!!! When i first started off in the hobby world I told my bff and he was automatically supportive of me. I also told my daughters grandmother (ex's mother) and she too was nothing but supportive. I only told these two individuals because I knew they wouldnt judge me and they were the closest ppl to me at the time. Now years later I have become alil more open about it with very close friends but still dont prefer to tell most.... including my family. I dont think they would turn there back on me but still I feel like I would be some what of a disappointment to them either that or they would worry their hearts out. Not worth the stress to me. They think I work a 9-5 and noone says anything that would make them think otherwise. I think its important to tell someone you are close too... there is alot that can go on in this world of ours and it helps to have someone to talk to. just my .02 cents!

Guest041811-2 · 02-08-2011, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by London Rayne

Unlike you, I could never date a guy who did NOT think this was wrong for me. I want a man who loves me so much that he could not see me with random men for money, or any other reason.....one who would not want to share me. I am not poly but a one man woman I suppose, and there is no room for this life in my relationships. I think after all is said and done I may tell the person I love then, but would never do it now.

Either way, I do wish you the best and they need to let you back in the PR lmao!!

I don't have a boyfriend. I'm not sure where you read that? In my initial post, I mentioned my gay best friend who is a male? LOL

I also do not want to date anyone while I'm a provider. Thats a whole other thread and can of worms!

London Rayne · 02-08-2011, 10:54 PM

LOL when I read "My BF is a raging homo" I took it to mean your boyfriend.

MsPrittiKitti · 02-09-2011, 02:59 AM

hey gorgeous!
i think, bc *you* have a secret life that you cant share with them
you shouldnt let that be a reason to this dismiss them.
consider this one of the many differences you will have
and let this remain a battle not fought.
its great that you have a BFF in your corner no matter what!!
i bet we ALL wish we had at least 1 person to turn to.
if there were "other" issues that you couldnt go to your lifelong friends about, i think it would be different.
but i hope you wouldnt let "this" be the reason for their dismissal.
in all your yrs of playing..you may have a ton of pleasant memories, but a regret of loosing great friends.
im sure theyre great friends, theyve been around this long, for a reason.
Keep them!! Theyre hard to find!!
best of luck!!
XoXo

The Big Kahuna · 02-09-2011, 03:50 AM

Kara,
After spending some time with you, I am firmly convinced that you will do well in whatever you pursue away from the hobby. You will meet some lucky guy, have a career and maybe a family. Don't tell everybody you know. You have a great friend to confide in and do that. 15 years from now, you don't want to be at a Jr. High football game and have your son's buddies know that you used to be in the hobby. I know some people say screwem if they don't understand. It's just that full disclosure can have far reaching and long term consequences, depending on what situation you find yourself in. I personally have no problem at all with what you do, I am quite pleased you do it. Just do not be too hasty with your decision to "out" yourself. I hope you find peace with your decision...you are a fantastic lady!

jwood · 02-09-2011, 09:10 AM

Kara, I looked at your showcase, and you are only 24, it sounds like these are friends you grew up with. I am in my 50"s and the people I grew up with I am not close to anymore. I have a whole new set of friends. I think being in the hobby makes you less judemental. The older I got the less I wanted to be around someone if there views don't line up with mine. Sometimes you just get tired of the bullshit. There is no more peer presure. Also, I maybe wrong but I think most providers and hobbiest are loners. I have been doing this awhile and I have told only 1 person about it. I think most of the providers I have seen said they don't have many provider friends. I have been seeing one lady for 12 years and she is a loner. Having said that I think that it is important to keep your hobby life and your other life seperate.

Guest053013-01 · 02-09-2011, 09:49 AM

Be one a provider or client, participation in the hobby is almost certainly a secret from someone, probably from most. But who doesn't have secrets? Does anyone actually have completely honest relationships with even several of their friends and family? Almost every relationship we have has limitations. People are different. When we meet a new friend we discover the areas of mutual interest and also those where we disagree. In some cases it means we never discuss politics or sports of whatever. It may mean they go to church and we never discuss it. But even with such limitations, there is still lots to share and enjoy. We can continue to have a fantasy that we can have wonderfully close, open and honest relationships with everyone, or we can accept the limitations and enjoy our friends and family for who they are. Personally I finally had a good relationship with my dad when I realized he could not accept part of me, but he loved me and there was still lots to share.

Kara, be who you are and accept your friends for who they are. Allow them to love you as they see you.

Naomi4u · 02-09-2011, 10:05 AM

Deleted. Don't want this to be permanent. lol

Jackie S · 02-09-2011, 10:14 AM

Please keep in mind, once this Genie is out of the bottle, you can never put it back in.

Whether all of us involved in this 'Hobby' admitt it or not, this is still an activity that is considered taboo by quite a large segment of the population. You have no idea where you will be, or what you will be doing in the future. Do not let a rash decision to "open your heart up" to the world tarnish you for the rest of your life.

You are only 24 years old. I am almost 3 times your age, and from what I have seen in life, I would advise you that the fewer number of "civilians" that know about what you are doing now, the better.