Slutwalk

[NinaBrooke]

SlutWalk first began in Toronto, where on January 24th, 2011, a representative of the Toronto Police gave shocking insight into the Force’s view of sexual assault by stating: “women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized”.

As the city’s major protective service, the Toronto Police have perpetuated the myth and stereotype of ‘the slut’, and in doing so have failed us. With sexual assault already a significantly under-reported crime, survivors have now been given even less of a reason to go to the Police, for fear that they could be blamed. Being assaulted isn’t about what you wear; it’s not even about sex; but using a pejorative term to rationalize inexcusable behaviour creates an environment in which it’s okay to blame the victim


Society teaches "Don't get raped" rather than "Don't rape". It is time to stop blaming the victim!

SlutWalk is about expressing our unity, fighting to shed the stereotypes and myths of sexual assault and supporting a better understanding of why sexual assault happens, putting the blame where it belongs: on those who perpetrate it. We believe in working toward better partnerships and conversations with our protective services and our communities to help make this happen.

The term ‘slut’ has carried a predominantly negative connotation. Aimed at those who are sexually promiscuous, be it for work or pleasure, it has primarily been women who have suffered under the burden of this label. And whether dished out as a serious indictment of one’s character or merely as a flippant insult, the intent behind the word is always to wound, so we’re taking it back. “Slut” is being re-appropriated.

We are tired of being oppressed by slut-shaming; of being judged by our sexuality and feeling unsafe as a result. Being in charge of our sexual lives should not mean that we are opening ourselves to an expectation of violence, regardless if we participate in sex for pleasure or work. No one should equate enjoying sex with attracting sexual assault.

WE ARE COMING TOGETHER. As people from all gender expressions and orientations, all walks of life, levels of employment and education, all races, ages, abilities, and backgrounds, from all points of this city and elsewhere.

We are asking you to join us for SlutWalk, to make a unified statement about sexual assault and victims’ rights and to demand respect for all. Whether a fellow slut or simply an ally, you don’t have to wear your sexual proclivities on your sleeve, we just ask that you come. Any gender-identification, any age. Singles, couples, parents, sisters, brothers, children, friends. Come walk or roll or strut or holler or stomp with us.

Join us in our mission to spread the word that those who experience sexual assault are not the ones at fault, without exception.

We are in the process of organizing the event. Details will follow shortly.

Please also check out http://www.slutwalktoronto.com/

If you want to get involved please contact us: slutwalknyc@gmail.com (This is for Slutwalk NYC on 20th of august)

Here is to see Slutwalks in your city, if not organize your own: http://www.slutwalktoronto.com/satellite

If you’d like to have SlutWalk in your community, we ask that you follow our guidelines:

*SlutWalk is not about hate, and we do not use hateful language.
*SlutWalk aims to reclaim the word “slut” and use it in a positive, empowering and respectful way.
*Refer to sexual assault, not solely rape.
*Do not frame sexual assault as something solely done by men to women.
Women are most often the targets and men are most often the perpetrators, but all genders are affected. SlutWalk recognizes all gender expressions as those that have been and can be negatively impacted. All genders can be sluts or allies.
*Some communities/people are at a higher risk of sexual assault than others based on their status, work, ability, access, race, identity, and a variety of other factors. We aim to recognize this and come together, in all our diversity, as people who are all affected and unite as sluts and allies.
*Use inclusive and respectful language when discussing the diversity of people affected: men/women and all gender expressions, racialized communities, people of different abilities, etc.
*SlutWalk is an impassioned and peaceful stance that aims to engage others in dialogue.

[EJunkie]

Are you leading one?

[whitechocolate]

Nina, any info on how the Toronto walk went? I dont think that LE in this country and probably Toronto as well will get rid of their stupid and biased views on women dressing improperly and causing the assault. I would imagine that in come cities, LE and the DA's office will be out there with cameras. On a side issue, I kind of think the term "slut" is rather colorful and not all that negative. which is interesting. I know some use it in a negative way or they are trying to be negative like the Toronto LE. I hate the term "hooker" which I feel is very negative and not colorful at all. I think a lot of providers call themselves sluts and whores in a hottt sexually exciting way. I have even heard clients refer to themselves as a slut. Nina, what is your take on that as well?

[EJunkie]

Slut was used in the sense of recapturing the word from its negative connotation. LE here officially backed off big time from the original comment, He was disciplined by the “force’.

[whitechocolate]

I wasn't questioning why they are calling the walk "slutwalk". I just wanted Nina's and others take on the non-negative uses of the word slut which does have more varied and colorful meanings. I think LE more commonly like to call prostitutes "hookers" which to me is very negative and not worth recapturing. The use of the term "hooker" is a total put down when used to refer to escorts or providers. The discussion of the term "slut" was only intended as a side discussion a bit off the main topic.

[Guest050715-1]

I think what the police’s stance and what the Chief of Police is absolutely deplorable. I hope your organization raises awareness, eases the suffering of those that are victims of sexual assaults and is part of what helps reduce future assaults.

I think the organization name counters the dreadful comments made and antiquated attitudes that some hold quite well. But taking back the word slut and centering everything around the word is a bit lost on me. I’ve never read anywhere in literature or a women’s history book where it is a positive word. I understand the name is supposed to be provocative, but when my daughter lived at home, neither she nor her fiends were allowed to use the word slut. I think it is a demeaning, negative and aggressive word that is used against women. I say against because I feel that the word in and of itself is hateful and aggressive. Further, I think it is a word that women and girls use on each other, and that is a sad, sad thing. Just food for thought and my take on it.

[Guest053011]

Originally Posted by EJunkie

Are you leading one?

Nope, it happened.

It's called the "Slut" walk to take back the meaning of the word "slut" aka - openly sexual woman - as being a positive and proud thing, rather than an insult. It wasn't a reference to providers, but any woman who dresses and acts in boldly sensual ways. I don't find the word itself insulting, I find the context of it's use can be demeaning and it can be complimentary - hell during great sex it's down right hot.

It isn't the view of the entire police force, it was the view of one idiotic man, who was unfortunately in a position of power, and sadly was put in front of a microphone. If they had any inkling he would say something so profoundly horrible, they wouldn't have put him there. It went well, thousands showed up. There were no arrests, to my knowledge there was no harassment.

All in all I'm sort of glad the moron said it, because it encourage many a woman to stand up for their sexuality, and remind the world that we will do with our bodies exactly as we please, and do not need permission, nor deserve to live in fear. Ten years ago there would have been disgust, but women wouldn't have taken to the streets the way they did. I see that as a positive sign, that women are willing to take action, and not just gripe.

[whitechocolate]

Lauren, I agree with your discussion of the use of the word "slut". I certainly agree it can be used in a rather complimentary way during great sex and even at other times to denote that the woman or man enjoys sex and enjoys lots of it. I think there is that misguided group that feel that if you truly love sex and engage in lots of it, you are defective in some way.

[Iaintliein]

I'm really torn on this one. Certainly anyone should be able to dress as they choose, regardless of gender. And while I by no means want to reduce rape to the level of simple theft, it is still the taking of something of value.

Can dressing in an overly provocative fashion, perhaps in a high crime area (just as an example), be compared to flashing a big roll of cash and wearing flashy jewelry, or leaving the keys in the car in a high crime area? I guess it's subjective to a point as to what constitutes provocative attire, and what constitutes an un-safe environment.

I'm not offering any excuses for an insensitive statement (certainly not trying to make one either). But the same point, made in a different fashion, might be a valid one. I should be able to leave the doors of my home not only unlocked, but open, but I know better.

I think society certainly teaches both, "don't get raped," and "don't rape". The problem is that, contrary to certain political doctrines, societies (villages) don't raise children, parents do, and that is where these lessons need to come from. Unfortunately, too many parents have delegated the responsibility for molding their childrens' behaviors to the schools, the media, the state, and the "society" as a whole.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by whitechocolate

I wasn't questioning why they are calling the walk "slutwalk". I just wanted Nina's and others take on the non-negative uses of the word slut which does have more varied and colorful meanings. I think LE more commonly like to call prostitutes "hookers" which to me is very negative and not worth recapturing. The use of the term "hooker" is a total put down when used to refer to escorts or providers. The discussion of the term "slut" was only intended as a side discussion a bit off the main topic.

You are right. The connotations of the word are re-defined in certain subcultural settings as methods of empowerment. The book "the ethical slut" is one example of that. I think even hooker can be redefined :-). I think the connotations of words are based on cultural settings. Words "per se" are never negative. (Queer theories and etymology). If it is used as negative or insult than it is used within the context of heteronormativity which labels anything other than plain vanilla sex within monogamy (best marriage) as acceptable forms of relating to each other sexually. Aka the term slut derives as "negative" because a "slut" per definitionem is outside of the scale that is defined as appropriate sexual behaviour by mono-heteronormativity. There are sexual acts taht are "good sex" and sexual acts that are "bad sex".

So if you label yourself as slut and are proud of it and see it as positive (or lets say - value free) then it is because it steps aside the valuing from sex acts into "good" vs "bad ones". That is what is called empowerment.

I think even if the guy was telling that, and should not have said it or was put in front of a microphone (as Lauren suggested) he reflects on a common held opinion within heteronormativity. It is nothing "new" to me that men say women should not dress sexy so they don`t get raped. It s nothing "surprisingly-challenging-typical-canadian" which leads to the "oh-mummy-dearest" reaction . It has happened everywhere and still does (even if for political correct reasons no one has the guts to be stupid enough to blurt it into a microphone anymore...) for exactly the reason that we don`t live in a sex-positive enviroment.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slut#Alternate_usages

"Slut is also used as a slang term in the BDSM, polyamorous, and gay and bisexual communities.[9] With BDSM, polyamorous, and non-monogamous people, in usage taken from the book The Ethical Slut, the term has been used as an expression of choice to openly have multiple partners, and revel in that choice:

"a slut is a person of any gender who has the courage to lead life according to the radical proposition that sex is nice and pleasure is good for you."[10]
A slut is a person who has taken control of their sexuality and has sex with whomever they choose, regardless of religious or social pressures or conventions to conform to a straight-laced monogamous lifestyle committed to one partner for life.

The term has been "taken back" to express the rejection of the concept that government, society, or religion may judge or control one's personal liberties, and the right to control one's own sexuality" (source wikipedia)

[NinaBrooke]

dp sorry :-)

[Guest050715-1]

Nina and Lauren, I hear you. I agree with you that being sexually liberated should be embraced collectively by society as a whole, but it isn’t. I have read The Ethical Slut and other books on the subject; and again, I agree with the premise, but the reality just doesn’t offset the negativity of women calling other women sluts. To me it is the same as the N-Word and therefore, in my view, forbidden. It may not be right, but it is the way it is. There are better ways to promote female sexuality, in my opinion, than using culturally and emotionally shocking words. To me it demeans the effort. Just my opinion.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by OliviaHoward

There are better ways to promote female sexuality, in my opinion, than using culturally and emotionally shocking words.

The point is that these words as you point it out are only culturally and emotionally shocking because you participate in the "wrong" culture that obviously contributes to the connotation :-).A word per se means nada. Its the enviroment that makes it having a bad value. In my culture this is nothing emotionally traumatizing or shocking. Maybe it would be better questioning the reality that makes words like that connotatted to "culture shock" and "emotionally shocking". That is what this is all about :-). I remember when i started working as escort i was totally offended by the word "fucking". It was beyond my comprehension that i client told me he wanted to fuck me. Me? I did not want to be reduced to just a fuck? But , i mean , we are participating in the kind of society where we don`t have romantic plain vanilla sex, so he can right away just fuck me, right, and it was me that reduced herself, because i was secretely judging myself by the standards of the enemy? A honorable person does not get fucked, period. How funny, a slut that does not want to get fucked.... :-). But that was me with 18. Kinda delusional, right? Even as escorts we sometimes need to worship the enemy when we were better off just creating our own reality and therefor getting from the dark into the light.

[Guest053011]

Originally Posted by OliviaHoward

Nina and Lauren, I hear you. I agree with you that being sexually liberated should be embraced collectively by society as a whole, but it isn’t. I have read The Ethical Slut and other books on the subject; and again, I agree with the premise, but the reality just doesn’t offset the negativity of women calling other women sluts. To me it is the same as the N-Word and therefore, in my view, forbidden. It may not be right, but it is the way it is. There are better ways to promote female sexuality, in my opinion, than using culturally and emotionally shocking words. To me it demeans the effort. Just my opinion.

I respect that. I simply don't feel slut or whore are words should be culturally shocking in the first place. I have never found them to be such, but I do believe in respecting the sensitivity of others. As such I do mind myself when I use them, taking into consideration the person and context. I find them fun and hot and don't care to ban them from my vocabulary.

[guest010313]

I try not to allow the words of others to effect my sense of worth. It is the feeling behind the words, not the words themselves that are to blame. It doesn't matter to me if you call me a whore or an angel, I care about which one was said with the intention of hurting me.

I love the idea for this walk, it looks like the closest place they may be having one is in St. Louis and I'd totally go over there for that. I haven't been marching in a while!