Doubt, identity crisis, what's real, trust!

[sanan]

Originally Posted by atxdream

After a late night convo with an established provider and long convo today with a new provider, I thought it would be a good idea to bring a thread from a dif board/city to help streamline the reference/first contact process. New providers/hobbyists (and some established) don't always know each providers personal preferences, so hopefully this will serve as a resource.
I've seen this in "secure" ladies areas but not everyone has access to that, especially new providers.
PROVIDERS: Do you provide refs? If so, what's the best method to get a response from you? What info do you need to verify you've seen a gent?
What's your preferred method for a gent to make that initial contact? Is there specific info you want him to include to get a response from you?

Obviously, only post info you are comfortable providing in an open forum.

We already have a process to verify, IF NEEDED. Sometimes hobbyists try and move on. Sometime VIPs verify but don't turn up or are not there as promised.

Sometimes VIPs "KNOW" the hobbyist and don't need to verify, sometimes the VIP is NOT on ECCIE but another site.

Sometimes VIPs are not as organized as IBM and perhaps cannot string it all together like you want.

Solution; how about, we TRUST one another.

[Laz]

Originally Posted by sanan

We already have a process to verify, IF NEEDED. Sometimes hobbyists try and move on. Sometime VIPs verify but don't turn up or are not there as promised.

Sometimes VIPs "KNOW" the hobbyist and don't need to verify, sometimes the VIP is NOT on ECCIE but another site.

Sometimes VIPs are not as organized as IBM and perhaps cannot string it all together like you want.

Solution; how about, we TRUST one another.

You forget that LE is trying to arrest them and can come accross as "trustworthy" by your standards very easily. They would be nuts not to take extra steps to stay out of jail.

[Naughty_Jezabelle]

It's not just jail. There is the chance that you can be raped.... Robbed..... Beat up.... KILLED.

It's a "nice idea" to just trust one another but that's not reality. There are bad people in this world. Unfortunately we aren't living in some fairy tale where things don't go bad.

And if we don't take precautions to protect ourselves as a provider it is not a matter of "IF" something like this happens.... It's a matter of WHEN.

Nice thought but I am continuing to screen.

[Pepper_Springfield]

There is no point arguing with him anymore, unless he is in a providers' shoes, he will never understand.

[Marcus78]

Holy shit! What is it about simple topics (namely what providers charge/provide, and provider screening requirements) getting examined as if they were a PhD dissertation topic? LOL Maybe that's it though! Maybe Sanan is writing a dissertation on the intricacy of providers of ECCIE and their business models.....all presented from the perspective of Dr. Seuss with crappy rhymes and annoying emoticons! LOL

[BoomShakaLaka]

I dont have a problem giving refs if it helps the girl feel more comfortable. There is no way Im gonna see a provider unless I do a little screening of my own, (more like research than screening)


If a woman dosent ask for a little screening from me it worries me some. Or at least tells me she did some research on me being as we have talked some in the past, SOMETHING

To just TRUST in this hobby is totally insane

[skyyeman]

In any and I mean ANY real world scenario that involves imperfect people and complex realities the notion of " hey just trust me" is naive. Ladies do your research and check people out. Protect yourself and I will too!

[tallgeese]

I rarely am able to hobby, as such for me references can be hard to come by. However I would never expect for a provider to simply trust in my explanation that I'm a normal none crazy person. Nor would I do any less research as to who they were in the reviews. Unless I already know the young lady and we have a rapport then I would build trust in that person. Someone once said "we are never more vulnerable than when we trust someone," which is so true. We enjoy this but we all must stay safe and protect ourselves and our interest.

[Merentha]

Originally Posted by Naughty_Jezabelle

It's not just jail. There is the chance that you can be raped.... Robbed..... Beat up.... KILLED.

It's a "nice idea" to just trust one another but that's not reality. There are bad people in this world. Unfortunately we aren't living in some fairy tale where things don't go bad.

And if we don't take precautions to protect ourselves as a provider it is not a matter of "IF" something like this happens.... It's a matter of WHEN.

Nice thought but I am continuing to screen.

Listen to common sense!!! Like it or not the world isn't a nice place and though we do try to have a sense of community, a few bad apples can cause great harm to us all.

[sanan]

Originally Posted by Laz

You forget that LE is trying to arrest them and can come accross as "trustworthy" by your standards very easily. They would be nuts not to take extra steps to stay out of jail.

O I C ... company with a VIP = jail.

How on earth did you come up with that one?

Again you need to read their (VIP) ads MORE CAREFULLY.

Besides LE in San Antonio has far bigger fish to fry than to be trying to entrap a VIP.

[sanan]

Originally Posted by skyyeman

In any and I mean ANY real world scenario that involves imperfect people and complex realities the notion of " hey just trust me" is naive. Ladies do your research and check people out. Protect yourself and I will too!

My point again is this;

A member who has several years on this site and dozens of reviews IS HIGHLY UNLIKELY, to be LE, or to abuse a provider.

A member's history must mean something.

I am not saying that a VIP has to trust newbies right off, I am just saying that putting established members through the same screening is, well just silly and wasteful.

Such a person that does feel the need to uber screen established members has some kind of self doubt / identity problem, perhaps unknown to them.

So yeah this is about trust, and in the end you have to trust somebody.

Also of note; it works both ways. A hobbyist on applying to a new VIP has to trust HER references, and who among us ever bothers to check them? Have you called any of their references?

Where do you look for such information?

You look at reviews.

Which is my point. precisely.

If we have them lets use them, lets ALL use them in a better way and as the original poster declared - but does not herself yet do - streamline vetting for established members.


Now can we all get along nicely and not be doubting our established reviews and members, thank you.

[sanan]

Originally Posted by Pepper_Springfield

There is no point arguing with him anymore, unless he is in a providers' shoes, he will never understand.

Your shoes are far too small for me, but thanks for the offer! I am certain that were you in mine my point would be abundantly clear to you.

So this isn't about arguing, it is about comprehension and composition, i.e we need to better explain our views

[Likinikki]

I am not saying that a VIP has to trust newbies right off, I am just saying that putting established members through the same screening is, well just silly and wasteful. I don't think you're looking at this from a provider's point of view sanan. Established members doesn't verify that they're *safe* to meet. All it means is they *may have* met a few providers. Unless a provider verifies information, with those *reviewed* providers...how do we know the session even took place? There have been MANY incidents of false reviews...and, even reviews written by the provider themselves. And, anyone can buy *premium access.*

Such a person that does feel the need to uber screen established members has some kind of self doubt / identity problem, perhaps unknown to them. While this statement may seem reasonable to you...have you ever been in a provider's shoes to REALLY KNOW? I've been ASSAULTED and ROBBED, so I can assure you...I screen well, so I don't risk getting KILLED the next time...NOT because I'm in self-doubt or have an identify crisis! (lol) This incident happened when I first started...and didn't know anything about *safe screening.*

And, don't be naive about le...low hanging fruit get busted everyday. You may not hear about them...as most providers don't publicize getting busted...they usually just *go on vacation.* And, people who get busted with bigger issues...will and have turned on others...even taking down large escort sites. If you doubt me...look up escorts.com.

And, back in 2009...a Houston holiday social was busted by Houston Vice...over 20 of them raided the party...ski masks and all! There were *verified providers* and, who you would consider, *established hobbyists,* who later were identified as vice. They found a way to infiltrate the system.

Anyone who attended that party will tell you...it was surreal...no one expected that to happen! So, your idea of *we should just trust one another* isn't just naive...but, utterly foolish!

If this idea is how you want to approach the hobby...more power to you! GOOD-LUCK...hope you don't run into a cash-n-dash provider with pimps that like to roll people! Oh...and, that's happened to several of our hobbyists. One had his clothes and ring stolen...ask him if he TRUSTS so easily these days.

The other other 99% percent of us will continue to hobby safely!

[Guest081519]

Originally Posted by Likinikki

If this idea is how you want to approach the hobby...more power to you! GOOD-LUCK...hope you don't run into a cash-n-dash provider with pimps that like to roll people!

The other other 99% percent of us will continue to hobby safely.

Well said Nikki.

Originally Posted by sanan

I really fail to see your point.

[sanan]

Originally Posted by JJ

Well said Nikki.




I really fail to see your point.

Because you are as blind as you are dense?