Older, Successful Men...

[Zabrina Sarafina]

As we all know, it is important to have a clear idea of.. to put it simply, the type of people we want to meet.

Lately I've been noticing a similar phrase pasted on certain ladies profiles, who write they are attracted and looking to meet older, successful men (and insert other similar terms - worldly, refined etc) and whenever I come across this, it amuses me.

I like to dabble in traditional online dating sites every once in a while and it's a phrase I've used myself before in my profile, to which I have received angry mail saying how materialistic I am, etc usually from the low-income/unemployed crowd of men. Alongside I have also gotten enthusiastic letters from the crowd I was seeking, who sounded happy to fit my description.

All in all, it left me with a funny impression of the term successful.

I am kind of wary of using that word now, as I am aware "successful" is subjective; it can have a different meaning to each of us. No you don't have to be of a certain level of income to be successful. I would consider the monks with their minimalistic lives to be highly successful. yada,yada

So I'm curious, when you 'older successful' men come across that phrase in a lady's ad does it make you feel privileged, special, important to fit her ideal, and vice versa do the rest of you ...feel it just sounds kind of superficial?

[Zimmie6942]

Life is superficial, if it wasn't we would all live in caves. Successful in life can mean anything but I like the definition that true success is being able to live your life the way you want regardless of what people think or regardless of how they try and hold you back. I consider myself as much as a success as a failure. I make enough to live where I want, drive what I want, see as many girls as I want, travel when I want and buy what ever I want. But I fail daily with my business and friendships.

As far as providers, I like it when there honest and let you know what they really want. Money or whatever they need because they give me what I need. I believe it comes down to hypocrites or really men who don't believe that what is ok for them is ok for women. I think its funny that they get offended about a post, must be week/unsuccessful or to put it nicely they just have a very different way of looking at the world that I don't understand.

Also I would think that you would have to be really delusional to think that the providers you see are seeing you for anything other than money. Now you might have a better time with them and they might stay longer or provide better service if you treat them right and they like you but in the beginning its all about safety and money. So why would someone posting that your looking to see someone who has money make them mad. Thats just not logical.

I hope the girl I see make a ton of money and see a bunch of guys who treat them nice. A successful women is very sexy.

[Guest022718]

Despite the endless platitudes about success being defined by meaning in our lives; like it or not, in our society success is defined as $$$$$$. And make no mistake about it, this is what the ladies mean when they post they like "older, successful men."

They're not really attracted to guys with grey hair, potbellies, and wrinkles, but they are the demographic most likely to show up, be polite, not beat the shit out of them, and be able to pay for it.

That way they can build up a pile of cash, and go buy a Rolls Royce for their boyfriend/pimp they ARE attracted to, even though he DOES regularly beat the shit out of her.

[Still Looking]

When I read those descriptive words I just laugh. The first thought that pops into my mind is "cheesy".

[Still Looking]

On the other hand if it said she was looking for any low life stiff leg who managers to scrape enough cash together that she would rock your world, I might not be impressed and feel she could be talking about me!

[rcinokc]

Originally Posted by hgritstoo

Despite the endless platitudes about success being defined by meaning in our lives; like it or not, in our society success is defined as $$$$$$. And make no mistake about it, this is what the ladies mean when they post they like "older, successful men."

They're not really attracted to guys with grey hair, potbellies, and wrinkles, but they are the demographic most likely to show up, be polite, not beat the shit out of them, and be able to pay for it.

That way they can build up a pile of cash, and go buy a Rolls Royce for their boyfriend/pimp they ARE attracted to, even though he DOES regularly beat the shit out of her.

What he said. Makes me think the provider is greedy and more likely to upsell or have the dreaded a-la-carte menu.

[Tiffani Jameson]

I seek out quality people in general. And that has nothing to do with age or money.

I have personally found that financial means doesn't make for a better date, or even lends to more class in a person. The only thing I require in a person is that I can learn something from them, whether that be from their successes or failures, and that we mutually value each others' time.

There are men who are financial successes, but they see no value in the people around them. All anyone wants is his money. They don't see the point in taking a working girl out for a meal because they're not getting their money's worth. We would like to think that all the cheap men are broke men, but that's NOT the case. I would warn all not to be so assumptive.

As far as hooker jargon goes, I've seen $100 girls say they're 'courtesans only for upscale/successful gentlemen with discerning tastes/that seek the finer things in life.' The words themselves mean nothing. And women who know what they're here for lead only with THEIR OWN positive attributes.

Quality is quality, no matter how you slice it. Money does not equal quality, generosity, and value.

[thisguy23]

I don't care what they put in their add (unless it involves a special rate) I'm going to go with the opinions and reviews of the gentleman and some of the other guys here.

[offshoredrilling]

Originally Posted by Zimmie6942

Life is superficial, if it wasn't we would all live in caves. Successful in life can mean anything but I like the definition that true success is being able to live your life the way you want regardless of what people think or regardless of how they try and hold you back. I consider myself as much as a success as a failure. I make enough to live where I want, drive what I want, see as many girls as I want, travel when I want and buy what ever I want. But I fail daily with my business and friendships.

As far as providers, I like it when there honest and let you know what they really want. Money or whatever they need because they give me what I need. I believe it comes down to hypocrites or really men who don't believe that what is ok for them is ok for women. I think its funny that they get offended about a post, must be week/unsuccessful or to put it nicely they just have a very different way of looking at the world that I don't understand.

Also I would think that you would have to be really delusional to think that the providers you see are seeing you for anything other than money. Now you might have a better time with them and they might stay longer or provide better service if you treat them right and they like you but in the beginning its all about safety and money. So why would someone posting that your looking to see someone who has money make them mad. Thats just not logical.

I hope the girl I see make a ton of money and see a bunch of guys who treat them nice. A successful women is very sexy.

^

Originally Posted by hgritstoo

Despite the endless platitudes about success being defined by meaning in our lives; like it or not, in our society success is defined as $$$$$$. And make no mistake about it, this is what the ladies mean when they post they like "older, successful men."

They're not really attracted to guys with grey hair, potbellies, and wrinkles, but they are the demographic most likely to show up, be polite, not beat the shit out of them, and be able to pay for it.

That way they can build up a pile of cash, and go buy a Rolls Royce for their boyfriend/pimp they ARE attracted to, even though he DOES regularly beat the shit out of her.

^

[Cpalmson]

Older, successful means several things to me.

1) Girl is wanting a guy who can afford her rates or at least not willing to haggle her down
2) In general, the man knows how to dress and more importantly shows up to the date clean and sober
3) The date is less likely to be physically demanding as in the guy is older and likely not going to want to go through a very vigorous session.

[Keyhole Arc Blow]

Older, successful men to me means she wants someone who is generous and isn't some dumb kid who's gona pull some "cute" stuff just to.

Basically an actual gentleman who's pocketbook looks like this except with currency spilling out

[Guest110516]

In terms of ad content, I look at the pics, the phone number, and the rate. I check the pics to see if they are legit. I check the phone number for bad reviews or alerts. I check the rate for affordability.

Other ad content pretty much gets ignored (except for "TS", "TV", or references to their penis size -- sending me to find someone else).

[Old-T]

Originally Posted by Cpalmson

Older, successful means several things to me.

1) Girl is wanting a guy who can afford her rates or at least not willing to haggle her down
2) In general, the man knows how to dress and more importantly shows up to the date clean and sober
3) The date is less likely to be physically demanding as in the guy is older and likely not going to want to go through a very vigorous session.

I think this is largely it. Talking with ladies the translation seems to be:

"Older" seems to mean "I like a guy who is worldly, can carry on a conversation more complex than 'What's taking you so long to get undressed?', and is likely to be looking for sessions that are more date-like than hit-and-run.

"Successful" is two pieces, the guy can afford the kind multi-hour dinner date kind of evening, and in some ways he is content in his own skin.

I think Zabrina's comment:

"it's a phrase I've used myself before in my profile, to which I have received angry mail saying how materialistic I am, etc usually from the low-income/unemployed crowd of men. Alongside I have also gotten enthusiastic letters from the crowd I was seeking, who sounded happy to fit my description."

Is exactly correct--if that is the kind of guy a lady is marketing herself towards, it seems to resonate with exactly that class of men. Most those ladies don't care if guys who are seeking a 15 min quickie get upset about it.

[ataglance2000]

Originally Posted by Zabrina Sarafina

As we all know, it is important to have a clear idea of.. to put it simply, the type of people we want to meet.

Lately I've been noticing a similar phrase pasted on certain ladies profiles, who write they are attracted and looking to meet older, successful men (and insert other similar terms - worldly, refined etc) and whenever I come across this, it amuses me.

I like to dabble in traditional online dating sites every once in a while and it's a phrase I've used myself before in my profile, to which I have received angry mail saying how materialistic I am, etc usually from the low-income/unemployed crowd of men. Alongside I have also gotten enthusiastic letters from the crowd I was seeking, who sounded happy to fit my description.

All in all, it left me with a funny impression of the term successful.

I am kind of wary of using that word now, as I am aware "successful" is subjective; it can have a different meaning to each of us. No you don't have to be of a certain level of income to be successful. I would consider the monks with their minimalistic lives to be highly successful. yada,yada

So I'm curious, when you 'older successful' men come across that phrase in a lady's ad does it make you feel privileged, special, important to fit her ideal, and vice versa do the rest of you ...feel it just sounds kind of superficial?

Zabrina,

Hmm...a very thought-provoking question...what is my reaction when I see " seeking successful gentlemen"? When I see this phrase...I feel that the lady is seeking men that have the capability to be "successful" in everything that they seek to pursue. Then it follows, successful men create encounters with a lady that are filled with thoughtful interactions before, during and after the date - inclusive of financial, physical, intellectual and spiritual gains. These gentlemen are capable of creating deep, insightful and reciprocal relationships....and perhaps even capture a piece of the lady's heart and vice versa. If the lady is true to her words of what she seeks, then she'll excel in the encounter and the gentlemen will pick up on that. If not, then it becomes a singular encounter and life moves on to the next window.

It's ironic that people focus on a few phrases here and there from a lady's site, when if they read all the text, the context for each phrase can be developed and one begins to see the broader and true offering the lady is seeking. Just my thoughts...

[Vivienne Rey]

It is subjective. I won't presume to speak for anyone else or their motives.

I like them older and successful for various reasons. Age is more likely to bring maturity, balance and stability with it. There is also that settled-in thing about them that I find really appealing. I've never required them to be gorgeous (my men were, by most standards, not much to look at but they were sexy as hell to me). Success, well, I like money.....but it's not about the bling. It's about security and having the means to indulge, if that's what we want to do. My partner should do as well as I do, at the very least, or better. I wouldn't want to be with someone who is going to compromise or reduce my quality of life. Relationships are meant to enhance, IMO. Money helps there.

These are also the ideal clients for me as I like a longer engagement. Younger men just don't fluff my skirt.