Discretion on the board

[JessicaKnightly]

Lately, I've seen a few post where the provider will say something like, "it was so nice having lunch with you yesterday" or "You've seen me..." is this acceptable? I leave it up to the man to let me know if he's okay with it. I know when I guy writes a review, he is announcing he's seen you and often they will ask the girl if it's okay to write one. But, I try to protect my clients whereabouts and doings when mentioning his handle.

Here's a real life example of what I'm saying. There's a man I visit with often in another state. I'm one of his ATFs and he sees me every time I email him that I'm coming to town. He's a sure thing. However, he sees a lot of local girls that charge less than I do and he doesn't want them to know he also sees me. I found this out when he was going on about how much he enjoys me and I ask, "would you be willing to put that in writing and write me a review?" An unlike some men that don't write reviews, this gentleman had dozens. But, he flat out told me that he wanted to keep out time together a secret. This never came up again until the last time we were together I mentioned I was going to attend the Meet & Greet in his area. He had a look on his face that I could tell it bothered him. He said that he was going to attend, but not if I was going to go. I reassured him that I wouldn't even act like I knew him and only say "hi" and introduce myself. He was okay with that and will be coming. I have heard rumors that a certain local girl has run other girls off when it come to him. She has claimed him and makes it know he is hers. I totally understand.

So, should a provider refrain from mentioning a client by handle on the board or am I just being over cautious?

[CarolineDavenport]

I don't think you're overly cautious. It's a good policy to have. However, I never know what kind of relationship and familiarity others have, so I don't judge those who talk about having met. I know I've done it on occasion because I knew the gent wouldn't mind, and most times had already put that info out there. But I'd rather err on the side of discretion than risk divulging too much information.

[offshoredrilling]

I would post that you had lunch with a client, had a great time. With out naming handle. Then let him post or pm back.

Now for the part a provider has claimed him. If I, I would post back rather than pm over play just how great a time it was.

[jwood]

He wants his cake and eat it too. He's got it working his way, but that's the way it should be he's paying. It's going your way too because he's a "sure thing". Why muddy the water.

[Guest062217]

Jessica - I am in no way judging the gentlemen you see and his desire to keep it a secret that he sees you - out of fear of repercussion from the local providers he sees.

However, IMO that is completely silly for those providers to be upset if he sees another lady i.e. an out of town lady like such as yourself. My guess is they will either 1) be upset that he spends X amount of $ on an out of town lady who is probably a much higher rate than they are or 2) be upset that he sees another provider in general. Either way, it is absurd (imo). As a man, I ask the rhetorical question..."How can a hobbyist allow a provider to be placed in a position where he has to secretly see other providers out of fear of some form of retaliation?"

Another rhetorical question - "What does he do when / if he sees a review or other hobbyists discussing the fact they have seen the same provider?" Last I checked this thing we all call "The Hobby" is here to allow all of us the Freedom (key word here) to explore meeting ladies no matter where they reside or tour. Just like the ladies are able to see whomever they chose to or not to and earn a living from doing so.

Both men and women here all have the 'choice' to see, not see or chose to no longer see someone for whatever reason at any time. I am positive there are ladies who look at a hobbyists previous reviews or who he has received 'okays' from on 411 and based on those finding have chosen not to see him (assuming he is requesting an appt) for whatever personal reason that might be.

I have no problem admitting that I have chosen to not see a provider that I had seen in the past based on a review she received from a hobbyist I did not care for. We did not have a "relationship", she was not my SB or even my provider "on retainer". I had no say in the matter and no claim to her what so ever...I was just completely 'put off' by the whole thing and chose to never see her again.
Is it right or wrong? I don't think there is any one answer. Again, just as it's been said before.. ..It's the providers body so it's her choice to see or not see whomever and to charge whatever she wants to. Just like a hobbyist can see or not see certain providers and chose to pay or not pay X amount...

One last point to me standing on this soapbox.... Providers who know me, (I think) have pretty much figured out that I am a free spirit and I am not the type of hobbyist to proclaim I have a "ATF"....I will write a review if I chose to (unless a provider specifically says.."please do not write a review") and if a previous provider will not see me because I have met with a certain lady or paid more $ for another lady than her rate.....Oh well.

Until the day I have an SB or "provider on retainer" my only rules is this......lets all go have fun and enjoy this wonderful thing we all call "The Hobby"

[Monica13]

I have run across providers that deem the hobbyist "theirs" and will go out of the way to cause trouble over it.

I never mention anyone's handle or name. I am here to provide a service to someone. If they see other providers or have wives and families that is none of my business. I try and keep their business as private as I can especially on public forums.

Recently one hobbyist I used to see got close to a certain St Louis provider and she called his wife and wanted to set up a meeting to tell her all the dirt on who he was seeing besides her. Now this is a 300 dollar an hour provider in our area.

IMO this is totally uncalled for. If you have to do that you have no business being a provider. If you get personal with a client and you know he has a wife and family and you feel the need to "inform" the wife of his actions you have NO business being in this profession.

You provide a service and receive compensation for that. That is as far as it should go on a personal level. Hobbyists like a variety for different reasons. If you feel the need to be the "only one" maybe you should have a different job.

Just saying......

[Wakeup]

Because that post about a hobbyist that has dozens of reviews, is going to show up to a meet and greet happening in DC or Boston, will ignore you entirely, yet secretly sees you without telling anyone, and has a local provider who is involved with him in some way...was real discreet...

What was it you were saying, again?

[Old-T]

Originally Posted by Wakeup

Because that post about a hobbyist that has dozens of reviews, is going to show up to a meet and greet, will ignore you entirely, yet secretly sees you without telling anyone, and has a local provider who is involved with him in some way...was real discrete...

What was it you were saying, again?

Yes, it narrows it down to a few dozen cities and hundreds of guys. Assuming of course that a few more details have not been changed in the telling to fog it up even more. And if you accept that M&Gs are not necessarily connected to or mentioned on ECCIE then it is ambiguous by another few orders of magnitude.

So yes, I would guess her post here was discreet enough.

[HeatherDAngelo]

I do find it unsettling when a lady announces that she saw a particular hobbyist. Funny I don't find it uncouth when it is the other way around and the hobbyist gives a shout out to a lady.
When she says "saw you for lunch the other day" That puts said hobbyist in a particular city at a particular time. Spending time with her and not the rest of you. It feels like she is laying claim to him and telling the rest of the ladies "He chose me, not you". I do find it indiscreet.

About the other topic you threw in. I knew right away who you were talking about. Good thing neither one of them uses ECCIE. Trust his judgement about not writing you a review. Having a secret lover is fun and exciting anyway. I see it now. Stolen glances. Heart quickening when you are introduced like you have never met before. Oh wait, I will see it. See you at the M&G.

[Wakeup]

Originally Posted by HeatherDAngelo

About the other topic you threw in. I knew right away who you were talking about. Good thing neither one of them uses ECCIE.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

You were saying something Old-T?

[Guest062217]

Originally Posted by HeatherDAngelo

I do find it unsettling when a lady announces that she saw a particular hobbyist. Funny I don't find it uncouth when it is the other way around and the hobbyist gives a shout out to a lady.
When she says "saw you for lunch the other day" That puts said hobbyist in a particular city at a particular time. Spending time with her and not the rest of you. It feels like she is laying claim to him and telling the rest of the ladies "He chose me, not you". I do find it indiscreet.

About the other topic you threw in. I knew right away who you were talking about. Good thing neither one of them uses ECCIE. Trust his judgement about not writing you a review. Having a secret lover is fun and exciting anyway. I see it now. Stolen glances. Heart quickening when you are introduced like you have never met before. Oh wait, I will see it. See you at the M&G.

It really is exciting....having a secret affair with a provider that you have never reviewed or even had any interaction with openly is very fun. Call it "sexy liaisons"...

[rockerrick]

This sounds exciting I want to go to this M&G.

[pyramider]

I do not know if its discretion butt the ladies I visit hardly say a word. Personally, I thinck they want to repress the memories of my skills with my 1.3" of dangling death. They tend to break out laughing at inappropriate times ...

[Guest062217]

There goes this thread....don't even bother ladies - "Fuckup" and the trolls are circling.....

It's always nice seeing you....see you at the next MG...

[Camille Fox]

To even discuss a session, period, is indiscreet in my opinion...