found out shes a retired hobbyist

[countrycurious]

First let me say I have no experience with the hobby and i am not looking. Im here to read and learn. I found out my fience is a retired escort about a year into our relationship. She moved here from a larger city.

We have a very open minded sexual relationship and i find it erotic to talk to her about it. Sometimes she will. Most times it is a taboo subject.

To my question... anybanybody want to chime in and give me insight on how to aproach the subject?

Thank you for having the board here for us sheltered hicks to learn more and gain insight

[pyramider]

Do not bring the hobby up to her. As curious as you may be, do not bring up her past escorting. If she brings it up listen, and do not judge. As far as you go, do not get involved in the hobby. She probably has trust issues to begin with and you hobbying will only diminish the trust she has in you.

[Ed Highlight]

Originally Posted by pyramider

Do not bring the hobby up to her. As curious as you may be, do not bring up her past escorting. If she brings it up listen, and do not judge. As far as you go, do not get involved in the hobby. She probably has trust issues to begin with and you hobbying will only diminish the trust she has in you.

AND what have you done with 3-sides??? That was a very insightful and compassionate answer to an interesting question!! I'm impressed....

Now give the laptop back to Pyramider!!

[Fancylady]

Retired escorts always come back to the business

[Satyrrical]

Originally Posted by Fancylady

Retired escorts always come back to the business

I wish.

[countrycurious]

If she did it would be for the adventure or the thrill. And We've talked enough about it for me to acknowledge that fact. We both have decent jobs and money would not be the issue.

Honestly im ok with that. I am pretty open minded. Nobody has hurt that kitty in 40+ years. They arent going to hurt it now. Open and honest is my only criteria.

Pyramider.. thank you. Pretty much how i handle it. If she brings it up we talk. If not i leave it alone

[4pargolf]

Uh....

[1blackman1]

How old is she and how old are you

[countrycurious]

Originally Posted by 1blackman1

How old is she and how old are you

Both mid 40s

[Motormanz50]

You really do not want to know, listen when she tells you but believe me when I tell you you do not want to know

[shooter6.5]

he wants to know and will never have his curiosity satisfied until he does.

First, you better be damn sure you are right.

Then sit down and talk it out. After that if you are prepared to put your mind to rest then continue your time together and never mention it again unless she brings it up.

If you cannot let it go then let her go and move on to another person.

You will never be satisfied until you have an answer. The brain will not let you.!!!!!!!!!!!

[Wendy Whitney]

When some Escorts retire, they want to end that chapter in their life and move on - not to look back. Not all come back to the profession.

If it is a taboo subject, she doesn't want to focus on it. Be there to listen when she wants to talk about it and ask questions at that time. Don't bring it up, respect her wishes.

[James1588]

Originally Posted by Wendy Whitney

When some Escorts retire, they want to end that chapter in their life and move on - not to look back. Not all come back to the profession.

If it is a taboo subject, she doesn't want to focus on it. Be there to listen when she wants to talk about it and ask questions at that time. Don't bring it up, respect her wishes.

Excellent advice (above). First thing to remember about sex work is that it's work. Second thing to remember is that your fiancee is very likely not the only sex worker you've met. Lots of women do sex work at one time or another in their lives, and they look just like "regular" women, because they are regular women. As for talking to her about it, we're all individuals, and everyone has his or her mindset about where they've been and what their experiences have been ... but there is a widespread social stigma, and if I were you, I'd never bring it up. I'm sure she will, if she wants to.

[DSK]

I disagree with the do not bring it up crowd because she doesn't want to talk about it.

If I want to talk about something, she needs to talk about it. Otherwise, she can get her shit and move down the road.

[Old-T]

Originally Posted by Wendy Whitney

When some Escorts retire, they want to end that chapter in their life and move on - not to look back. Not all come back to the profession.

If it is a taboo subject, she doesn't want to focus on it. Be there to listen when she wants to talk about it and ask questions at that time. Don't bring it up, respect her wishes.

Originally Posted by James1588

Excellent advice (above). First thing to remember about sex work is that it's work. Second thing to remember is that your fiancee is very likely not the only sex worker you've met. Lots of women do sex work at one time or another in their lives, and they look just like "regular" women, because they are regular women. As for talking to her about it, we're all individuals, and everyone has his or her mindset about where they've been and what their experiences have been ... but there is a widespread social stigma, and if I were you, I'd never bring it up. I'm sure she will, if she wants to.

I agree with every wise thing you both said.