In honor of my 15,000th post, I'd like share my holiday wishes for my good friends in the Eccie Sandbox. I hope I haven't missed anyone. If I have, I will give you four free tickets to see the Kansas City Chiefs in the Super Bowl this year. For each of you, I wish the following:
Assup: A blowup doll of President Obama, so he can do to it what Obama is doing to us.
KarlMarxRoxny: An illustrated copy of the Communist Manifesto, so he doesn't have to try to understand all the big words.
Choom-who-is-not-Marshall: A few HO HO Hos for his HA HA Has.
TTH: Elevator shoes.
BigTurd: A free one-way ticket to the real world.
IB: An updated, state-of-the-art graphics program so he can continue to piss off the liberals even more than he does now.
Whirly: A “Don't Tread On Me” flag to wave proudly.
OldT: Some young T
JoeBloe: A lifetime supply of asshole repellant.
Essence: A large print copy of our “Fucking Declaration of Independence” and our “Fucking Constitution”.
Timmy: A “Zombie – English, English – Zombie” dictionary so he can communicate better with fellow Democrats.
CBJ7: A gift certificate for Lesson 1 in the course, “How To Understand What People Say.”
Ekim: A coloring book, with a dot-to-dot section to help him advance to more complex subjects.
JD: The teacher's manual for the textbook “How to Make Liberals Understand”. Oh, yeah. The authors gave up, and determined it was hopeless. Sorry, JD.
Little Stevie: Sunglasses.
Big Louie: A copy of “Cut and Paste for Dummies.”
Iffy: An autographed 8x10 glossy of Debbie Wasserman Schultz.
RaggedyAndy: A selection of tingles from Chris Mathew's leg.
The Dali Lama: Salvador Dali's painting of Hello Kitty
Zabrina Sarafina: Me!
SEE3772: The Federal Reserve System
JackieS: A copy of “The Wit and Wisdom of Ed Schultz”. That is, if he ever displays any wit or wisdom.
ACP: Boots
SweetNLittle: More of me!
SteamyRomance: An automatic steam machine.
LexusLover: A Fiat 500
Out of Bounds: Boundaries
Chica Chaser: An automated “fuck you” response button for incoming messages from the RTM button.
LovingKayla: A blow up doll of Glenn Beck (With me inside! HeHe!)
ExNYer: A plastic Statue of Liberty to set by his computer.
Captain Midnight: A special commission which allows him to be out during the day.
CptJohnstone: Extra cookies at the PX.
Doove: A brain
Munchie: A personality transplant from a garden slug. Should make him brighter and more interesting.
Ttalinky: A bag with a picture of Rebecca Romijn, for when you just can't afford that “special someone”.
Icuminpeace: Peace and tranquility at home and abroad. Nah, Just kidding! Get laid good, my friend!
Waco Kid: Year round college football.
KCJoe: A new quarterback.
St. Chris and Col. Zodiak: My continuing and undying admiration.
Dearhunter: An avatar that doesn't make him so easily identifiable.
OliviaHoward: Two hours of uninhibited oral pleasure, at no charge to her!
DallasRain: Same as Olivia, and at the same time if you want!
SkylarCruz: Same as Olivia and Dallas, again at the same time if you want. What can I say? I'm a generous guy! SnL & Sabrina can get in on this, too!
A Happy Christmas to All!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjWQmtgxbMU