Powerball Jackpot Over a BILLION Dollars Tomorrow

[gnadfly]

Feel free to use any of the below numbers when filling out your form.





Good Luck!!

[Rey Lengua]

Originally Posted by gnadfly

Feel free to use any of the below numbers when filling out your form.





Good Luck!!

The # 3 - for the number of "crowns " that Lil Cotex now wears, # 14 - as part of the percent that he won the above poll by ! , # 17 - for the number of write-ins Lil Cotex received in HIS OWN "206" DOTY poll, # 20 - for the total number of votes Lil Cotex received in the 2016 ( NOT 206 !!! ) DOTY poll , # 28 for the number of write-ins Lil Cotex received in the above poll, and # 57, for the other part of the percentage Lil Cotex won the above poll by !!! 3,14,17,20,28,57 as much "winning " as Lil Cotex has done recently, those have to be some good numbers !!! Lemme run to the store and get those numbers "bought " !! Wonder how happy Lil Cotex would be if I won with those numbers :

[Yssup Rider]

Not a political thread in ANY sense. But at least your tongue is in the right place.

[Rey Lengua]

Originally Posted by Yssup Rider

Not a political thread in ANY sense. But at least your tongue is in the right place.

And YOUR head is where it usually is.... in YOUR lying liberal ass. No wonder YOU can't protect those salamanders up there in Austin !

[Jackie S]

I suppose this could be political, since The Lottery is nothing more than a tax on the stupid.

[LexusLover]

Originally Posted by Jackie S

I suppose this could be political, since The Lottery is nothing more than a tax on the stupid.

I was told a couple of days ago that 55 BILLION was taken in on one day before the last PowerBall drawing.

[I B Hankering]

THE PENTAGON JANUARY 13, 2016

Pentagon Spends $10 Million On Powerball Tickets With Hopes Of Bolstering F-35 Program



THE PENTAGON — The Department of Defense announced today that it has purchased five million Powerball tickets at a cost of $2 per ticket, with an aim of providing a funding windfall to the F-35 Joint Strike Fighter program.

“This is a minor fiscal gamble, but the Pentagon is always willing to lay out a few extra bucks in order to ensure we continue to have the most advanced military in the world,” said Secretary of Defense Ashton Carter, flashing a giddy smile. “Daddy needs a new pair of shoes, and a dozen new F-35s for the Navy’s Pacific Fleet.”

The F-35 program has been beleaguered by cost overruns, with a projected lifetime program cost of at least $1.5 trillion. The estimated $1.5 billion dollar Powerball jackpot would amount to only one-tenth of one percent of the total program cost, but it’s an important step in the Pentagon’s search for additional sources of revenue in the face of Congressional questions about the program. With the odds of winning the Powerball jackpot standing at 1-in-292,000,000, the five million tickets give the Pentagon a 1-in-58 chance of winning the jackpot.

A reporter brought to Carter’s attention that the jackpot only totals $1.5 billion dollar jackpot if the Pentagon elects to take the annuity paid out over 29 years, and the alternative lump sum payment would amount to less than $900 million.

“Well, shit,” said Carter. “There’s no sense in taking a 29-year annuity when the F-35 will be obsolete by that time and on the auction block to Iran and Saudi Arabia. But the lump sum payment would still buy three or four F-35s today, I believe.”

The reporter then pointed out the IRS would take almost half of the lump sum payout, leaving the Pentagon with around $500 million. They also noted the Navy’s F-35C variant costs $337 million per unit, leaving the Pentagon able to buy less than two F-35s for the Navy.

“I don’t understand why you guys would even question this,” said a visibly frustrated Carter. “That would still be two more F-35s than we had previously, with a capital expenditure of only ten million dollars in Powerball tickets. That’s a steal.”

Some reporters were critical of the Pentagon gambling taxpayer money in a lottery, leading Carter to become more defensive.

“Look, we’ve already wast—er, expended an extraordinary amount of taxpayer money on this program, so a paltry $10 million is a drop in the bucket,” said a defiant Carter. “No one would have ever noticed this program accruing an extra $10 million in costs if we hadn’t announced it. That’s a damn rounding error.”

As reporters vied to ask the next question, Carter complained, “Gee, I thought you guys would have been more excited about this announcement,” before throwing his hands in the air in exasperation and walking away from the podium.

UPDATE: Duffel Blog has learned that due to a clerical error the Pentagon submitted only five combinations of numbers, with each combination submitted a million times. This has reduced the Pentagon’s chances of winning the Powerball jackpot from 1-in-58 to 1-in-58,000,000. Despite the setback, Carter remains optimistic the Pentagon will now be holding a million winning Powerball tickets.

http://www.duffelblog.com/2016/01/pe...#ixzz3xAKq8ABg

*This is satire.

[JCM800]

I bought $4 dollars worth.

[LexusLover]

"The reporter then pointed out the IRS would take almost half of the lump sum payout, leaving the Pentagon with around $500 million."

Must have been a CNN reporter.

[roaringfork]

Originally Posted by Jackie S

I suppose this could be political, since The Lottery is nothing more than a tax on the stupid.

I guess I sometimes operate on the premise that whereas hope is indeed stupid, fear (and therefore insurance) is not. I'd hate to go to have gone to work this morning and found that all my coworkers had hit, with me as the lone non-participant.

[LexusLover]

I hope that the winners' lives are changed for the better and they use their "new rich" wisely and productively.

[Jackie S]

Originally Posted by LexusLover

I hope that the winners' lives are changed for the better and they use their "new rich" wisely and productively.

That I can agree on.

Word is, somebody did win last night.

[i'va biggen]

Three winners so far......

[Yssup Rider]

Originally Posted by LexusLover

I hope that the winners' lives are changed for the better and they use their "new rich" wisely and productively.

You do? How noble. What a great sport!

Is that statement like your support for the troops? Or your support for the DOTY poll you now top?

[WUF]

Originally Posted by roaringfork

I guess I sometimes operate on the premise that whereas hope is indeed stupid, fear (and therefore insurance) is not. I'd hate to go to have gone to work this morning and found that all my coworkers had hit, with me as the lone non-participant.

totally agree