Significant other

[j_mack4u]

So what would be a good guess for how many providers have a hubby or signiificant other and how many of you hobbyists would support your GF or wife if that's what she chose to do?

I know I would support my better half 100% if that's what she wanted to do.

[handyGiraffe]

LOL...talk is cheap....in every case when I am confronted with a "what would you do" kind of question I find that my first inclination towards an answer is what I WISH I would do ....and is often offset by what I really would do....

[Guest080310]

I have met at least 4 providers with a SO. Most of their guys knew about the hobby although one managed to keep it a secret the whole time. I have met only one married provider that I am aware of and her husband was a hobbiest and they would share their stories. I would not like it if my wife were a provider since I am the jealous type. Some of the ladies have social lives so I am sure they go on dates and have boyfriends.

[Naughty_Jezabelle]

I am really interested in reading this thread! BUt I do agree with HG, that until you are in it, you may not know.

I can speak for the completely SINGLE provider side. I get asked all the time "why are you single ?!?!" And I always respond with "all the men I meet are married" Which is true!

ANother reason may be, I do know as a single girl I have to defend myself constantly from guys that know about me that aren't hobbyist. Girls like us are automatically labled as being dirty ... well a good provider is going to be one of the cleanest girls you will ever meet. (Notice I say "good provider") How often do you think that girl at the bar you picked up and banged get's checked for STD's? We take countless showers, pay extra attention to our bodies, apperance, hygiene, smell, and taste. I can promise that the majorty of the "regular clean girls" don't do all that!

I do go out, but I try not to put myself into situations that might get me a bf. I am happy single, and loving my job. And I don't think I am ready to give that up.

In addition, I am a full time student working on a Masters. I am a single mom, and I work. Between all that... I don't think I have time for a non-hobby friendly relationship.

But if I do find a guy that is ok with me working in the customer service section of the adult sex entertainment industry (LOL) I have decided, I want him to hobby too. Hire him a girl once or twice a week so he can have variety and its a two way street.

[pjpenner]

I met my wife when she was a "call girl." She continued to entertain a select group of clients for 6 years after we married. We've been married for 22 years.

While many spouses think he or she would be OK with it; most are not in actuality. Why? They can't get past the sexual issues, jealousies and their imagination. When, in reality, it's about the money ... always. It's a business.

[DallasRain]

I have an S O and have for over 25 years!! We have been in this lifestyle since day one...on & off over the course of our marriage.
We are also swingers and are very open in our lifestyle...so it works great for us!!! It is so cool that I have a guy who loves to share his "princess"!!!
We know quite a few providers locally who are married or have boyfriends...it seems to work for them as well.

[sanantonioman37]

I used to be involved with a dancer and it was hard. So being a provider, I don't know. Depends on how I find out, If it started out lying and discovered it on my own I would be pissed. But if she told me herself, maybe.

Tough question.

[j_mack4u]

Thanks for all the feedback all, I was worried it may be too personal but you all responded honestly, TY!

Jezabelle, good for you and good luck with the masters and being a single mom.

I've been married twice and have shared my wives with many other men so there aren't any issues that i haven't dealt with. My current wife soon to be ex. met a man and fell in love and has asked for the divorce which I have agreed on. It's an occopational hazard that you have to know is a possibility. I remained mono with her through our relationship by my choice.

Thanks again all and I hope we hear from more.

[RickO'shayRabbitt]

Here's my take: I think I would be okay with it if it was something she and I talked about openly. If she was a provider when we met, and told me about it, I would have the choice to accept it and move on, or not. If she wasn't doing it when we first met, but then we both decided it was something we were ok with, well, then there it is.

Here is where I see it getting sticky. Say she meets a guy and she becomes his favorite. He has lots of cash, so they see each other often, even taking trips together for 3-4 days. Do you start feeling jealous then? Or even if she doesn't have a regular like that, but drops everything when a client calls? Does that bug you? Say you had plans to go to a movie but a guy calls for a 2 hour meet--which is anywhere from $400-700 depending on the rate. Now she is putting that ahead of your time with her. Problem? I dunno. Just saying.

[swwaustin]

I give props to all the ladies who are able to openly balance that tricky situation. As for me? No way I could do it, I am way to insecure for that kind of open relationship.

[Naughty_Jezabelle]

Well Barney,

There is a solution to every situation. If a provider is in a relationship then there must be boundaries. IE: work hours. Meaning work phone is turned off so the said situation never as the chance to occur.

Communication is the key... ecspecially in this type of relationship. My major is relationship psychology, and the most common reason there is problems within relationships is the lack of communication. You have to talk to each other and develop a comfortable medium between all parties. Compromise...

But flip the coin... let's say that your boss calls you after hours, and says there is an emergency I need you to come to work NOW. But you have plans with your wife... Do you go? Of course You DO! Because that is your job. That is how you put money on the table. You can't say no.

I have some demanding regulars. When they call they want to see me then. If at all possible , I try to accomidate that because he will go else where and maybe I just lost a HUGE client.

Once again... communication.. communication... communication!!


BTW LOVE THE SIGNATURE!

[Bowden]

Years ago I dated a stripper and handled that ok. I would like to think that I could handle a SO as a provider but like HG says put your money where you mouth is. I just don't know if I could truly handle that type of relationship.

But you are right Jez the only way it would work is with very good commuication between the partners.