Being Outed or Outing Yourself?

[RALPHEY BOY]

After playing WK( more like 'Point, Counter Point') and getting beat up today about what happened to my buddy BP. I was wondering about Providers who show their face in their ads, website or Avatar.

If you post a clear face picture aren't you already 'outing' yourself? or do you assume this risk from the get go?

Its not rocket science to find Escort sites promoting... well Escorts.

I simply googled Escorts, Austin

[ame="http://www.google.com/search?q=escorts+austin&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-USfficial&client=firefox-a"]escorts austin - Google Search[/ame]

page, after page shows up and if anyone of yall advertise there its real easy to find a picture.

[KosherCowboy]

Originally Posted by RALPHEY BOY

If you post a clear face picture aren't you already 'outing' yourself? or do you assume this risk from the get go?

Its not rocket science to find Escort sites promoting... well Escorts.

a lady never knows what will come down the road, showing ones' face on the net on a site like this or ' rare escort' already screams to LE and others ' look what I do'; not to mention the landlord or management company a lady rents from and this can include her incall as well as her own home. The outing is done before the ' outing'; almost like a basketball getting set up for an alley-oop in basketball. Put your pic on the net one can only hope there isn't someone there to slam dunk it, intentionally or by mistake. If they do, both parties were responsible, one gets points, the other an assist. Without the alley-oop, there would be no dunk. Without a face pic on the net, google could never out you.

Once you show your face on the net, google ( or any search engine) is not your best friend. As we have seen today...

lots of lessons learned, always use a hobby phone and don't show your face on the net especially if you are selling sex, ahem, time

regardless of who is at fault in any outing, it can never help a girl to have her face on the net.

good point REB...or shall I say obvious point....

[nuglet]

REB, I think BIG difference.
It's one thing to be a provider, available to be seen via pics or websites, it quite another to BE OUTED TO A HOSTILE ENTITY, ie: wife, or SO.

It's not like his wife found a hooker site, and raised hell that they exist. HE made a mistake, not the ladies on the website. If they catch shit, then they are their own enemy, but to trust someone, then be screwed over is different.
My daddy always said, Own Your OWN mistakes, It's not up to you to take advantage of an offer, then roll over to try to get out of it by spreading the blame when it blows up in your face.
It's similar to the fact that we don't have our own picture as an avatar. But the girls do, (sometimes).
You, like I, have a different take of screwing around on a wife (I think).
You and I are lucky, but in our case, I think it's a matter of MAKING YOUR OWN LUCK by being honest. I don't hold much sympathy nor empathy for liars, or rats. Of course we don't know "all" the facts here, but I think the info exposed pretty much states the case accurately. Good luck to someone that want's to cause me grief. Anything that would/could be said about me, would be old news to anyone that knows me.
All this BS about "hobby phone", keeping secrets, basically lying all the time. Whether you get caught or not, IT'S STILL A LIE TO YOU LIFE PARTNER!!
Pick and live up to your own reputation. Either you don't care who you lie to, or whom you hurt, or you do. If you do, be honest, if you don't, you're a liar. KEEP IN MIND I AM NOT REFERRING TO "YOU" personally, I know you be to, to my knowledge, above board. If you were to get married, or attached, I suspect, you, like I, would be upfront. Life is soooo much simpler and calmer.

[KosherCowboy]

Originally Posted by nuglet

REB, I think BIG difference.
It's one thing to be a provider, available to be seen via pics or websites, it quite another to BE OUTED TO A HOSTILE ENTITY, ie: wife, or SO.

Hostile or friendly, intentional or unintentional; put your face on the net w/o blurs you are at risk. Period. If there was no face pic, the only thing outed is a phone number or email. As a former mod, I used to get emails from girls begging to have their pics taken down, there is a reason, they can come back to haunt you.

Regardless of who is at fault. Throw a lit match on gasoline it will explode, regardless of who lit the match or how the gasoline was poured.

[RALPHEY BOY]

good points Nuglet,,,

and I am a single man, also my family and friends know what I do.
I did not want to wake up dead one day and have them reading my over 4000 Posts on ASPD

[buffhunter]

Originally Posted by RALPHEY BOY

I did not want to wake up dead one day and have them reading my over 4000 Posts on ASPD

Buzz kill.

I'm out of here boys and girls. The above post caused me just enough concern to bail.

RB, I'm not being critical of your post, just reactionary...

All of you take care,

[Joel Goodson]

It's a double edged sword really. When a gal posts a clear face pic it can be enough to motivate a guy off the fence to see her.

On the other hand, it pretty much ruins your ability to take her out in public and not be potentially outed. Not that you couldn't meet the same gal at a gym, club, wherever and have no idea what she did in her spare time.

That being said, I can appreciate the discretion when she blurs her face and clearly visible distinguishing features/tattoos.

[nuglet]

Originally Posted by BuffHunter

Buzz kill.

I'm out of here boys and girls. The above post caused me just enough concern to bail.

RB, I'm not being critical of your post, just reactionary...

All of you take care,

Buh Bye; Thanks for flying NONvirgin airlines... LOL

[Trisha Dreams]

It 's obvious who you are talking about here. Just to let it be known, I have not had a problem in 3 years. Does that mean I am not aware there is some level of risk? Yes, and pics will be changed promptly due to this. Face pics do help but not enough for this. Sorry to see you go Buff!

[RALPHEY BOY]

Yes, Trisha you would be one of those people.. and yes your situation warranted me to think about this..

I am not singling you out,....

[Carl]

What happened is regrettable. TGFBI fucked up big time, both in getting caught and in ratting out Trisha. But if anyone, ANYONE, really and sincerely expects a guy in that situation should and would never, ever rat some body else out, then they are completely delusional and lying to themselves.

Keep in mind what this "hobby" is about. It about guys paying to fuck, who they want, when they want, how they want. It is the ultimate in pampering and catering to one's own self. It is the ultimate in conspicuous discretionary consumption. It is about the guy's self-gratification. That is what they're paying for.

I know some of the guys (and some of the girls) will go on and on about the GFE and experiencing romance, passion, intimacy, sexual healing, and the like. The guys will tip or bring gifts like flowers or candy or lingerie or perfume. They may read poetry, slow dance, sing a serenade, discuss art or literature or history and share deep personal secrets in between soulful kisses and long smoldering glances. But that's just window dressing.

Guess what! They still want to fuck. All the rest is theatrics, a complex fetish, an opportunity for the provider to satisfy emotional needs, too. It allows the guy to experience the fantasy that the provider really and truly thinks they are amazing. It's like the Cheap Trick song: "I want you to want me." They want to fuck and they want to feel like they are really and truly wanted.

Bottom line: it's still about them. Even if the provider really enjoys what happens, it's still about them, first. That is what they're paying for. The illusion of true romance. Some guys may want to be a submissive. Some guys may want to suck a tranny's cock, swallow her big creamy load, and then have her bang him and crush his prostate with her cockthrusts. And some guys want to feel like they're a gal's special Casanova.

So, if this hobby is about self-gratification, why is anyone surprised when a hobbyist gets busted and is placed under duress that they go with self-preservation first, instead of protecting a paid service provider? Do you really expect some sort of mythical noble, honorable, heroic behavior? This isn't a movie. This isn't "Die Hard" and TGFBI (or any other guy caught in the same bind) isn't John McClane. This isn't "Gladiator" and he isn't Maximus. This isn't "Casablanca" and he isn't Rick Blaine. By his own admission, he's a fat guy that pays (or paid) to fuck chicks with big boobs, preferably with implants, because that was his fetish.

I don't know the details of TGFBI's life but he would post elsewhere that he made most of his money for the year during tax season. My guess is that he's in the financial services sector. Another guess: Annual gross income, probably in six figures with assets (home, cars, property, investments) also in six figures, maybe even seven.

Here's another guess: Once his wife found out she was angrier than a motherfucker and started threatening him to tell her who he was fucking around with or she'd get the best divorce lawyer in town take all those assets, leave him with nothing, make sure he never saw his kids again, and turn their friends and his family against him. Hmmm, let's see: self-preservation or risk losing everything to protect someone that he was paying three figures so he could blow his load on her tits.

I wonder what the Vegas oddsmakers would say? I wonder. He can pretend he's William Wallace and he's living in "Braveheart" and do the honorable(?) thing and protect our little hobby "Scotland" or he can talk and maybe she takes her anger out on somebody else for a little bit while he tries to figure out how not to lose everything he's worked for and maybe call the best divorce lawyer in town before she does.

Damn, sure is a mystery how that predicament might turn out. I know that every, last, single individual I ever met in the hobby or on hobby message boards (even the banned posters) were the most honest, altruistic, noble, honorable, sincere, compassionate people in the world; every damned last one of them. Not a single scurrilous individual. Never had a person disappoint me with their behavior. Fucking saints, all of them (no pun intended).

Now, if y'all will excuse me, I'm gonna go take a shower and beat off.

[RALPHEY BOY]

Carl, you are eloquent as normal, very well put

[LadiesFan]

This sucks all the way around.

I wish everyone the best, Trisha, Big Pimpin', Momma Pimpin'... REB.

[Whispers]

Very Well Put Carl.... Excellant Post

[guest021911]

Carl you missed your callin'....very well said. Your post talks about the big white elephant in the room that nobody would talk about. It's unfortunate that we lost two good folks in the hobby regardless of what happened or who is at fault.