When you feel special

[Sexy Summer]

Has anyone ever had one of those days where you feel like an outcast? Like there are different standards that you have to meet that others don't? Say you're with 5 people that you don't know and spur of the moment you ALL do something stupid but YOU are the only one that suffers the consequence. I know that life is hard and unfair but I want to ask how you would feel. would you feel that an unjust thing was done to you? Would you wonder what the other 5 people did to not suffer the consequences? Would you take action to make sure everyone received the same punishment? Or, would you take your punishment in stride knowing that you were the one that was dealt the bad hand?

Thank you to everyone in advance for your input!

[Dfwgent]

Absolutely---there are days when it seems that nothing goes right no matter how hard you try, and other people seem like they just go out of their way to make things worse. Kinda like the fictional character with the black cloud that was always hanging over his head.

But I think there is more to what you described than that. You alluded to a situation in which a number of people were involved in maybe doing something that in hindsight they (or at least you) would not do again, and you were the only one called out our singled out. I guess that part of my response would depend on what the ramifications to you, relative to the others, are. But another issue, and perhaps one that is more important going forward, is what the reaction of the others was, and is, toward you and the fact that you were singled out for something that they were also involved in. If they just throw you under the bus or pretend that nothing that they also did contributes to the situation that you are in, well I think I would remember their loyalty and reward it by having very little to do with them going forward. I hope that you have a better day.

[LoveNHorny]

I do not disagree with anything dfwgent said, but honestly, if you want the best answer, then why don't you just share what really happened. Just sayin...

Hope things are looking up for ya. Pm if necessary.

[motocrossman39]

Hi Summer, sure I think everyone feels that way at one time or another....what happened and maybe we can put it into context?

Moto

[Lindsay Lee]

20% is what happens to you in life. The other 80% is how you react and deal with it.

Hope things get better for you.

XOXO

[JDNorthface]

Originally Posted by Lindsay Lee

20% is what happens to you in life. The other 80% is how you react and deal with it....

There is much wisdom in this. And it's hard--very hard--to do sometimes.

My reaction would be to wonder why in the world I was wasting my time hanging out with four spine donors. Why did they let you take the fall alone?

I would walk away confidently--and happily--knowing that I'd been fortunate enough to all at once eliminate four people from the millions with which I could spend my time.

[MrKlean]

Everything in life happens for a reason! Learn from this experience and move on. Nothing in life is 100% good or 100% bad, it is a mixture of the two, even though it may not appear that way right now.

Focus on the good in your life, not the bad. This experience will pass, and in the future you will hopefully look back at this experience and have learned something from it.

Good luck

KR

PS Do not concern yourself with what happens to others. Be responsible for your actions. DON'T SNITCH! It never helps your situation, only complicates things for yourself and others.

[Sexy Summer]

My reaction would be to wonder why in the world I was wasting my time hanging out with four spine donors!!!

I completely agree with you there JD. Guess there are always lessons in life. In the end you find out who will be there for you and who will run away when the going gets tough.

[Sexy Summer]

KRiggins, did I name any names or tell anything that would indicate that this has anything to do with eccie? Maybe it's a life lesson, a fictional story, or maybe I'm going through something and just thought I would get everyone's opinion seeing as how most people have gone though something like this in their lives.

P.S. Who said I snitched?

[Guest032213]

just keep your head up , and go on with your life, you are a sweety and noone , i mean noone needs to deal with drama n BS suga.. huggs

[pmdelites]

"Say you're with 5 people that you don't know and spur of the moment you ALL do something stupid but YOU are the only one that suffers the consequence."

like others have said, depends a lot on things.
what was the stupid thing?
did everyone do it at the same time/place?
how come just one person got caught? not enough people to do the catching?
what sort of consequence?

without some more details, it's difficult to say.



but, if five friends and i were doing something stupid and i got caught and suffered the consequences, i'd be pissed that i got caught. but that's the way the dice rolled.
if they gave me shit for getting caught or didnt support me after i got caught, i would seriously consider before i did anything w/ anyone of them again.

a looooooong time ago, i worked as a busboy in a "ladies do lunch" kind of place [i did this just for the summer]. i worked a special event one night. one of the full-time employees [about my age; he'd worked there for 6+ months and would continue to work there] told several of us to meet in the stockroom where we opened and enjoyed a bottle of champagne [it was good stuff, not crap champagne]. after 10 mins or so, the supervisor came in [he was looking for us to get back to work] and said "hey, what the hell is going on!!" spineless guts we were, we all split and left the full-time employee all by himself to catch it from the supervisor. he got chewed out, but not much more than that; fortunately, he didnt get fired.

to this day, i wish i could tell the guy i was sorry i left him there w/out my taking responsibilty for it all [since i didnt need the job].

[Sexy Summer]

Lets just say the system isn't always perfect. Some are on the inside, some on the outside. Fyi, They were never friends!

[anita]

I will just assume my consequences. The others were lucky enough to avoid those consequences, why should I ruin that for them. But yes, life is unfair sometimes.

[JDNorthface]

Originally Posted by Sexy Summer

...Guess there are always lessons in life. ...

I think so. Which means that we are ALL always learning. I think the winners are the ones who learn self-control and decorum in the process. I love Kipling's words:,

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

...

...you'll be a Man my son!

[Doogie211]

Life doesn't happen to us. We are active participants and need to be responsible for our actions and accpet that for the outcome to change it starts with our behavior changing. We cause life to happen by our actions and inactions. Learn and move forward.