What is the difference

[Lucky40]

As human beings (men and women), our flesh is driven by its physical desires such as the desire for food, sex; or psychological desires such as the love of fame, praise, just to name a few. No doubt for men, our greedy hormones try to push us towards fulfilling our fantasy. Whether our temptations (desires) are "minor" or life dominating, one thing is certain--- as a hobbyist by definition ---- we have these temptations to be with more than one woman. For women in general, I think sex with one man is the most rewarding and a woman knows this. More than likely a provider who wishes to change her life, she will be very grateful to a man who wishes to be faithful to her and more than likely the sex that she has with him will be the best she ever had even if she was faking her orgasms.

This leads me to pose this question “what is the difference between provider/SO in terms of fulfilling your sexual needs? And for providers “what is the difference between client/SO?

[atlcomedy]

blow jobs

[charlestudor2005]

atl is part right.

Anything other than the missionary position separates the SO from the provider, who is willing to go at it in most positions. It is also the frequency. You tend to bang providers as often as you have money to do so. With SOs, it doesn't matter how often you have money. You still don't get laid as often.

[pjorourke]

Providers dont get headaches.

[charlestudor2005]

Originally Posted by pjorourke

Providers dont get headaches.

Oh, I think they do. It's just not used as an excuse to avoid sex.

[Ansley]

Originally Posted by Lucky40

And for providers “what is the difference between client/SO?

Don't know and will never know. When I came into this business, I knew that having a SO would be out of the question. One reason is, it sounds too complicated. At the risk of sounding hypocritical, I will keep the other reasons to myself.

[CyberProf]

For some man out there, this can only be seen as bad news. For those of us in the hobby - it is irrelevant.

But, back on topic: I think the big differences stem from desire driven goals and objectives - if someone has an addictive/obsessive drive, then their interests and drive will be shaped by this. We are all different, yet surprising the same.

Originally Posted by Ansley

Don't know and will never know. When I came into this business, I knew that having a SO would be out of the question. One reason is, it sounds too complicated. At the risk of sounding hypocritical, I will keep the other reasons to myself.

[Lucky40]

Let me fuel the discussion a bit in civilized manner.

I think most people live in an instant gratification society, and typically on this venue, people are disposable, as there are many more on the net to move on to. Some guys just want PSE for pure physical pleasures (raw sex), while other guys want GFE for physical pleasures (lovemaking). The first group screw like rabbits and move on “pardon my French” treating the lady as if she commodities to be bought or walking orifices for his personal pleasure; while the second group try to be considerate to her emotional and physical state. In rare occasion, some might considerate it a ritual event not just a sexual act and may call it mutual sexual imprint where both have a unique set of features that naturally attract each other.

§ How would you feel when she, whether a provider/SO, turns you down for whatever reasons, would you insist in meeting your needs? Do you have the same reaction?

§ Do you feel you have the same rights in meeting your needs with your SO compared to a provider because you provide monetary benefits to both of them?

§ Do you feel a provider is one person who never gets to say no to someone whom they are not obliged to, but with your SO, she has a choice as to when and how? In other words, do you feel entitled to whatever you want, whenever you want it with your SO?

§ Are you sensitive enough to predict how does your SO/provider feel if you say or do something irritate her?

[pjorourke]

Originally Posted by Lucky40

Some guys just want PSE for pure physical pleasures (raw sex), while other guys want GFE for physical pleasures (lovemaking). The first group screw like rabbits and move on “pardon my French” treating the lady as if she commodities to be bought or walking orifices for his personal pleasure; while the second group try to be considerate to her emotional and physical state.

You need to meet more GFE ladies. I've met plenty that can fuck like bunnies.

[charlestudor2005]

See my comments:

Originally Posted by Lucky40

§ How would you feel when she, whether a provider/SO, turns you down for whatever reasons, would you insist in meeting your needs? Do you have the same reaction?

I don't understand this question. It needs to be clearer. Do you mean I force myself on the SO? I've never had a provider turn me down...as long as she showed up. I don't count the NCNS occurrences.

§ Do you feel you have the same rights in meeting your needs with your SO compared to a provider because you provide monetary benefits to both of them?

Nope. I've pretty much given up on sex with the SO, while both the provider and I know the whole purpose of the date is to get me to cum. If she gets happy in the process, it's a bonus to her. But I'm paying to get my rocks off.

§ Do you feel a provider is one person who never gets to say no to someone whom they are not obliged to, but with your SO, she has a choice as to when and how? In other words, do you feel entitled to whatever you want, whenever you want it with your SO?

Nah, I think providers are free to say "no" to anything that makes them uncomfortable/dangerous/painful. I don't know about others, but I don't control the sex with the SO. She controls it entirely. It has been a sexless relationship for years. I know, TMI.

§ Are you sensitive enough to predict how does your SO/provider feel if you say or do something irritate her?

Sometimes yes, sometimes no. I live in peak and valley hell with this. My SO is easily pissed. However, she gets over it quickly.

[DallasRain]

IN MY SITUATION----the only difference between my S O and my client is money!!
I still get the same mind blowing fulfilling sex with my S O that I get with my clients,but I don't get paid from my S O...lol!!!

[charlestudor2005]

Originally Posted by DallasRain

IN MY SITUATION----the only difference between my S O and my client is money!!
I still get the same mind blowing fulfilling sex with my S O that I get with my clients,but I don't get paid from my S O...lol!!!

All I can say is that your SO is lucky he's getting sex...and mind-blowing at that.

[Tiffani Jameson]

To answer that question would be to answer the question of what is the problem with relationships.

I, for one, don't think there should be a difference in having sex as a provider and having sex with a SO. Both should be fulfilling and memorable to both parties. But the key word here is 'should'. There are so many variables with both men and women that affect our personalities and attitudes towards the two 'types' of sex.

Men, and the sensitive souls they are, are highly affected by the way they are treated by women in general, and only a very small percentage of men treat women on a case by case basis. Another factor in this is guilt. Then you have men that just want what they want. You can take the best of men, in a healthy sexual relationship with a SO and a provider may notice a lack of wanting to connect with her, and the encounter ends up being just two people humping, and then they go home. You can take the most insecure man in the world, having no relationship or in a loveless/unfulfilling one, and he can be a lady's best client. But no matter what man you meet, the ability to be honest about your feelings and what you want is the best part of meeting providers.

Then you have to think about the provider, who should be versatile enough to sense your needs from communications. But let's talk about mismatches in personalities. Let's take our guy who may be a bit shy and forming a connection is key to enjoying his time with a provider. If he books "Miss SuperPSE" it's possible he may not take from the encounter what he expects. Or if "Mr. Jaded-about-women" meets "Miss Sensitive GFE", who wants to get to know each other when all he wants to know is how far can she get his thing down her throat, he may think she's a little slow to the punch about his needs.

No one person is normal, and when you combine two people, it's either going to work or not. And sex, no matter who we're having it with is a necessity. But the only thing that we can hope for in life is having good sex, and positive encounters.

[Ansley]

Originally Posted by Tiffani Jameson

I, for one, don't think there should be a difference in having sex as a provider and having sex with a SO.

What a great post. I agreed with all of what you shared except for the line above. Please know that I am not trying to speak for other women, just myself. I feel like my dates are very GFE. I feel lucky that I have clicked with about 85% of the men that I have seen. I will admit though, Ansley can't give the same experience that I would give a SO. With a SO there is love, trust and not to many boundaries. When I have those three things it really does take sex to a whole different level.

[Guest042611]

Just like a hook-up is different from sex in a long-term relationship, both can be fabulous, exciting and intimate in their own ways, but it's different. It's funny how something about sex with a stranger can feel more intimate than sex with your long-term lover sometimes.

I've had amazing experiences with clients that were exciting just because we didn't know each other very well, and could therefore be *very* uninhibited with each other. If you know you don't have to see the person doing mundane things the next day (washing dishes, getting dressed, brushing their teeth), it's like the two of you can exist in this beautiful sexual vortex that's separate from the rest of the world. You only see one another in this mindset and it can be very exciting and freeing; you exist to one another as lovers and nothing else.

SO sex is equally wonderful in a different way, and if you're extremely lucky, you can find the capacity for both in the same person.